Healing a Damaged Soul
by Hank's Lady
Summary: Manipulative and bitchy Bella hurts Jacob and then moves on to sweet and innocent Edward, attracted by his money. Can Jacob help Edward repair the damage Bella does during the time they are together and will Bella get what she deserves? Rated M for lemons and this is a slash story, so don't read it if this isn't your thing.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters, just borrowing them for a while.**

**This is an All Human story and is rated M, mainly for lemons and it's slash, people, so if this isn't your thing, don't read it.**

**For all of you Edward lovers, this is my first story which includes him as a main character, so I hope you enjoy. For those of you who really aren't keen, I hope you at least dislike him a little less after this ;o)**

**Thank you to Meghan for helping me come up with the title :o)**

HEALING A DAMAGED SOUL

CHAPTER ONE

**Jacob's POV**

"_I can't see you any more. There's someone else. I met someone else."_

Those words haunted me for weeks. I tried everything to forget her - drowning my sorrows; riding my motorcycle with the throttle pinned, the wind feeling like it would tear my head from my neck and the bars shaking with the threat of a tank-slapper; even picking up strangers in bars, something I had never done and never even considered before. Much to my shame I could barely even remember their names; a willowy blonde, a voluptuous redhead, a brunette with freckles, a guy I met in Forks when I was drunk. He really liked me and it freaked me the hell out, but I took his number with me when I left in the morning anyway. Still I didn't forget.

I had only been with her six months since just before my twenty-first birthday and she was my first love, the first one I gave myself to – I was a ridiculously late starter – and I thought I would be with her forever. Then she threw it all back in my face and told me she wanted someone else. _Edward Cullen._

I didn't know much about him. I had seen him in school when we were all younger and he looked like a freak to me – pale and interesting, I think they call it. He was pale, as if he'd never seen the sun and his hair looked like it had been cut by a blind person right before he got dragged through a hedge backwards. He wore narrow-rimmed wire glasses most of the time which gave him a bookish appearance. He lived in a huge house in the woods outside of Forks and was one of Doctor Carlisle and Esme Cullen's three boys. I knew the middle one slightly as he was close to my age. Jasper had been on the football team with me briefly until the other guys took exception to the fact that he was gay and proud of it. The eldest, Emmett, had finished school several years before, but from what I'd heard he seemed like an ok guy. He often hung out with Sam Uley, either on the Reservation or in Forks and I knew Sam had been over to the Cullens' house plenty of times to work out with Emmett in their private gym. It was only Edward that I hated without even knowing him, because he had _her._

I couldn't imagine what Bella saw in him. A more awkward individual I had never seen; geeky, uncomfortable in his own skin and certainly the exact opposite of what Bella usually liked. Her thing was tall, dark, muscular and sexy – not that I thought I was this last, but she apparently had at least for a while. I certainly couldn't describe Edward as sexy and if his body was remotely attractive, he kept it well hidden under button-down shirts and slacks, usually with a Gucci or Armani label or something similar.

Then it hit me. It wasn't that she liked his looks in particular or whatever he might do for her in the sack – she liked his money. He oozed money from every pore – the whole family did – and Bella was nothing if not materialistic. She wanted what he could give her, something that a mechanic like me never could.

I had run into him just once after they got together and I couldn't resist needling him. He was in a grocery store in Forks although God alone knew why - didn't the Cullens have servants for that type of thing? However, he was standing in front of the wine shelves, apparently picking something from the most expensive reds available.

"Hey, Cullen, if that's for Bella she's not gonna like it, she prefers white." I had told myself to just go about my business and ignore him, but I couldn't help it.

Edward turned slightly towards me and actually smirked as he looked me up and down. "I know."

I wanted to punch the smug look off of his face and I growled audibly.

"You're jealous," he added mildly.

"No, I'm sorry for you," I grunted.

"Sorry for me? How can that be? I'm the one who has Bella." He turned back to the wine shelves and shuffled slightly left towards the white wine. I snorted.

"I'm aware of that, Cullen, but there's a pattern forming. She left some guy to be with me and now she's done the same thing again. I have no doubt she'll crush you like a bug pretty soon."

"Perhaps she just hadn't found the right man up to now."

"And maybe she just hadn't found one with a large enough bank account," I hissed in his ear, leaning close enough to make him jump and sidestep. His smug expression dissolved into a slightly uncomfortable one and he bit his lip before answering.

"That's nothing to do with it."

"We'll see, won't we?"

It was my turn to be smug and I walked away, leaving him with the wine. I grabbed the few items I had gone into the store to buy and left quickly, heading back to my truck. The minute I was outside I was kicking myself. Edward hadn't done anything to deserve that. Yes, he had Bella, but it was her choice - he didn't drag her away from me kicking and screaming and it wasn't like me to have a go at someone that way. It was a kind of dog in the manger feeling, I realised. I knew I'd had a lucky escape from her, but it didn't mean I wanted to see her swanning around with someone else and his attitude had gotten up my nose.

I drove home, annoyed with myself for dwelling on it all again. I had been pretty miserable with Bella, so why the fuck had it bothered me so much when she ditched me? All my friends had said I changed when I was with her and I knew they were right - I barely saw them during those few months for one thing. _She_ wouldn't let me.

"Fuck!" I snarled aloud as I stepped harder on the gas. I let a woman tell me what to do - countless times. Well, it wasn't quite like that. She was clever and manipulative; she would say and do things that made you feel like your actions were hurting her and then of course you would do anything you could to make her feel better, which was exactly what she intended.

_"Don't you love me any more, Jacob? Would you rather be with your friends than me? I know they don't like me, I'm scared they'll turn you against me."_

Words like those were usually accompanied by big brown eyes filling with tears and lips trembling. I had let myself be coerced and manipulated for far too long, thinking she was a delicate little flower who yearned so much for my company that she couldn't bear it if I spent time with anyone else. I had virtually abandoned Embry and Quil and Seth when I was with her and I was just lucky they were as tolerant as they were and saw right through her, because they were still there waiting for me when I was free again. Despite that, I had felt it necessary to grovel to them for the way I had rapidly slipped away from them during those months.

I wondered if she was doing the same thing to Edward Cullen. He looked like the type of sucker that would give in to pretty much anything and I would have been willing to bet his credit card was taking a hammering lately. That was one thing Bella hadn't been able to do with me. I had bought her some earrings once - a hundred bucks they cost me; everything I had in the bank at that time - and she actually sneered when she thanked me for them. I never saw her wear them.

"Shit, Jacob, forget the bitch!" I ordered myself. Why the hell would I feel jealous of Edward for this? My life was my own again; I didn't have to worry about every little detail that might piss her off and I was over the initial hurt of being finished with. I guess I kept going over and over it in my head because part of me couldn't believe I had put up with as much as I had. If someone had told me a year ago that I would have let a woman treat me like that, I would have laughed in their face. I certainly hadn't told my friends about the way things had been; I was too ashamed of myself.

**Edward's POV**

It had all happened so fast and I felt as if I were being swept along by a whirlwind. I didn't even remember us discussing me moving into Bella's house. Had she asked me to? Had I suggested it? Whichever it was, somehow I was doing it and I was excited and eager and scared. She was so much older than me. What if she got tired of me? She might find someone her own age, someone more confident. What would happen to me then? I'd have to crawl home with my tail between my legs and face the taunts of Jasper and Emmett and the over the top sympathy of Mom and Dad. I would just have to do my utmost to make sure that didn't happen. Bella was difficult to please, but I knew a big part of it was the fact that she longed to see more of me and every time I left her to go home, she would look so sad and cling to me until the last possible second.

I finished packing my clothes into the two large cases and set them aside by the door before grabbing a box for my CD collection and books. I looked at the folders of sheet music on one of the shelves and decided there was no point taking them. Bella didn't have a piano and she hated that type of music anyway - said it was old-fashioned and boring.

"Edward! Hurry up!"

That was her - Bella. She was waiting downstairs and I had been hearing her heels clicking up and down the hallway while she waited for me to get my things together. The rest of the family were out working and Mom was shopping. All of them had said goodbye to me before they went, although it wasn't really goodbye - I was going to be living less than five miles away and we'd see each other all the time.

"Almost done, sweetheart, I won't be long!" I called out quickly. I was holding her up and I knew I was going to hear about it later.

I finished packing everything and finally added two photographs to the last box - one of me with my brothers, Emmett and Jasper, taken several years ago and the other of my parents. I doubted Bella would want them on display in her house, but I would keep them somewhere, perhaps on a shelf with my books.

I took one last look around the room I had slept in my whole life until then. It seemed strange that I was leaving it - leaving the house and my family - and I chewed my lip uncertainly for a moment. It felt as if I was leaving part of myself behind.

I cast my mind back to my childhood and found myself smiling as I remembered Jasper and me, only a year between us, constantly bossed around by Emmett who was six years older than Jasper. Right from his early teens, Emmett had been a keen athlete, playing football and hockey in school and then concentrating more on building up his muscles. He was huge now and spent hours in our gym downstairs, virtually every day. Since the age of about sixteen he'd had a constant stream of girls chasing after him and had probably dated half of Forks at one time or another. Then a year ago he met Rosalie Hale, the daughter of one of our father's friends, and he changed completely. He was _in love_ and he doted on Rosalie. She scared the shit out of Jasper and me and had Emmett wrapped around her little finger, but he was as happy as I'd ever seen him.

Jasper, on the other hand, was gay. He announced it over dinner one Sunday when he was fourteen, as bold as brass, looking at the rest of us one at a time almost defiantly as if daring us to say anything derogatory. Emmett just laughed and said he would grow out of it. Mom said of course she loved him and would support whatever choice he decided was best for him. Dad huffed and sighed and told him to take his time and not rush through decisions as important as that; he was too young to know what he wanted. I had said nothing. If anything I was a bit shocked that one of my brothers was _one of them,_ but then again it wouldn't have surprised me if he had just been doing it for effect; Jasper loved attention, no matter whether it was good or bad.

There was a Native boy in some of my classes at school - Seth Clearwater - who everyone knew was gay. He kept it to himself but someone had found out and he got a lot of shit for it. I had seen him heading for the bus stop after school in tears a few times after groups of boys had yelled out insults such as 'fag' to him. I had no doubt the same thing was in store for Jasper and I wished he would quit trying to shock everybody and just be normal. He talked to me about it later and explained it wasn't like you made a choice - it was who he was and he guessed he was born that way - but I still didn't get how he could like boys. I did stop thinking he was making it up though.

My thoughts skipped forward a few years to my seventeenth birthday, by which time Jasper had probably dated five or six different boys and the rest of the family had just gotten used to it. Jasper had even dated Seth for about six weeks one summer although it never really worked between them. They were chalk and cheese and Jasper confessed he only liked Seth because he was 'hot'.

My parents had decided to throw a party for me and I had been dreading it. The complete opposite of Jasper, I hated anything that drew attention to me and they knew that, but they were convinced all I needed was a little encouragement to come out of my shell and lose the shyness and a party with a couple dozen kids from school that I barely knew was a great way to go about it. What was worse, was that Mom and Dad went away overnight leaving Emmett in charge of us. At twenty-four he was responsible as far as our parents were concerned, but with them gone he saw it as a great opportunity to invite two muscle-bound friends and several scantily clad girls to the party, although they abandoned us early on and spent the rest of their evening in the gym.

Jasper's current boyfriend was also invited. He was a tall, lanky guy named Steven who couldn't keep his hands off of Jasper, even in front of me and I couldn't stand him. I often caught him looking at me funny and it gave me the creeps. I had told Jasper about it once and he just laughed and told me to get over myself.

_"Jeez, Edward, he's not doing any harm looking. He thinks you're cute, that's all. Don't be such a pussy."_

I had done my best to enjoy the party, fixing a fake smile to my face, trying to talk to people - _girls_ - that I only knew by sight and failing miserably at it. I had nothing to say - fact. Girls seemed like a completely different race to me, all of them confident and chatty and giggly and much as I wanted one of them to take a liking to me and maybe give me a kiss on my birthday, I didn't hold out much hope.

I had eventually slipped away from the crowd of dancers in the lounge, pulsing away to one of Jasper's awful trance CD's, and made my way up to my room. No one would miss me, I thought. The birthday boy was the least noticeable person in the house.

"Hey, little Eddie, what are you doing up here?"

Damnit. Steven was on the landing, having apparently just come out of the bathroom. I knew Jasper was downstairs because I'd passed him helping himself to a bottle of Dad's rum right before I made my escape.

"I'm going to get something from my room," I said, sidling past him.

"Hey, not so fast." Hands gripped my shoulders and turned me around and I found myself trapped, my back to the wall, his body in front of me and his hands on the wall either side of my head.

"Wh-what do you want, Steven?" I stammered.

"Well, you might be a bit more friendly. It's your birthday, you're supposed to be enjoying yourself. How about I help you to enjoy it a bit more?"

He leaned closer and I froze and turned my head to the side. Shit, he was going to kiss me. I shivered and my heart began to bang frantically against my ribs as he gripped my chin suddenly and forced me to tilt my head back and look up at him.

"Don't," I whispered.

"Sshh, you might like it." His mouth covered mine and there was nothing I could do to avoid it. His hand continued to hold my head still and his tongue plunged between my lips, exploring and tasting while his lips crushed mine. His other hand slid between me and the wall, creeping down to my butt while he pressed himself against me, his very obvious erection digging into my stomach. It seemed to go on and on and I had no idea what to do with myself. My arms hung limply at my sides and I stopped breathing until he stepped away from me.

"You know, you'd enjoy it a lot more if you loosened up," Steven smirked, stroking a finger down my cheek.

I found my voice and the ability to move all of a sudden, thrusting both hands against his chest and shoving him away from me.

"Get away from me, you damned fag!" I yelled and darted into my room, slamming the door in his surprised face. I shot the bolt, leaned on the door for a moment and then slid down it until I was sitting on the ground, my arms wrapped around my knees.

I was shaking from head to foot and I could feel my face burning, my heart pounding. I didn't want my first kiss to be like that - with Jasper's creepy boyfriend. I'd had ideas of inviting some girl to prom - if I ever plucked up the courage - and kissing her gently, sweetly at midnight as we danced to a slow song, even though I knew it was stupid. That was the stuff that only happened in romantic movies. But anything would have been better than what actually happened. Why did my first kiss have to be with a _boy?_

I realised my fists were clenched and when I caught sight of myself in the long mirror on the wall opposite, my face was scarlet.

_I liked it._

I was completely mortified by this realisation and I had stayed locked in my room until Emmett eventually finished his private party and threw everyone else out, Steven included. It was only when I heard silence downstairs that I dared open the door and then I came face to face with Jasper, his eyes flashing and mouth set in a thin line.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Edward? I don't give a shit if you're gay too, but at least have the decency to get your own man!"

"Wh-what? _He_ kissed _m__e!" _I exclaimed.

"Yeah, but you weren't fighting it, were you? I saw you, practically melting in his arms! How do you think that made me feel, huh, Edward?"

"I don't know, but it made me feel sick!" I cried. "I didn't do anything! I'm not a fag! I hated it!"

Jasper's fist was snatched out of the air by Emmett's huge hand a second before it hit my face and he had given Jasper an earful about it. It turned out that he had seen what happened and hung around long enough to see my reaction, which Jasper hadn't. Jasper stormed off to his room in a temper and slammed the door so hard it shook in its frame.

"Don't worry, Edward, that piece of shit Steven won't come here again if he values his life," Emmett growled.

The whole episode hadn't exactly done much for my confidence. All it had served to do was convince me that boys liked the look of me and girls didn't and I only withdrew further into myself until I finished school. I then took a web designing course and started working from home building small websites for people or fixing problems they had with their computers. I had built myself a small site advertising my services and it was that which brought Bella to me, with a completely broken down laptop which I hadn't a hope of fixing. I did the best I could with the thing while she insisted on keeping me company for hours, but it was a lost cause and even though I knew that when I began, I didn't want to fail with my first real job, especially since she was gazing at me with the most beautiful big brown eyes I'd ever seen and kept touching my hand as she talked to me. She was older than me - quite a bit older - but she _liked_ me. Even to a complete innocent like me that was obvious and I fell under her spell in an instant. I gave her my six month old MacBook to replace the laptop and charged her fifty bucks for my time. She left with my phone number and a promise to call me for a dinner date, which she did the next day.

_"Edward! What on earth are you doing up there?"_

I lurched out of my reverie and grabbed the two cases quickly, dragging them out of the room and down the stairs to where Bella waited. Three journeys up and down stairs later, everything was crammed into my Volvo and I was buckling my seat belt, as ready as I would ever be to start my new life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow, thank you all very much for the overwhelming response to my first chapter! Hope you continue to enjoy the story :D**

CHAPTER TWO

******Jacob's POV**

I had finally managed to stop beating myself up for letting Bella trample all over me and shoved her and her little toyboy Cullen to the furthest corner of my mind. I had been single around six months now and having stopped with the stupid one-nighters, I realised I actually would have liked to find someone to date, someone to spend time with who I had things in common with. I wasn't quite sure how to go about meeting the sort of person who would be looking for a relationship and because I spent virtually all of my time on the Reservation, the only new people I got to see were my customers at the garage. I wasn't really even sure what I wanted exactly, but somehow that one night with the guy in Forks kept niggling at me. But how did one meet a guy like that? I had no clue. The only gay guy I knew was Seth and he was like my little brother so there was no way I would go there. Perhaps one of those dating websites, I thought idly, although I couldn't see myself meeting up with some random stranger who might turn out to be a complete creep. But did I really want everything that seeing a guy entailed? Like coming out?

I pondered for about a week and considered suggesting having some nights out in Forks or perhaps PA with Embry and Quil, but if I was going to meet a guy, I sure as hell didn't want them hanging around me. I could never forget that Embry was responsible for my very early wonderings when we had all been about sixeen. One day I had found myself gawking at him in the locker room at school and been horrified with myself, but subsequently I'd found it difficult not to keep looking at him at every opportunity. It probably went on for about six months, with things getting increasingly awkward for me during the summer when the three of us spent time at the beach and the sight of Embry soaking wet and in clingy shorts started making me hard. The times I made excuses not to swim, simply because I knew if I took my jeans off they would both notice. Much to my relief, I got over it during the Christmas holidays when he went back to Neah Bay with his Mom for three weeks and I didn't see him and by the time he returned things were cool again. Somehow I had never let him find out what my feelings had been.

Now I placed the last box of parts in the back of the truck and climbed into the cab. I was parked facing the warehouse and I shifted the truck into reverse. I really needed to do something about the exhaust system - there was a hole in it and the noise was getting ridiculous, not to mention the fact that if the cops caught me I would be in trouble. I was always too busy fixing other people's vehicles to fix my own. Consequently I didn't hear the car driving into the parking lot and backed up quickly, turning as I did so towards the entrance. The sickening crunch drowned out even the truck's exhaust and I hit the brake quickly. Fuck! Just what I needed. I only hoped I hadn't done someone an injury, as well as damaged their vehicle.

I pulled forward again, leaped out of the truck and came face to face with a young Native guy, about Seth's size and age, gazing at the dented and scratched front wing of his yellow Bug, the fender half hanging off. The guy looked vaguely familiar and I wondered if he was from the Reservation.

"Oh, shit, man, I'm sorry!" I exclaimed. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, don't sweat it. Not so sure about the car, though." He grimaced and scratched his head.

"Do you want my insurance details?" I offered. "Or do you want me to just fix the car? I have my own garage. I can get the parts from here wholesale and fit them myself. I have a friend with a spray shop. I'm so sorry."

"I'm cool with you fixing it yourself, I don't really want to involve the insurance companies. I'd end up with some shop I've never heard of doing the repairs and you'll have a black mark and a bigger premium."

"Thanks," I said in relief. "If you want to follow me back to La Push I'll check it over and see what parts are needed. Better take that fender off first though." I went to the cab and grabbed some tools. "What's your name?"

"Brady Fuller. You're Jacob Black, aren't you?" he said with a sudden grin. "Seth's friend? I don't know if you remember me; I've been living in Seattle with my Mom since my parents split about five years ago. She got a new guy I don't get along with so I moved back to live with my Dad."

"I thought you looked familiar," I said and smiled at him. He looked nice, I realised, with shaggy dark hair hanging in his brown eyes and dimples in his cheeks emphasising his cheeky grin. He was wearing a suit, the collar of his shirt unfastened and a grey tie hanging loose. He seemed to be staring at me with interest too and I switched my attention to the fender. "Have you seen Seth since you came back?" I asked.

"Yeah, I've been back a week. We caught up Sunday. I've just been into town for a job interview."

"Hope you get it," I said. "What do you do?"

"I'm a computer geek," he chuckled.

"So what are you doing here at the warehouse?"

"I was actually heading to the diner for a late lunch," Brady said, waving vaguely in the direction of the eatery which shared the warehouse parking lot.

I straightened up, the fender in my hands and threw it into the back of the truck. "I'm pretty hungry, perhaps I could buy you lunch by way of an apology," I offered and then hoped he wouldn't take it the wrong way. It sounded like a request for a date, or maybe that was just me. I was hopeless at this, probably because I had only really dated Bella and it was her who did the pursuing. I liked the look of Brady, but I had no clue whether he was even gay. I mean, how do you tell?

"Sure, thanks, but you don't need to apologise," Brady said, getting into his car to move it into a parking space. He slid out again and locked it a moment later and we walked over to the diner.

The usual lunchtime rush was over and only one or two tables were occupied. We took a corner table and picked up the menus. A waitress appeared after a moment with a jug of coffee.

"Thanks," I said, pushing the empty cup in front of me to the side of the table. "Just black."

"Me too," Brady said without looking up. "Can I get a chilli dog and fries, please?"

"I'll have the same," I agreed.

The waitress finished pouring the coffees and set off to get our order. Brady scooped two sugars into his coffee and stirred vigorously, then leaned back in his seat and slithered down slightly, his knee bumping mine under the table. He smirked and peeked at me through long lashes and wind-swept hair. I studied him curiously over the rim of my coffee cup as I took a sip. Did the guy like me? I really had no idea although it seemed like he was perhaps flirting.

"So, do you see a lot of Seth?" he asked me.

"Not as much as I'd like."

"Yeah, he's great company. I thought about asking him out, but it'd never work, we're too alike."

"Oh, you're...?"

"Yeah," he grinned. "You don't do this much, do you?"

"Do what? You think I'm trying to pick you up?" I blurted, lowering my voice halfway through the sentence.

"Aren't you?" Brady's eyes twinkled and he shifted his leg under the table and bumped it against mine again.

I relaxed slightly and looked him over as inconspicuously as I could manage. He was attractive, I thought and I would have been willing to bet he was good fun. I was fairly sure he was the same age as Seth, which made him two years younger than me. Our food arrived and I put my coffee down and stopped staring.

Somehow we spent ninety minutes over the meal, following up the mains with chocolate brownie sundaes and more coffee. After the first few minutes of not really knowing what else to say to him, I found I had plenty to say and somehow managed to drop into the conversation that neither Seth nor anyone else had a clue I was interested in guys.

"How'd you manage to keep that a secret on the Res?" Brady teased.

"Easy enough, I've only been in one relationship that ended last year and it was with a girl. I just had a one-night thing with a guy after that."

"So you're bi, then."

I couldn't help smirking. "I'm not so sure any more. The woman I was seeing went a long way to putting me off girls for life!"

Brady laughed. "So are you looking for a guy to date, or to fool around with?"

"Um...the first one, I guess."

"Sounds good to me. Why don't we hook up Friday and see where we go from there?" he said confidently.

And so that was how it started. I took him to the movies Friday night and we picked up fried chicken afterwards. He was cute and funny and sexy and we got along like a house on fire. Two weeks later I slept with him and it was the next morning that he suggested I might want to tell my friends something because it was awkward for him to spend time with Seth and keep secrets from his best friend.

I was nervous as hell about telling Seth, which was stupid really. He was gay himself and I knew he looked up to me so there was no reason for him to be disappointed. I went to see him and after five minutes 'umming' and 'aahing' I just blurted it out.

"I'm dating Brady."

"I wondered if you would tell me."

"Wh-what?" I gasped. "Did Brady tell you already?" He had promised he wouldn't.

"No, I meant I wondered if you would tell me you were into guys. There was this guy in Forks, wasn't there, not long after you and Bella split?" Seth smirked at what I imagined was a completely shocked expression on my face.

"How the hell did you know about that?"

"His name was Chris, right? Well, not long after that he started seeing a guy named Brett who used to date Jasper Cullen and Jasper still talks to Brett so he found out and called me to ask if I knew you'd been playing for the other team."

"Fuck," I muttered. "Jasper's got a fucking big mouth."

"Sorry," Seth grinned.

"I didn't even know you still talked to him."

"Sure I do, it was never going to work out with him, we had nothing in common, I only liked him because he's hot, but he's still my friend."

"Oh." I had no idea what else to say and I began to wonder if the other guys knew.

"No one else knows," Seth said as if he had read my mind. "I mean, Embry and Quil don't."

"How do you know that?"

"Because Quil's got a bigger mouth than Jasper and he would have told me if he heard anything. You're going to tell them though, so it doesn't matter anyway, does it?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"So...you and Brady? I think that's awesome!" Seth said then. "My best friend and my other best friend." He laughed suddenly. "I wondered why he'd been so weird lately; kind of excited all the time, but when I asked what was going on with him he made up all kinds of stupid shit."

"Yeah, I ran into him, quite literally," I said and told him pretty much everything about what had happened since. I was still there talking to him when Embry and Quil came over an hour later and after a little while deliberating, I went ahead and told them too. Quil actually laughed.

"I don't blame you," he said. "Six months of Bella is enough to make anyone turn to dick!"

Much to my relief, as the rest of our friends and neighbours on the Reservation got to know about me, no one gave me any trouble, not even Brady's Dad who was completely cool with having a gay son and was happy for me to spend time at their house whenever I wanted. It made me wonder what my Dad would have thought about it. He had been gone almost four years now, but I guessed he would have supported me. He had always told me that whatever decisions I made for myself, he would stand behind and that he loved me dearly. I was sure he would have been happy for me and that he would have liked Brady.

Things continued to go well between us. We talked about anything and everything, we spent every available minute together and I knew I loved him, but there was always something that was never quite right. At first we couldn't keep our hands off of each other, but as time went on, days would go by or even a week or more before we would have sex and when I thought about it I realised there was something missing for me and I wondered if it was the same for him. He was more like my best friend than my lover; we rarely disagreed on anything and we certainly never fought, but there really wasn't much passion there either. I didn't want to break up with him, but at the same time I wanted something more ___exciting._

"Jake? What's the matter with you? You're miles away."

It was Seth's voice and I looked up from the car I was working on. I certainly wasn't going to tell him what I was thinking; it would put him in an awkward position.

"Oh, nothing important," I shrugged. "What are you doing over here?"

"I split with Dave," he said, mentioning a guy he had been seeing for the past few weeks.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be, he was a jerk. Have you heard the news? About Bella?"

"No, it's hardly something I listen out for," I said. The last I'd heard she'd got Edward Cullen to move into her Dad's old house with her. Charlie had been shot and killed on duty about a year before I started seeing her and I always thought he was probably turning in his grave over her antics.

"They're getting married, there was a big announcement in the paper and I got an invite."

___"You_got an invite?" I said in surprise.

"Yeah, Jasper sent one."

"Well, don't ask me to be your plus one," I joked.

"I already asked Embry. I don't even want to go really, but I guess I'm curious. They're having it at the All Saints Chapel in Forks on Saturday."

"Sounds a bit low key for her," I grunted. "All that money the Cullens have, I'm surprised she didn't make more of it."

"The honeymoon is a month in the Seychelles," Seth said wrily.

I couldn't help thinking that they were going at it in a rush, but that was most likely Bella's doing. Once the ring was on her finger, she'd be certain of getting anything she wanted and if she got sick of him, she'd get a good settlement no doubt. I quickly put it out of my mind again until Embry came over Saturday afternoon, still in the suit he wore for the wedding and I realised I was probably going to hear the details whether I wanted to or not.

"Wait until you hear this!" he exclaimed, grinning.

"Em, I'm not interested in hearing about the wedding, ok?" I sighed, passing him a beer.

"You will be."

"Embry..."

"It didn't happen," he said smugly.

"What?"

"She left him at the altar! Never showed, never even sent a message. The guy looked like he wanted to die, I mean seriously. I thought he was going to have a heart attack or something right there in front of everyone; he almost collapsed and the doctor and Emmett practically had to carry him to the car and take him away. God, Jake, you'd have loved it."

I couldn't say that I loved hearing this - if anything I was shocked that even Bella would take it as far as the altar before ditching him.

"Shit," I said. "No one deserves that."

"I thought you'd have been pleased; I mean, he took her away from you."

"No, he didn't, she walked and now she's done it again. I'm hardly going to gloat."

"Well, I thought it was funny," Embry said. "Anyway..." He went on to tell me about the reactions of various people, while I grunted responses every so often. He quickly became bored and said he was heading over to see Quil next to tell him the gossip. I finished my beer, grabbed another and called Brady to find out when he was coming over. As was usual for a Saturday, he stayed over and spent most of Sunday with me.

It was the Thursday after this that I got an idea of why the wedding hadn't happened. I had been into Forks to the warehouse again and then to a grocery store. Opposite was a fashion boutique and parked at the kerb I spotted a Ferrari F40 - not something that was common in Forks, or even in this area of Washington - and I took a second look; anyone would have. As I looked, Bella and a guy stepped out of the boutique and the guy pulled open the passenger door and held it while Bella slid in, carefully folding the umbrella which was protecting her from the current downpour. I frowned and took another look. The guy was tall, dark-haired and even with a long raincoat on it was fairly apparent that he was well-built with muscle. So that was why Edward Cullen had been jilted, I mused. Just as much money as the Cullens and hot with it. No way would Bella settle for one of the above if she could have both. I watched as Mr Ferrari slid into the driver's seat and gunned the engine and then got back to what I was doing, eating a sandwich in the truck before heading back to La Push.

The rain was so heavy I could barely see where I was going, even with the windshield wipers going full speed. I slowed to about twenty and ploughed on. The cliff road could be treacherous in bad weather and some fools still drove around it like they were on a race track. More than once I had come upon someone heading towards me on my side of the road and that had been on a dry day.

I rounded the bend to the point where Embry and me and the others used to cliff dive from when we were kids, albeit lower down and my foot touched the brake as I spotted a figure standing there, wearing nothing but shirt and pants which were plastered to his or her body as the rain pounded on their unprotected head. As I drew closer, the person stepped over the barrier towards the edge and I swore under my breath. A jumper. You heard about one every so often in the newspaper – some poor sucker thinking they had no choice but to hurl themselves off the edge into oblivion.

"Fuck," I muttered, halting the truck on the shoulder. I couldn't just drive by and ignore it; my conscience wouldn't allow it. Zipping up my waterproof jacket and pulling the hood over my head, I shoved the door open and stepped out into the deluge. Immediately my pants legs were soaked and I scowled as I slammed the door of the truck again and sprinted towards the barrier.

"Hey!" The wind and rain whipped my voice away and he didn't hear me. It was a guy, I realised now. About my height, skinny, short hair, shoulders slumped dejectedly.

_"____Hey!"_I reached the barrier and leaned on it, reluctant to actually step over onto the three or four foot wide strip of slippery, muddy ground.

"Leave me alone! Go about your business!"

He glanced sideways a fraction before turning back to face the sea and I frowned and squeezed my eyes shut against the rain for a second. Edward fucking Cullen. Why had I stopped the truck again?

I stared at him for a few seconds, soaked and shivering, arms folded around himself, head down. An enormous diamond sparkled on his pinky finger and I guessed it must have been the ring he gave Bella. I was a little surprised she had given it back. I stepped over the barrier and halted perhaps three feet from him; almost within reach.

"She's not worth it," I said. Embry had told me that exact same thing not too long ago, although I worked it out for myself pretty fast.

"Stay away from me." He sounded hoarse, as if he'd spent the last week crying, which he probably had. He took a step closer to the edge and looked down.

"Jesus, step back, Edward, come on," I told him.

"What do you care what I do?"

"I don't, but I've been where you are now, remember? Almost."

"And now you're going to say 'I told you so'. You did warn me."

"No, I'm going to say throwing your life away for someone like her is a huge waste. It hurts now, but you'll get over it." I sounded sympathetic, friendly even, and I asked myself again why in hell I was trying to help him. Probably because I always helped any waif and stray, regardless of what they might or might not have done.

"Leave me alone, Jacob!" he cried now, stepping sideways away from me although his head was turned, his eyes fixed on me.

"No, I won't. If I'd been stupid enough to do this when she left me for you, I would have hoped someone would have stopped me making the biggest mistake of my life."

"You don't know anything about me!"

"I know you'll look back on this day some time soon and know you were a dick. Come here."

I reached out to grab at him and he jerked back. His feet slipped in the mud and began to shoot out from under him, almost in slow motion. I launched myself sideways in a rugby tackle type move, throwing my arm around his waist as we crashed to the ground inches from the cliff edge, then rolled over twice in the direction of the barrier and pinned him there while he struggled and yelled and tried to punch me.

"Let go of me! I didn't ask you to do that! This would all have been over if you just minded your own business! Let me go!" He thrust his hands against my chest and tried to force me to break my grip, but I held on.

"Stop it, for God's sake! You're not going over there, not today. Hold still, damnit!"

He didn't and one of his smart and now ruined dress shoes caught me in the shin, making me flinch. I did the only thing I could think of to stop him; I took one hand off him, clenched my fist and slammed it into his jaw. It wasn't that hard of a punch. Lying half on top of him, trying to stop him getting away from me and almost choking on the rain and mud, I couldn't get much momentum going, but it was enough to shock him out of his hysterics. He lay still and quiet for a brief moment, then put his hands over his face and began to cry.

"What did I do wrong? Why did she do this to me?" he spluttered.

"Because she's a bitch and she does this. I doubt you did anything. I sure as hell didn't. Come on, let's get out of this rain." I lurched to my feet and pulled him up. His hand was ice cold and his legs threatened to give way beneath him. I drew his arm around my neck, gripping it by the wrist and slung my arm around his waist, practically dragging him over the barrier to the waiting truck. I pulled open the passenger door.

"Get in."

"I'll make your seat wet," he sobbed.

"So will I. Get in."

He climbed up onto the seat and I slammed the door closed and ran around the other side. I dived into the vehicle and closed the door, then quickly took the waterproof jacket off. My upper half was only damp underneath, which was surprising as I had been practically rolling around in a muddy river. I turned the engine on and cranked up the heating, then grabbed the rug I kept behind the seats.

"Get that shirt off."

"What?" He cleared his throat and scrubbed both hands over his face.

"Take your shirt off before you catch your death." I bit my lip to hide a smirk at the irony of the words and watched as Edward fumbled with numb fingers at the fancy buttons on the expensive-looking shirt he was wearing.

"Jesus." I leaned across, grasped the fronts of the garment and yanked them apart, sending buttons flying everywhere. I grimaced at the way he looked. It had been obvious he was thin, but with the shirt off I could see virtually every rib pushing against his skin. He looked like he hadn't eaten for weeks.

"Hey, this is Armani!" he protested now.

"You almost end your life and suddenly you care about a damned shirt? Take it off."

He slid his arms out of the sodden piece of clothing and dropped it onto the floor at his feet. He was shivering violently and I shook the folds out of the rug and draped it around him, then slid back behind the wheel and began to drive. I was going to have to take a detour now, into the woods where the Cullens lived.

"I'm sorry," Edward said in a whisper, his teeth chattering.

"What for?"

"Dragging you into this." He sniffed hard and when I glanced at him briefly I noticed a tear spill down his cheek, quickly followed by another. He turned his head away and looked out of the window.

"Forget it. Just don't do it again and show me I wasted my time."

"I won't."

He didn't say anything else and nor did I. I simply drove to his house while he sat there with silent tears rolling down his face. When I parked up, two faces appeared at one of the windows and then Emmett Cullen burst out into the rain. He pulled open Edward's door and stared at him and then me in shock.

"What happened?"

"He was going to jump off the cliff," I said.

Edward moaned and hung his head.

"You helped him?" Emmett's eyes widened.

"Yeah. It was nothing."

"You know it wasn't nothing. Thanks, Jacob." He nodded at me, then wrapped the rug more tightly around Edward and hauled him out into the rain. Jasper opened the door again and drew Edward inside. A moment later Emmett ran back to me with the rug, pulling the truck door open to drop it in the footwell.

"Thanks," he said again and slammed the door. I started the engine, turned the truck around on the driveway and drove home.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you to everyone for reading and reviewing - happy to hear you're still enjoying the story :o)**

CHAPTER THREE

**Edward's POV**

I was shaking from head to foot from the cold and my emotions and I would have collapsed on the doormat if Emmett hadn't suddenly gathered me up into his arms. I realised that somehow I was wrapped in his ski jacket and supposed Jasper must have put it on me when Emmett took Jacob his rug back.

"Wh-where's M-Mom?" I stammered. My teeth were chattering violently and I could barely feel my hands.

"At work, she got called in for an extra shift. Jas, make some hot chocolate or something," Emmett said and began to head upstairs, carrying me as if I weighed no more than a child.

I still had tears rolling down my face and I struggled to suppress them, feeling like a fool. Emmett would think I was stupid and I hated looking that way in front of him. He sat me down on the toilet seat in my bathroom and turned the hot water on to fill the bath. Then he turned back to me and kneeled on the mat, beginning to untie my ruined shoes. I wanted to tell him to leave me alone, that I would do it myself, but I knew my numb hands wouldn't have been capable of much. I looked down at them and realised that the ring had gone from my finger - I must have lost it in the struggle with Jacob. I flinched slightly. It wasn't that the diamond held good memories for me - far from it - but I could just imagine what Dad would say if he found out I lost it.

_'Edward, your grandfather didn't become wealthy by throwing away four thousand dollars as if it were nothing. When are you going to learn the value of things?'_

I put it out of my mind for the present and was instantly reminded that Jacob had told Emmett what I tried to do and I could only imagine what he was thinking - weak, pathetic Edward. I shuddered and closed my eyes as he pulled the ski jacket off me again. Oh, God - Jacob Black. He was probably already with his friends, telling them all how ridiculous I was, laughing about what I'd come to after I'd actually gloated that I took Bella away from him. I put my hands over my face with a groan.

Emmett was urging me to my feet so he could get my pants off and I obeyed him like a small helpless child, my eyes still squeezed shut until I heard my brother's shocked gasp.

"Fucking Christ, Edward, what the hell have you done to yourself?"

"I've been sick." I reluctantly opened my eyes as he gripped my shoulders. "I'm alright."

"You're not alright, Edward, you're half starved!"

To my horror, Emmett turned me around until I faced the full length mirror in the corner, something I had avoided looking in for quite a while. I knew what I looked like, but now Emmett was forcing me to face it and I reluctantly met the eyes of my reflection and cringed. My skin was pale - I had always been pale, I wasn't much of a sun-worshipper, which was probably just as well living in Forks; Emmett got his tan from a sunbed - but now my skin looked almost translucent, the veins visible in places. My arms and legs were so thin they looked as if they would snap with a little effort and my shoulder and hip bones and my ribs pushed against the skin which seemed to be stretched thinly over them with very little flesh in between. It was no surprise Bella hadn't wanted me and yet it had been her who started the whole stupid thing.

_"Edward, you need to lose a few pounds, you're getting quite a paunch, it's really not attractive."_

I hadn't thought that was the case at the time, but she made me feel unattractive and I ate less. Somehow it had gotten to be a habit until I could barely stomach a child's portion of food at a time and I slowly lost more and more weight. Although Mom had commented that I looked too thin when I came home, no one had picked up on my eating habits since the family rarely ate together and if I skipped a meal or several, no one noticed. In addition during the few months I had lived with Bella, my family had barely seen me.

"I told you, I've been sick," I repeated.

"Sick! Fucking hell, Edward, wait until Mom and Dad see you!" Emmett shook his head and steered me towards the bath. His shocked look had been replaced by one of sadness. "What the fuck did that bitch do to you? And how did we not even notice this last week?"

"Emmett, I don't want to talk about it, please," I begged.

"Fine. You know I'm shit at this stuff anyway. You can talk to Mom." He helped me into the bath and I lowered myself slowly into the scalding water. "Sorry if I sound...like I usually sound, I'm just...I'm upset," he said awkwardly. "You're my little brother, I hate seeing you hurt."

"I'll be ok," I said faintly.

Emmett went to the door as Jasper appeared, but much to my relief sent him away again. He sat back down on the mat beside the bath and passed me a steaming mug of hot chocolate with cream and chocolate sprinkles, just like Mom always made us when we were kids. I sipped it and felt the heat of it warming my insides while the bath water heated me from the outside. The last few days since what should have been my wedding had seemed to pass by without me realising it and I could scarcely believe I was actually back home. I should have been relieved that it was all over, but since Dad and Emmett brought me back in the limo, all everyone had done was talk at me as if they thought it would take my mind off things. All I wanted was to be left alone and I sure as hell didn't want to talk about how I felt. That was the worst thing about Mom being a shrink - she thought she could help, that making me think and talk would help, when really I just wanted to forget it all. Like that was going to be possible now. What a fucking idiot I was. I failed at everything - even killing myself. Damn Jacob Black for turning up right then; I wished he had just driven by.

"...heard his car," Emmett was saying.

"What?"

"I said I think Dad's back." He got to his feet.

"Oh God, don't tell him about this, please," I groaned.

"Edward, there is no way we're covering this up. You need some help. It's not just about the fact that you almost threw yourself off the cliff; you're not eating either and you're going to end up really sick. I know that bitch broke your heart with what she did, but it's not worth all of this."

"Emmett, don't," I protested. "I'll be fine now I'm home."

He ignored me, opened the door and set off downstairs. Shit. I moved quickly, scrambling out of the bath, throwing one towel over the mirror and using another to dry myself off as fast as I could manage before I dragged on shorts, loose fitting jeans and two sweaters. By the time Dad appeared I was sitting on my bed with my laptop resting on my legs. He closed the door and sat on the end of the bed, talking about how hurt I must be over being jilted and how I would move on from it if I gave myself time and how it wasn't worth throwing my life away for and that I needed to start taking better care of myself. I listened and nodded and grunted when appropriate, but mostly I tried to tune his voice out. I didn't want to hear it. That was all everybody thought. Bella left me at the altar and my heart was broken. Me collapsing afterwards had apparently confirmed that and sure, I'd been shocked to the point of my legs giving way, but part of that had been relief. I considered telling Dad that for about a minute, but if I did that I would have to tell him everything else and I didn't even want to think about most of it; I was too ashamed. I wondered if Jacob Black had felt like this too. Probably not - he hadn't even lived with her and he was a lot tougher than me. He was a man and I was a stupid weak boy who hadn't known any better.

Dad left me alone eventually and when Mom came home, it was her turn to try talking to me in the same way she talked to her patients. She told me she had arranged to take two weeks' leave from work to look after me and that from now on, she and Emmett and Jasper would all be eating at the table with me three times a day. She was horrified that I appeared to be in such a bad way and told me she felt terrible that she had been too preoccupied to really notice. I protested that I needed some time to myself, but it was clear I wasn't going to get it. The whole family seemed convinced I was only waiting for another opportunity to 'do something silly' and that plenty of decent meals and love and attention was all I needed.

Every time Mom talked to me, I told her what I thought she wanted to hear. I let her go on thinking that my love for Bella and her ultimate rejection was responsible for my behaviour and three times a day I sat at the dining table with the others, occasionally with Dad as well when he was home and shoved the food around my plate, forcing some of it down my neck and grimacing with every bite. Even the small portions I was given were a struggle to swallow and the sight of the mountain of food on Emmett's plate only made me feel sick.

I learned that Dad had called Jacob to thank him for coming to my aid and in addition, promised to send all of the family cars to him for servicing in the future. The thought of the pair of them talking about me was mortifying and I dreaded the day when my Volvo may need work doing, forcing me to face Jacob again.

Ten days later I dared to glance at myself in my bathroom mirror again and discovered that there was already a surprising difference. I was definitely filling out, my bones no longer looking as if they were trying to cut through my skin and I didn't know how to feel about it. I was so used to seeing myself in a certain way that the change alarmed me. My parents and brothers were organising everything and I felt like I was being bulldozed, losing control of myself all over again. The biggest decision I seemed to be making was what to wear each day and the longer it went on, the more I withdrew into myself in an attempt to escape it.

The following morning I rose early - even before Emmett who was always in the gym by seven - and crept down there in sweats and a t-shirt. Damned if I was going to let them bully me. Much more of this and that ugly paunch would be back and no one would ever want me again, although it was highly unlikely they would anyway. Many of the things Bella had said to me continued to replay in my mind over and over, but one was more prominent than the others.

_'You should think yourself lucky that you have me, Edward, no one else in their right mind would ever look twice at you.'_

"Leave me alone," I muttered aloud. I switched on the treadmill, warmed up with a gentle jog and then increased the speed. I was probably the least fit person I knew and even eleven minutes per mile was hard work for me, but I ploughed on, gasping and sweating, clinging to the support bar in front of me until I physically could not run another step.

I continued this for the next couple of weeks without being found out and it seemed to be the ideal solution. Running daily prevented any more weight gain, but at the same time I developed an appetite and was able to eat with more enthusiasm, which in turn kept everybody else happy. Mom had gone back to work now, but Emmett and Jasper continued insisting on meals being eaten together at the table. I felt better for the first time since the wedding - I was in control of things again. I was in control of _me _and I remained so right up until the day Emmett had a fight with Rosalie. He stormed home one evening, slammed into his room and presumably tossed and turned all night. So when I was pounding the treadmill in the morning and Emmett was restless and in a temper, the first thing he did was come down to the gym to take it out on the punchbag. I wasn't even aware he had come in until he spoke, or rather yelled.

"Edward, what the fuck do you think you're doing?"

I stumbled and almost flew off of the back of the treadmill, only just managing to save myself and lift my feet up onto the stationery edges while I turned the machine off. I stepped down and turned to face Emmett, who was glowering.

"No wonder you stopped putting weight on; Dad was starting to think you must have something wrong with you."

"There's nothing wrong with me other than all of you bullying me," I said. "I'm sick of it and I don't want to get fat again."

"Fat? You've never been fat, Edward, don't be ridiculous," Emmett said. "As for us bullying you - we're trying to help you. Hasn't it ever occurred to you that we might be worrying about you? That we want to take care of you?"

"I can take care of myself! I'm not a child! I wish you'd just all leave me the hell alone!" I shouted at him and ran from the gym and up to my room.

I slammed the door and locked it before heading into the shower, scrubbing myself vigorously and muttering under my breath the whole time about my interfering family not giving a damn about how I felt and how I knew what was best for me. By the time I was dried and dressed Mom was knocking on the door, calling out worriedly that Emmett had told her what I'd been doing and she needed to talk to me. I grabbed my wallet and car keys, purposefully leaving my cellphone turned off on the bed table, pulled on a coat and opened the door.

"Edward, where are you going?" Mom protested as I stepped past her and jogged down the stairs.

"Out!"

"Jesus, Edward, what's the rush?" Jasper grabbed my arm and halted me before I got to the door. "What's going on anyway?"

"Leave me alone, Jasper," I told him.

"Where are you going?"

"Just leave me alone, I want some time on my own _for once!"_ I cried, shoving him hard in the chest. He let go of me suddenly and I jerked the door open. In less than a minute I was in my car heading down the driveway, watching Jasper and Emmett in my mirror as they stood on the porch watching me. I pressed my foot harder on the gas and sped towards the end of the drive. Finally I had my own space, for the first time in more than three weeks.

I headed into Forks. I didn't have any idea what I would do, but just escaping from Mom and Emmett and Jasper's constant 'helping' was a relief. I parked up in a lot close to the centre of town and began to wander about, window-shopping outside stores not yet open and quickly beginning to feel guilty that they were probably all worrying about me now and thinking I might do something to myself. Consequently my guilt only grew and spoiled what I had intended to be a couple of hours just enjoying my own space. Eventually I went back to the car and reluctantly began to head home, driving slowly and thinking about the third degree I would have to face when I got in.

I was brought out of my thoughts when the steering wheel began to shake suddenly in my hands and the car pulled to the left, attempting to cross the centre line of the cliff road. The whole vehicle started to feel sluggish and I fought to pull it back into line, touching the brake gently. Damnit - a flat. I muttered and cursed, guiding the car to the shoulder where I stopped and got out, looking in dismay at the front tyre which was almost off the rim. I had never changed a wheel in my life, but it looked like I was going to have to do it now. Stupid jerk Edward, leaving my phone at home. Well, how hard could it be? Unscrew the wheel, take it off, put the spare on. Even I couldn't fuck that up. Where's the spare?

I unlocked the trunk and looked inside. It had to be in there, right? The trunk of course, appeared empty except for the can of oil, bottle of water and rug I always kept in there. It took me a couple more minutes to figure out the wheel had to be underneath the carpet and then another ten minutes to get it out of the car and find the jack and the tyre iron. I knew in theory what to do, I'd just never done it in practise. I slid the jack beneath the car, just as a red truck pulled over and halted behind me. The very same red truck I had travelled home in after Jacob Black stopped me going over the cliff. Oh shit. It would be him. Out of everyone who could have driven past and seen me in this predicament, it had to be him.

"Need some help?" He halted a couple of feet from me. I could see his boots from the corner of my eye as I crouched on the ground with the jack and I didn't look up. I could feel my face turning red.

"No, I'm fine," I said quickly. "Thanks."

"Suit yourself." He backed off a couple of steps and I continued with what I was doing, well aware he was still watching. I pumped up the jack a little way and heard an alarming creaking noise. Hell, it was probably in the wrong place and about to break something. Completely mortified, I sat back on my heels.

"Jacob?"

"Yeah."

I got to my feet, hating to look at him. What must he be thinking? Useless Cullen, can't even change a wheel.

"I'm sorry, I just..." Be honest, I told myself. He offered to help, didn't he? "I'm embarrassed," I confessed. "You saw me at the lowest point I've ever been. I feel pretty ridiculous now."

"There's no need. I've been there remember - almost. I didn't try and throw myself off of a cliff, but I might have felt like it once or twice," he said easily. "And in case you're wondering, I didn't tell anyone. Are you ok now?"

"Yes," I lied.

"Good. So let's take a look at this."

I watched as Jacob removed the jack, grabbed the tyre iron and loosened the wheel nuts, making it look easy although his arm muscles bulged under the long sleeved t-shirt he was wearing. Once this was done he positioned the jack in a completely different place to where I had put it, raised the car and then finished unscrewing the wheel. In ten more minutes the spare was on, the jack removed and he was just tightening up the last nut. He put the original wheel in the trunk along with the tools and slammed the lid down. I pulled my wallet out quickly.

"Um...thanks, I really appreciate it. How much do I owe you?"

"Nothing, Edward, it was just changing a wheel, forget it," he said.

"Oh, but..."

"Put your money away. Your father sends me plenty of business."

"Ok." I put my wallet away again. "Well, thank you, for stopping."

"No problem." He gave me a slight smile, returned to his truck and a moment later he was gone.

I got back in the Volvo and sat staring at the steering wheel for a minute. I was still embarrassed that he had to come along and see how useless I was after he had already caught me about to finish myself off. He had said he didn't tell anyone what happened and that puzzled me. Somehow I had imagined him and his friends laughing and joking about me, gloating that the fool who took Bella from him had ended up jilted and suicidal. I grimaced, but I still wished he had let me pay for changing the wheel. Maybe I could repay him in some other way, for both that and for being discreet.

I drove home slowly and as predicted, had to face Mom, Emmett and Jasper worrying and demanding to know what I was thinking, trying to undo all the good work and then taking off without a word. As usual I said what I thought would appease them and promised to stay out of the gym in the future. Emmett took to locking it at night just in case, which basically said they didn't trust me and only made me feel more resentful. However, I had something else to do which I decided to concentrate on instead.

Two days later on Sunday afternoon, I found myself driving over to the La Push Reservation, a six-pack of Budweiser on the seat beside me, coming up with a dozen reasons in my head why it was a bad idea, the main one being that Jacob would think I was a jerk, but I still wanted to say thanks for helping me out so I went on with it anyway, my sweaty hands slipping on the steering wheel and my mouth dry as I went over in my head what I would say. A year ago it would have been easy - 'thanks for helping me out the other day, I appreciate it.' Simple. But a lot had happened in the last year, mostly my confidence completely deserting me.

Twice I slowed the car and almost turned around and went home, but suddenly I was in front of the garage, perhaps fifty yards from his house and it was too late to change my mind. If he was home he probably saw me out the window. I hesitated another minute, then grabbed the beers, got out of the car and walked up to the house, knocking quickly and then holding my breath. What the hell was I doing? Oh shit, what if he thought I was hitting on him? I almost turned tail and ran at the thought, but then the door opened and he was right in front of me, a surprised look on his face.

"Edward."

"Hello." I licked my dry lips. "I...um...I felt guilty that you wouldn't take any money for fixing my car the other day. I thought maybe...I don't know if you drink beer, but..." I stammered.

Jacob grinned. "It's my favourite brand." He reached out and took the six-pack from me. "Thanks, but you really didn't have to."

"Well, I wanted to. To say thanks." I heaved a sigh of relief. Job done. Now I could go home and...

"Do you want to come in and have one of these?"

"Sure," I heard myself say after a brief hesitation. "Ok." I stepped into the house, closed the door and followed him down the hall and into a lounge. I hovered until he waved me towards the sofa and passed me a beer before throwing himself into an armchair and sticking his feet up on the coffee table, boots and all. I gazed around the large room, taking in plain cream coloured walls, brown carpet, dark wood, a large television set, pictures on the walls of cars and motorcycles and a cabinet with several family photographs on it. One showed Jacob several years younger, his hair long, with a man who was clearly his father. Another showed the father as a young man with a pretty pregnant woman in his arms and yet another showed Jacob as he was now, a close-up of his face probably taken with a cellphone, a young shaggy-haired guy kissing him on the cheek and grinning. My eyes widened and I realised Jacob was watching me look at the photos. My face heated up as he smirked at me.

"That's Brady," he said and laughed. "After Bella, I guess I had enough of women."

"So you're gay? Just like that?" I blurted.

"Not exactly. I guess I was always curious."

"My brother Jasper's gay," I said. "You probably know that. How did you meet...Brady?"

"I just ran into him one day - I mean, literally, I hit his car with my truck," he laughed. "I repaired his car and the rest, as they say, is history." He grimaced slightly now. "It kind of works."

"You don't sound so sure," I said boldly, surprised that it was so easy to talk to him.

He shrugged. "I don't know, I guess I expected something more out of it. What about you? Don't suppose you'll be seeing anyone else yet."

"No, definitely not."

Somehow I managed to spend an hour talking to him and drink two of the beers before I suggested it was time I took off. It was the first time in weeks I had felt relaxed, like I wasn't being judged or scrutinised, but I didn't want to outstay my welcome. As it was, I ended up hanging around the shop for another half hour while Jacob put a new tyre on my wheel and switched it for the spare, telling me he would add it to the next invoice he sent to my Dad.

"Where have you been, Edward?" Mom asked the minute I walked into the kitchen. She was making dinner and now turned to look at me rather anxiously.

"I just went to get Jacob Black to put a new tyre on my car, I got a flat," I said.

"Oh!"

"What's for dinner?" I asked to prevent her quizzing me any more about what had obviously given her a surprise. I was surprised myself, that something as simple as sharing a beer with someone I scarcely knew could have made me feel so much better.


	4. Chapter 4

**As always, thank you to everyone who reviewed, saved an alert, or simply read and enjoyed the story :o)**

CHAPTER FOUR

**Jacob's POV**

Edward Cullen turning up at my door with beer had been pretty surprising. He had looked as if he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him when I stopped to change his tyre, which I suppose I could understand. I wouldn't have wanted to run into the guy who prevented me from doing myself in either, if I could avoid it. In addition he was completely clueless about the car and if I hadn't have stopped, his father would have been sending the thing to me with wrecked brake pipes. Even though he said he wanted to say thanks properly for helping, it was still a surprise that he wanted to stay and talk. I figured he probably didn't have many friends, if any, after spending months in Bella's clutches and his family were probably keeping him under lock and key too in case he decided to jump in front of a bus or something.

I remembered Edward had also pointed out he wasn't seeing anyone else and had no intention of doing so in the foreseeable future, so I was fairly astounded to see him in Finley's Bar two weeks later on Friday night. I was in there to meet Brady after he finished work, although when he sent me a text at eight to tell me he was working late and wasn't sure how long he would be, it didn't really surprise me. He had been weird as hell the last few days, awkward like he wanted to be anywhere else but with me. I sighed heavily and tapped a response into my phone.

'Staying for a beer, may see you later.'

I wondered how much longer we would go on like this. I don't know why I didn't just suggest we talk about it. We still got on amazingly well and I loved being with him, but when was the last time I slept with him? When was the last time we said 'I love you' to each other? I could scarcely remember.

I ordered myself a beer and glanced around me as I waited for the barmaid to bring it to me. The place was maybe half full and much to my surprise I spotted Edward Cullen sitting alone in a corner, a glass of something that looked suspiciously like coke in front of him. In addition, he looked nervous as hell as if he would jump up and run for the hills if anyone spoke to him. I shook my head. He was definitely in the wrong place if he was hoping to meet the sort of girl I imagined would interest him and just seconds later a blond guy in leather pants and a wife-beater dropped onto the bench nearby and leaned towards him. His eyes widened and he chewed his lip, shaking his head. The blond guy laughed and leaned back against the wall, apparently going nowhere. Edward edged away a few inches and fidgeted uncomfortably.

"Damn that guy," I said under my breath as the barmaid returned with a bottle of Bud. This was the third time I was about to step in and save him from some misfortune, only this time I was slightly less reluctant, just resigned. He really was asking for trouble, sitting there all dressed up in his designer clothes, looking astonishingly pretty without his usual geeky glasses. "Make that two, sweetheart," I said and the girl grabbed a second bottle and passed it to me, taking the bill from my hand. "Keep the change."

I grabbed the bottles in one hand and made my way over to Edward. The blond guy was leaning towards him again, grinning. I fixed a smile on my own face, strode over to the table and sat down beside Edward, snaking my arm around him and tugging him in close to my side. He was still horribly thin, I noticed; I could feel his ribs under my hand and I remembered how awful he had looked when I tore off his wet shirt - like he hadn't eaten a decent meal in months. I wondered if he was sick with something. He stiffened now and shivered slightly.

"Babe, I can't leave you alone for a minute without guys coming after you," I said and turned my head to press my lips to his ear. "Play along."

He relaxed a fraction and angled his head towards me, brushing trembling lips lightly against my jaw. I pulled my head back and sent the blond guy an evil look. "Back off, buddy, he's taken."

"Yeah, I get it, sorry." With an apologetic smile he got to his feet and walked off.

"Thanks," Edward whispered, flushing vividly. "What are you doing here?"

"Rescuing you by the look of it. Again."

"I'm sorry, I don't know why you bother." He dropped his eyes away from mine and shuffled away from me a few inches. I removed my arm which was still resting around him and laid it along the back of the seat instead, then passed him one of the beers. "Thank you," he said quietly.

"What are you doing in here, Edward?" I sighed.

"I was…I….um…I wanted to try and meet someone," he stammered.

"Trust me, this is not the place to do it. Most of the girls that come in here are tramps after a quick bit of fun and half of the guys are after someone that looks just like you."

Edward bit his lip and fiddled with the bottle in his hands. "I don't really know the best places to go."

"If you want to get picked up, any of the bars in Forks will do," I said. "But from the look of you, I doubt that's what you're looking for, is it? If you want a girlfriend, this isn't the way to go about it."

"Yeah, I know that now." He gave a small sheepish smile. "Are you…um…looking to meet someone? I thought you had a…um...you were seeing someone. Brady."

I snorted. "I am, Brady's working late, that's all, we were supposed to meet in here. I thought I may as well stay for at least one drink."

"I guess I'm lucky you did then." He raised the beer to his lips and took a mouthful.

My phone beeped and I pulled it out of my pocket to check the message. It was Brady again. 'Will try to get there in an hour or so.' I put the phone away again without answering.

"Was that him?" Edward asked.

"Yeah. Doubt he's going to get here tonight."

"I'm sorry."

I just shrugged.

"You're not bothered? Don't you love him?" blurted Edward.

I glanced at him and frowned slightly. The question surprised me and for a moment I didn't answer, obviously giving him time to worry he had pried too much.

"I'm sorry, that's none of my business," he added quickly.

"It's alright. I think we're actually close to breaking up," I admitted. "We don't fight or anything, it's just that we're more friends than anything else. Neither of us has got around to actually saying so, that's all. I should; I guess I was hoping he was gonna do it first."

"I'm sorry," Edward repeated.

"Don't be," I shrugged again. "I'm not miserable about it or anything."

I took a mouthful of my beer and studied him for a moment. The fact that I was sitting in a bar sharing a beer with him seemed pretty bizarre and I found that I didn't actually mind his company. He had seemed shy and uncomfortable when he came over to my house with the beers, but not so much now. I took in the expensive-looking plain black pants and shirt he was wearing, a TAG Heuer watch on his left wrist; it was no surprise really that Bella had gone after him, he had money dripping off of him. I glanced up at his usually wild bronze hair, which he had somehow managed to tame today. Deep green eyes looked back at me suddenly and he flushed again and looked down. Shit. He was actually a really attractive guy and I probably just made it obvious I was appraising him. I drained my beer and put the empty bottle on the table.

"Do you want another?"

"Um..." He looked at his bottle which was still half full, then quickly gulped the contents. "Yes, please."

I smirked and got up to return to the bar. I bought four beers while I was there and placed two in front of Edward when I sat back down beside him. I might as well make the most of the few drinks and a little conversation, I thought, since I had been stood up.

Somehow a couple hours passed by and during that time Edward had made a trip to the bar for more beers. I had necked four or five by then and was feeling pleasantly warm and fuzzy, but Edward, who was clearly not a drinker, was tipsy and giggly and chattering about anything that came into his head with a slight slur to his voice. It made me laugh and I kept prompting him to continue talking with random questions. The current subject was what it was like growing up in the Cullen household with Jasper often as camp as custard - Edward's words - and Emmett taking charge of the two younger brothers in between pumping iron and gulping protein shakes like they were going out of fashion, trying to turn himself into the new Arnold Schwarzeneggar; Ed himself studying and poring over his computers like a geek. He painted an amusing picture and I was surprised to find he had such a sense of humour.

Grinning and reaching forward to place another empty bottle on the table, I was completely caught off guard when he leaned towards me. His lips seemed to bump against mine almost by accident and I had no time to respond or otherwise before he pulled his head back again.

"I didn't mean to do that." He dropped his eyes and giggled.

"Yeah, you did. What was it? An experiment?" I stared at him in surprise, wondering if he was just too drunk to really know what he was doing or whether he had been wondering if a guy would be a better option after Bella's antics. Whichever it was, I felt a slight flutter of excitement.

"I guess."

"Well, it wasn't much of one," I murmured.

I don't know what I was thinking. The time I had spent talking to him, listening to his voice and looking at his bronze hair and green eyes had me developing an attraction for him without even realising it and I imagined myself giving him a proper kiss. Would he freak out? It was him who started this after all, experiment or not. I raised my hand to cup his cheek, applying slight pressure to guide his mouth to mine. Our lips touched briefly and then I drew back a fraction and glanced at his face. His eyes were closed and his lips parted just enough to tempt me to close the gap between us again.

I traced the shape of his jaw with my fingertips and then slid them back into his hair as my mouth covered his a little more insistently, my lips drawing a tentative but warm response from him. I didn't deepen it, much as I longed to slide my tongue out to taste and explore. Instead my lips went on caressing his for several long moments before I turned my head to plant a gentle kiss on the corner of his mouth and drew back.

"How was that?" I whispered teasingly.

He bit his lip and avoided my eyes, but a shy smile played at the corners of his mouth. I stroked my thumb lightly across his cheek as I pulled my hand away. Hell, I thought. Could Edward Cullen possibly like guys? Or was it just the beer? Or maybe he was doing the same thing I had done post-Bella - throwing himself at the first person who showed the slightest interest in a desperate attempt to feel better about himself. Shit. Back off, Jacob.

"Would you like another beer?" he asked at that moment.

"Don't you think you've had enough?"

"Just one more won't hurt."

"Ok, sure, thanks," I agreed. "I'll fetch them." I got to my feet and absently took the ten dollar bill he held out towards me. When I returned with the beers, which I decided were going to be the last, I rested my arm along the back of the seat behind Edward again and he leaned back after a moment so that his head rested against my bicep.

"I'm sorry," he said suddenly.

"What for?" I thought he meant for kissing me for a moment, until he spoke again, slurring and staring down at the beer bottle in his hand.

"I don't know. Gloating over Bella. I was a jerk. And she was a bitch. It served me right."

"No, it didn't, Edward, no one deserves to be treated like shit by somebody they care for," I said. "I had a lucky escape. So did you."

"I know." He shivered. "She's so much older than me, I suppose I was flattered at first. I suppose I thought she actually wanted me. I know it was only the money. I mean, who would ever want me?"

"Don't say that," I frowned. "You just haven't met the right person yet. There's somebody out there for you who'll treat you nice."

"I doubt it."

"How old are you, Edward?" I asked him. I knew he was the youngest Cullen, but not by how much.

"Twenty."

"You've barely even started out in life yet," I murmured.

That evil bitch, Bella, I thought. She was twenty-five - almost twenty-six now - and she had treated this sweet innocent boy like shit just because he had money and she wanted that, but not him. I slid my arm off the back of the seat until it rested around his shoulders and drew him closer to me. He tucked his face into my neck and rested his hand on my chest and I just sat there holding him, neither of us saying anything, until he moved slightly and his lips brushed my jaw. I angled my head downwards and touched my lips to his for a brief second, but then pulled back. I was bristling over Bella's treatment of him and I didn't even know what went on really. I felt like I should take care of him, but kissing him when he was drunk and probably a little unaware of what he was doing wasn't really doing that. However, he was certainly better off with me than in the clutches of someone else who would just take advantage of him when he was vulnerable. I pushed him away from me gently, grasped his hand and stood up, pulling him to his feet.

"Where are we going?" he asked as I headed to the door, drawing him along with me.

"I'm gonna get you home."

"Uh…wait…um…Jacob, I don't…I can't…" His hand tugged on mine and he stopped right outside the door.

"What?" I turned to look at him and immediately noticed alarm in his eyes. I let go of his hand quickly and touched his shoulder instead. "Edward…I'm just going to put you in a cab, that's all," I said.

"Oh!" His eyes widened and his cheeks flushed.

"What did you think? I'd take you back to my place and pounce on you? It was just a kiss and we both had a few too many beers."

"I'm sorry, you must think I'm such an idiot," he said miserably, hanging his head and reddening more than ever.

"Of course I don't, I think you're inexperienced and you got a pretty bad kick in the teeth from someone who doesn't give a shit about anyone's feelings." My hand slid from his shoulder to the back of his neck and gave a light squeeze before I snatched it back. I had the oddest urge to protect him from everything, mostly himself. "Come on, there's a free cab." I crossed the sidewalk to the waiting car before anyone else could reach it and bent to speak to the driver, telling him where to find the Cullens' mansion. Edward appeared at my side a moment later and I pulled the rear door open, ushering him inside.

"Thank you," he said and I nodded and closed the door on him. He lowered the window quickly. "Don't you need a ride home?"

"No, I'm fine," I said, tapping the roof of the cab. It began to move forward and a moment later Edward was gone.

I went back into Finley's for one more beer and then found another cab for myself. I had taken the bus into Forks, assuming Brady and I would be drinking and now as I sat in the back of the car, I received another text from him.

'So sorry, only just got away. See you tomorrow.'

"Shit," I muttered aloud. Brady hadn't even crossed my mind when I had been kissing Edward and now that he did, I was filled with guilt. We might be close to breaking up, but that didn't mean it was ok for me to kiss someone else. I felt doubly guilty that I'd found that brief moment a hell of a lot more exciting than I would have done if it were Brady. My heart fluttered slightly even now and I scowled out of the window. Edward Cullen was the worst possible choice I could make, even if he really was interested in me.

I spent a restless night, mostly going over and over in my head what I was going to say to Brady and wondering if I should admit to having broken his trust. I didn't want to hurt him, but I didn't want to lie to him either. Since I was going to end it, I didn't have to add insult to injury by confessing. But if someone saw me...I should just tell him, I decided. It was the right thing to do.

The following morning I went into the garage early to finish up a job I had in and before I got started, Brady's Bug pulled up outside. My heart began to pound nervously and I put down the wrench I had just picked up. At least we could get this out of the way without me having to stress about it all morning.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey, Jacob." He stopped a few feet away, his hands in his pockets, looking about as miserable as I felt. "I'm sorry about last night. One of the sites we handle crashed and it was all hands on deck to get it back up and running for the company."

"It's ok," I said and took a deep breath. "We need to talk."

"Yes, I know," he sighed. "Can I go first?"

Delaying the inevitable was at least a small relief and I pushed away the sudden image of me kissing Edward that filled my head and nodded.

"I think we should break up," he blurted and then continued in rush. "It's just like we're friends rather than anything else. I did something really shitty too and I've been trying to tell you for a week and haven't had the guts. I kissed this guy at work, Jacob, I'm so sorry, I..."

"Woah, stop," I interrupted, stepping forward and touching his arm.

"I'm sorry," he groaned again, avoiding my eyes.

"Brady, I agree with what you said, it is like we're just good friends and I've been meaning to say something about it for a while."

"You don't sound mad. I mean, about the guy," he said hopefully.

"I'm not. Last night I kissed someone too. I had a few beers, but that's no excuse."

Brady smiled now. "Is it a he or a she?"

"A he. Do you really think I'd consider another girl after that witch, Bella?"

"Huh...no," he snorted. "Ok, so what now?"

"I think we are officially over and just good friends. So who's this guy at work then?"

"He's the new graphics guy. Cocky as hell, already been in trouble twice for his attitude, but I don't know, he's hot and fun. I don't know if it'll go anywhere, but I'm kind of hoping, now I'm free to pursue it. What about you?"

"I don't think you know him," I said. "I don't know if it's anything either. He just got over a bad break-up with his first girlfriend and he was experimenting."

"A heartbroken straight boy? You don't make things easy for yourself, do you?" Brady grinned. "So what's his name? Is he from the Res?"

"No, he's a white boy. Like I said, though, I doubt anything will come of it. I'm pretty sure he's doing the same thing I did after Bella - throwing myself at the first person I could find."

"He's Bella's ex? That Cullen kid?" Brady's eyes widened. "Better watch your step there or the doc'll be after you." He smirked. "I do know of him, he's a web designer too, isn't he? Just on a smaller scale than my company."

"Yeah."

"You seem to have a thing for geeks." He grinned wider at me. "I'm gonna go. I was thinking of calling the guy from work."

"Be careful," I said. "Getting it on with someone you work with might be risky."

Brady shrugged. "If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. I want to give it a try."

He left a moment later and I heaved a huge sigh of relief. That had turned out pretty well and I had to smile when I thought of Brady doing the same thing I had been doing - worrying about doing the breaking up and having to confess he kissed someone else. Immediately I thought of Edward again and wondered what he was thinking this morning. Was he red-faced and hoping he would never have to see me again, or was he filled with butterflies and hoping I might want to see him again? I reminded myself that he was exactly where I had been a few months ago, only in an even worse place. The last thing he needed was a relationship of any kind and he didn't seem like a one-night-stand kind of guy. In fact if he hadn't actually been living with Bella, I wouldn't have been surprised to hear he was completely innocent. He had that shy awkwardness of someone who hadn't gone much further than a few kisses, or maybe that was just because he'd never been with a guy.

I picked up the wrench again and got on with the job I had to finish, but I found I couldn't stop thinking about him. Despite what I had said, I could just imagine him going off to another bar or equally unsuitable place and finding himself in a sticky situation like with the blond guy who had taken a fancy to him last night. Or maybe with some slutty girl. It was easy to feel wanted and important when some stranger was showering you with kisses and trying to get your clothes off, but in the morning, you just felt like you let someone make use of you. Maybe I should call him, talk to him properly when he was sober, even suggest he hang out with me or something. That was probably a bad idea, considering how I'd found myself attracted to him. I mulled it over as I finished with the car I was working on, then cleaned my hands and prepared to lock the garage.

The cellphone I used for the business rang and I pulled it out of my pocket quickly.

"Black's Autos?" I answered.

"Hello. This is...um...it's Edward." He stopped and cleared his throat slightly. "Edward Cullen."

I gripped the phone tighter to stop myself dropping it, somewhat astounded. So he sobered up and actually wanted to talk to me. He was silent now, waiting for me to say something.

"Hey, Edward. What can I do for you?"

"I...uh...I wondered...I think there's something wrong with my car," he stammered.

I smirked. He might as well have said 'I want to talk to you, but I need an excuse in case you don't want to talk to me.'

"Ok, what's the problem?"

"I don't know. I mean, I'm not sure. Could you take a look at it?"

"Sure, I'm not busy right now, why don't you bring it over?" I suggested.

"Now? Are you sure it's not too much trouble?"

"It's my job, Edward, just bring it over, ok?"

"Ok. Thank you. I won't be long."

I hung up and pulled the garage door open again and spent the next ten minutes wondering which way this was going to go. An awkward 'it was a mistake' type conversation, which surely could have been done over the phone, or what I was beginning to think more likely - he thought about what happened last night and wanted to throw himself my way a little more because I hadn't rejected him. His Volvo turned off the road a moment later and made its way slowly over the rough ground to the garage. Edward parked by the door and slid out. He had jeans on for once and a t-shirt with an open shirt over the top.

I walked out of the garage and gave him a smile. "So what seems to be the problem?"

"I don't know. It sounds funny. It seems to be...running a bit rough or something," he said, dragging a hand through his hair which was already sticking out at odd angles all over his head as if he had been raking his fingers through it all morning. "Um...actually, there's nothing wrong with the car. I guess I...um...wanted to..." he stuttered, blushing furiously.

Jesus, the guy was like a cat on hot bricks, I thought. He looked as if he might turn and run at the drop of a hat and I did my best not to grin. I stepped towards him instead. I was probably going to regret it, but what the hell. I leaned closer and brushed my lips against his cheek. "Is that what you wanted?"

"Uh...well..." His lips curved up into a smile and he stared down at the ground. "Yes. Sorry, I don't usually do this."

"I know that. Relax. I was going to call you anyway," I told him.

"You were? What about?"

"To see if you survived the hangover I imagined you would have after all those beers." It was the best I could think of at that moment.

"I'm fine," he nodded.

"So, do you want to hang out some time, or go out, for dinner or something?" I suggested. I doubted it would come to anything; I wasn't what he needed, but while he was with me he wouldn't be getting himself into any more stupid situations, I reasoned. I supposed it was a good enough excuse to give myself for asking him out.

"What about Brady?" he asked, biting his lip.

"We broke up. He came over to talk to me this morning. Turns out he kissed someone else too," I said.

"Oh!" His face lit up now and he smiled. "In that case, yes, I'd like that. To have dinner, I mean."

"Sure?"

"Yes, thank you."

"Tomorrow?" I suggested. I already had plans to hang out with Embry that evening.

Edward nodded.

"I'll pick you up," I told him. "Seven."

We exchanged smalltalk for a few more minutes before he left and I locked up the garage, already wondering what the hell I was doing. A date with Edward Cullen? It was probably a recipe for disaster, but after the evening in Finley's, somehow I just liked him and if all we could be was friends, at least I would enjoy his company and perhaps help take his mind off things.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you everyone for reading and reviewing as always. I'm happy to see how well this story is going down so far ;o)**

CHAPTER FIVE

**Jacob's POV**

Embry arrived early that evening and I watched from the window as he got out of his car and headed towards the house carrying a large pizza box. He could always be relied upon to bring food and I went to open the door for him.

"Hey, Em, how's it going?" I said as he stepped past me into the house and headed for the kitchen.

"Pretty good, what about you? I haven't seen you in a while," he said. "Well, I kind of thought I'd dreamed seeing you yesterday."

"Dreaming about me, Embry? Should I be worried?" I teased, plucking two beers from the refrigerator and handing him one.

"I don't know, I suppose it depends on whether I really only dreamed I saw you in Finley's kissing Edward Cullen."

"Shit," I muttered, feeling my face heating up.

"You weren't going to tell me?"

"Yes, of course I was, just not yet."

"What about Brady?"

"We split."

Embry's eyes widened. "When was this? You never tell me anything."

"I'm telling you now. We broke up this morning," I confessed.

"Right - after you got it on with someone else," he smirked. "Nice, Jacob."

"Fuck off, Em, it wasn't quite like that. Besides, Brady did the exact same thing with some guy at work. We talked about it and we're going to stay friends."

"So, tell me more about Cullen. Are you seeing him?"

"Not exactly, but we're going out tomorrow."

"Come on, Jake, Edward Cullen, really? He stole Bella from you."

"You know it wasn't like that, she did the same thing to him as she did to me, only she left it until he got to the altar."

"Yeah, so he's probably on the rebound big time and both of you being ditched by the same girl is hardly a good thing to base a relationship on," Embry said.

"I wouldn't call it a relationship," I protested. "It's one date and I'm well aware he's fucked up over what happened. At least he won't get in trouble if he's hanging out with me."

"So you're baby-sitting him? Seriously, dude, you need to stop putting everybody else first for once in your life. I don't know how you can even want to spend time with someone like him. Don't you like fun any more?"

"He is fun, believe it or not, and have you seen him lately? He's as cute as...um..." I stopped and coughed, having forgotten it was Embry I was talking to. Brady and I talked about other guys like that if we saw one on TV we liked the look of, but I knew it made Embry uncomfortable. God knows what he would do if I ever admitted he'd given me a hard-on countless times when we were teenagers. I smirked to myself and hid it behind my bottle of beer.

Embry stayed until around midnight, sharing the pizza and several beers and watching movies. When he left I took a shower and went to bed and the minute I switched the light off and lay down, I started to think about Edward. I pictured the cute shy smile and his beautiful green eyes, remembered the way his lips felt on mine and imagined myself kissing him somewhere else rather than Finley's - perhaps in my car after dinner.

In my fantasy I parked up on the Cullens' long drive, hidden from the house by the trees and turned to kiss him. I slid my arms around him and drew him close to me, his warm response to my kisses encouraging me to plunge my tongue into his mouth and taste him, making him moan softly. I continued to kiss him urgently, holding him tight in one arm while I unfastened his shirt with my free hand.

By this point I was hard, both in the daydream and in reality and I slid my hand down my body and grasped myself firmly. It was quite a while since I had even bothered to get myself off and now I was aching. I threw the comforter down to the bottom of the bed and began to stroke myself, my mind continuing to play out the little scene with Edward in the car, his hand dropping to my lap and shyly touching me through my jeans. I unbuttoned them to release my cock and thrust it into his hand, feeling his long slim fingers curl around me.

It didn't take me very long to finish and I grabbed a discarded t-shirt to clean myself up, panting and grimacing. I needed to get thoughts like that out of my head before I saw him tomorrow because I was pretty sure nothing of that nature was going to happen. The last thing I wanted was to sit through dinner with a boner.

Eventually I slept and when I rose on Sunday it was already past nine. At a loss for things to do to pass the time, I washed and polished my Corvette in readiness for the evening and then spent some time cleaning the house too. I hated housework with a vengeance and consequently whenever I got around to doing any, it took me hours. At least it kept me busy as I found myself unable to get Edward out of my mind. My imagination was running away with me again, while common sense repeatedly told me I was unlikely to get more than a kiss and if I did, he would be doing it for all the wrong reasons and regret it later. Much as I was looking forward to seeing him, somehow I couldn't help feeling that things weren't going to go as planned and when I eventually set off at six-forty-five to pick him up, I wondered what I was actually letting myself in for.

**Edward's POV**

The events of Friday night, and probably the quantity of beer I drank, had given me a temporary confidence boost. Of course I had the third degree from Mom and Emmett when I literally rolled in, unable to stop myself giggling as I bumped into the post at the bottom of the stairs and tripped up them to my room, but even their worried disapproval hadn't dampened my mood. I had simply gone to my room and fallen on the bed in my clothes, grinning to myself in the darkness as I thought about Jacob Black kissing me while the room spun around me. Obviously he liked me. It wasn't like he was still doing it to get rid of that other guy who had tried to proposition me. He had repeatedly bailed me out of the ridiculous situations I had managed to get myself into and even those failings hadn't stopped him wanting to kiss me. He had even made sure I got home safe and that made me feel warm and fuzzy inside.

I fell asleep, or more accurately passed out and when I woke on Saturday I was filled with butterflies, which served to lessen the effects of the pounding headache caused by the beer. I don't know how I summoned up the courage to actually call Jacob, but bravado after what had happened in Finley's certainly helped. As it was, my hand was shaking when I punched in the number of his garage and then I was struck dumb when he answered. I stammered out something about my car having a problem in the hopes that he would ask me to bring it over, which he did immediately. My small amount of confidence almost deserted me completely as I drove slowly to the Reservation and several times I slowed with the intention of turning around to go back home.

Somehow I made it to Jacob's garage and amazingly I left a short while later with the promise of a dinner date for Sunday night and it took about another couple hours for the excitement to wear off and be replaced by worry. I spent the rest of the day in my room, convincing myself that there was no way this could work out well for me. Jacob was a nice guy, there was no doubt about that, but why did he ask to see me? Was it pity? I really couldn't believe he wanted to spend an evening in my company and yet there was that kiss and another little peck on the cheek when I arrived at the garage. He repeatedly smiled at me and his brown eyes were warm when they looked at me. Hope vied with my conviction that it would all go wrong.

Then something else struck me - I had a date with a guy! Was that really what I wanted? There had been that awful kiss with Jasper's boyfriend three years before which I had reluctantly admitted to myself I liked, even though the guy was a real creep, but I hadn't thought about guys since then - had I? I just couldn't remember how I felt and what I thought about before I met Bella. I had certainly spent a lot of frustrated nights alone with my right hand wishing I could meet someone, but had I fantasised about girls or guys? I considered talking to Jasper for about ten seconds, but he had a big mouth and would most likely just laugh and tell me I was taking it to extremes to forget Bella.

Guys, plural, didn't matter, I decided. I liked Jacob. He looked amazing, he was sweet to me and I enjoyed kissing him. Sure, I freaked out when I thought he wanted to take me home with him, but I would have freaked out with anyone over that. _Sex._ I shuddered and groaned, pressing my hands over my eyes. Seriously, what was the point in me going on a date with anyone? Even someone as nice as Jacob. It wouldn't go anywhere. He'd soon realise what a failure I was and if he didn't, I would run a mile the minute he tried anything. Then again, he probably wouldn't try anything. I knew I looked terrible. Who in their right mind would want to get that close to me? I went back to the idea that Jacob just felt sorry for me and spent the rest of the day wondering how I could get out of the date. I would look like a complete idiot since it was me who instigated it in the first place by going to see him.

I barely slept that night and Sunday morning after breakfast, during which I somehow managed to force down one slice of toast, Mom decided to have another go at talking to me. She had her shrink's hat on again and spent maybe thirty minutes trying to get me to talk the same way she had been doing since Jacob brought me home in the rain. As usual I said what I thought she wanted to hear, but it was obvious she had begun to see through me and was concerned about me returning home drunk on Friday, as well as everything else. In the end I simply told the truth, or at least part of it.

"I'm going out tonight with a friend."

"What friend? I thought you had lost touch with your friends. It would have been nice if you could have caught up with Mike and Tyler. Did you run into one of them the other night?"

"Yes," I nodded. She had made it easy for me and I went along with the suggestion.

"Well, that's good to hear. You know I'm just worried about you, Edward, we all are. I had been thinking it might be better for you to see a counsellor other than myself; a stranger will probably be better able to help."

"I'm fine, Mom, I don't need that," I protested. "I'm not going to try and do anything to myself again."

"But you look so sick, baby, you're horribly underweight. All this not eating properly is obviously to do with what happened with Bella..."

"Please, Mom, will you just leave it?" I sighed. "I'm getting over it. Just give me a chance."

Much to my relief she left me alone, but the episode had only served to make me more tense than I already was. Several times during the rest of the day I found myself tapping out a text to tell Jacob some excuse about why I couldn't go out with him. His business phone was a cell so I wouldn't have to actually talk to him, but I deleted each of the messages without sending them, unable to forget the way he kissed me despite my persistent worry that I was making a mistake.

I took a shower about five, standing under the hot spray with my eyes closed and my heart banging against my ribs, wishing I didn't feel so ridiculously nervous. Maybe it was too soon. Maybe I wasn't ready to be dating. What would my parents and brothers say if they found out I was on a date with a guy?

I continued to be assailed by insecurities as I dried myself off and slowly got dressed - shorts, socks, black pants and a blue shirt. As usual my hair refused to behave and I applied gel in a fairly futile effort to bring it under control. I still looked as if I'd stuck my finger into a power socket, but I was as ready as I could be.

It was six-fifteen and I felt almost sick with nerves. I knew I was being stupid. It was just dinner with someone I had already shared beers with at his house and in a bar. I enjoyed myself those other times. He was easy to talk to, he made me laugh and he was thoughtful; the only difference was that this time it was an actual _date._

I left the house at six-forty-five, anxious that Jacob shouldn't drive right up to the house and be seen by Mom and Jasper who were both home. I had let them think I would be with one of my old friends and having Jacob pick me up would take some explaining.

I walked the quarter mile to the end of the driveway, my hands shoved into the pockets of my Hugo Boss leather jacket, taking deep breaths of the cool air and trying to calm myself down. I really needed to relax and just enjoy myself.

A red classic Corvette with chrome fenders turned slowly off the road just as I passed the last tree lining the drive and it pulled up beside me. Jacob leaned over and pushed open the passenger door, grinning up at me and flashing bright white teeth.

"Hey, Edward. Guess you didn't want your folks seeing me pick you up, huh?"

"No, probably a bad idea." I slid into the car and pulled the door closed, fumbling with my seatbelt. "I love this car."

"Thanks, it's my baby. It was an old wreck I fixed up." He shifted into reverse and edged out slowly onto the deserted road.

I chewed my bottom lip, trying to think of something else to say. What had I managed to talk about half the night on Friday? Beer had certainly been a help.

"What's your favourite type of food, Edward?" Jacob asked, breaking the silence.

"Um...anything really," I said.

"I didn't book anything, I thought I'd ask first. Since it's Sunday I doubt most places will need a reservation. What about Mexican? There's a new restaurant on the next block from Finley's."

"Thank you, that sounds great."

"So did you get any trouble turning up drunk Friday night?" He glanced at me and grinned and I found myself relaxing a little. I wondered if he was asking questions on purpose to make me talk. It was almost as if he sensed how I was feeling and it was certainly helping.

"My Mom and Emmett weren't very impressed, I swear they think I'm still a kid."

"I guess they just worry about you. You had a pretty shit year so far."

'Oh God, don't talk about that,' I thought, my heart sinking, but he barely paused for breath before asking me about my work. Brady worked in computers too, at the main web company in Forks that I had come across a few times when smaller clients had come to me, saying they had been quoted a ridiculous amount of money for a small site and were sure I could do better.

Somehow the journey into Forks and the walk to the restaurant from the parking lot passed quickly and I found myself seated at a corner table with a menu in front of me. Jacob opted to sit next to me rather than opposite and he sent the waiter away to fetch two beers as he shrugged off his jacket and draped it across the chair at the other side of the table. I followed suit and then looked at the menu, although my attention was drawn away from it as I glanced at Jacob. He was wearing a white shirt with the sleeves rolled up, the pale fabric a stark contrast to his russet skin. His forearms seemed huge compared to mine and his biceps strained against his shirt sleeves. His neatly cropped hair was still damp as if he had showered right before he dragged his clothes on and came to meet me. I licked my dry lips and felt my cheeks heating up. He was undeniably hot and here I was shamelessly checking him out. I quickly dropped my eyes back to the menu, hoping he hadn't noticed. I stared blankly at the list of dishes in front of me, restraining myself with difficulty from wiping my damp palms on my napkin.

"I'm going to start with the calamari and chipotle mayo," he said. "Then steak fajitas. What do you fancy, Edward?"

'You,' I thought immediately. 'Oh, shit, did I say that out loud?'

The waiter arrived at the table again and placed a bottle of Corona in front of each of us, asked if we were ready to order.

"I'll have the same," I said quickly.

Jacob gave the order and handed back the menus, took a mouthful of his beer and turned to look at me. "I'm a bit surprised you came out with me, to be honest," he said. "If Friday was an experiment, prompted by the beer...I mean, did you ever have any interest in guys before?"

"Um...not really...maybe...this guy kissed me once a few years ago," I blurted. "I guess I liked it, although I didn't want to. He was Jasper's boyfriend; a real creep. Jasper went mad and thought I encouraged him. I put it out of my mind after that, I suppose. I'm not very good at meeting people. Apart from that kiss, there was nothing else before Bella."

"Well, don't worry, we can go as slow as you like, I'm not in any hurry," Jacob smiled.

"But you're used to being with a guy," I said in surprise.

"I'm not used to being with you."

"I'm surprised you want to be."

"Why, because of the past year or so? Forget about that. We both got shit on; that's nothing to do with this. You seem like a really nice guy, Edward, and I'd like to get to know you better."

I found myself smiling back at him. My worries seemed to disperse a little and I began to enjoy myself. Jacob went on talking as we ate the starter and I was no longer struggling to find things to say. The waiter removed our empty plates and returned with more beers and stacks of sizzling fajita fixings - steak, onions and peppers still smoking with small dishes of salsa, cheese, lettuce and sour cream and a pile of wraps. My mouth watered and I realised I had a real appetite for the first time in months.

I ate until I was uncomfortable, unused to eating a proper decent-sized meal. It was then, as I watched Jacob finishing his food, that doubts began to plague me again. I excused myself and went to the bathroom to wash my hands, unable to avoid my reflection in front of me above the sink. The bright lights in the room in contrast to the dim light in the restaurant made me cringe as I looked at my pale thin face. I had never really liked the way I looked; never been confident in my appearance and Bella's words, which came back to me now loud and clear, had only reinforced that.

_'You should think yourself lucky that you have me, Edward, no one else in their right mind would ever look twice at you.'_

Who was I kidding? Jacob didn't really want me - surely he felt nothing but sympathy for me. He had everything - good looks, sex appeal, confidence, a sense of humour - all the things I didn't have. He was wasting his time trying to cheer me up when he could be with someone who deserved him. He wasn't getting anything out of this. I was lousy company and I wouldn't even be able to give him anything later to make it worth his while. Even if I found the guts to try, I wouldn't have the first clue what I was doing and he would see me exactly for what I was - a failure.

I dried my hands and ran them through my hair, glancing at my watch and wondering how long I had been in here. Too long and Jacob would be wondering what the hell I was doing. I headed back to the table, all the insecurities of the earlier part of the day flooding back.

Jacob was leaning back in the seat sipping his beer, the table having been cleared and two dessert menus now lying there. I slid into my seat and rested my hands on the table. I declined dessert - I couldn't have eaten another bite - and Jacob ordered coffees instead. He clearly noticed the change in me and waited until the waiter took off again before touching my hand.

"You've gone really pale, are you ok?"

"Yes. Sorry."

He kept on talking to me while we drank the coffee, but I was back to my tense awkwardness, unable to think of things to say to keep the conversation going. I wished I had gone with my gut instinct earlier in the day and just sent the text making an excuse to not see him and I only felt relief when he paid the check and led me out of the restaurant. We walked to the car in silence and I sank miserably into the passenger seat, waiting while Jacob started the engine and drove out onto the street. He glanced over at me for a second and then looked back at the road.

"Do you want to tell me what's wrong?"

"It's nothing. I'm sorry, I'm just lousy company," I sighed.

"No, you're not. You seemed to be having a good time until after the main."

I looked down at my hands. I didn't know what to say and I felt like a complete fool.

"I'm sorry," I repeated. "I shouldn't have come out with you."

"You changed your mind about dating a guy?"

"No!" I exclaimed. "It's not that."

"You're not ready for this, are you?" Jacob said.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Stop saying you're sorry, Edward, it doesn't matter." He reached out suddenly and grasped my hand, pulling it towards him and resting it on his thigh, lacing our fingers together. "I could see that. I've been there, remember? I threw myself at a number of random people after Bella because I thought feeling wanted would make me feel better. It didn't, of course, it made me feel cheap. When I saw you sat there in Finley's waiting to be taken advantage of, I saw myself again, only probably a sight more vulnerable. Yeah, I like you. I think you're a really sweet guy and I'd be happy if you wanted to see me, but I asked you out because I thought you'd be better off with me than someone who doesn't know anything about you, that would just make things worse."

"Oh, God," I groaned. Everything he said was only confirming what I had already decided - that I didn't deserve him; not by a long shot. He had been nothing but nice to me ever since he dragged me away from the edge of the cliff and now he had seen right through me. I didn't know whether to feel embarrassed or grateful.

The Corvette pulled off the road a moment later and halted under the first tree on our driveway. Jacob cut the engine and turned the lights off. He was still holding my hand and now he turned to look at me.

"Edward..."

I looked up slowly and met his eyes, biting my bottom lip hard to stop it quivering. I wanted to cry, but I was determined not to make myself look even more pathetic in front of him than I already had.

"I didn't have things that bad, but I got hints of what it would have been like if I stayed with her. I don't know what went on with you, but it's pretty clear it messed you up. You don't need a date, you need a friend. I can be that if you want. If you decide you want to talk about things with somebody who gets where you're coming from, give me a call. You know where I am."

"You mean that," I said. It was a statement rather than a question; I could see he meant it.

"Yeah. You won't move on until you face things."

"My Mom keeps telling me that. She's a shrink," I said with a half laugh.

"Well, she's right, but she might not be the best person to be listening to it."

"Thank you," I said.

He gave my hand a squeeze and let go. A moment later I was out of the car and walking back towards the house. I saw the car's headlights on the drive almost reaching me before he reversed back out into the road and headed off towards the Reservation. I held it together until I got indoors, fielded Jasper as quickly as I could manage and headed up to my room. Then I locked the door, undressed and slid into bed.

Could Jacob really help me, I wondered? Would I ever be able to summon up the courage to actually tell him how I felt about myself? My biggest fear was that he would see me how I saw myself - weak and worthless - and then he would probably want nothing more to do with me. But if I didn't take him up on his offer, would I ever stop viewing myself that way? It was Catch 22 and I pulled the pillow over my head, folding my arms over the top to smother the sound as I began to cry.


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you all for reading and reviewing the last installment! Edward's about to pour his heart out in this one ;o)**

CHAPTER SIX

**Jacob's POV**

I was home ten minutes later. It was still early and I grabbed the last beer from the refrigerator, kicked off my shoes and threw my shirt in the laundry before I went into the lounge and switched on the television. I stared absently at some mindless TV drama, sipping my beer and thinking about Edward. I had hated seeing him like that. When I picked him up he had been a little nervous, but he soon seemed to relax and enjoy himself. Then right after we finished the main, something changed; it was like flicking a switch and he seemed to virtually fall apart in front of me. He had absolutely no confidence in himself and seemed to think he was worthless; all Bella's doing, no doubt and I could only imagine how he had been treated living under her roof.

I hoped fervently that he would take me up on my offer and talk to me, but somehow I doubted it. He seemed worried about displeasing me or looking like a fool, but who else was there? He could go and talk to some shrink who would say all the usual things they did to people with problems, but they wouldn't really understand where he was coming from. I did at least partially and it wouldn't matter what he said to me - I wasn't going to think badly of him, but he had to come around to that decision for himself and contact me if he wanted.

I sighed heavily. I had his number in both my phones - it had showed up on my work cell when he called on Saturday morning and I saved the number just in case, but I knew I couldn't call him. He'd probably just feel pressured and pull away. That poor boy; what the hell must he have been through? I had been dying to wrap my arms around him and hold him in the car, but him getting the idea I was coming on to him at that point would have been the last thing he needed.

"Fuck," I muttered. There was really nothing I could do except wait and hope I would hear from him.

Embry didn't waste much time calling me after work Monday to find out how the 'date' went. I reminded him I had been hanging out with Edward as friends more than anything else, expecting him to make some kind of joke about Edward or insult him, but it seemed he had more exciting news to tell me.

"Do you remember Paul Lahote?"

"Who could forget that fucker?" I said.

The Lahote family had lived on the Reservation years ago and Paul had been in a fair few of my classes at school, at least when he could be bothered to show up. When he did deign to grace the school with his presence he frequently had black eyes or other bruises and boasted that he'd kicked the butt of some bigger guy who managed to get a lucky punch in. Everyone knew his Dad beat the shit out of both him and his Mom, but he would have denied it until he was blue in the face. No doubt his home life was mostly responsible for him being such a trouble maker and I'd had one run in with him myself when I caught him bullying Seth. We were about fourteen then, Seth only twelve and small for his age. I had never liked fighting and would avoid confrontation whenever I could, but I hadn't that day. I was a little bigger than Paul and he had felt both my fists before Embry and Quil turned up and Paul backed down, realising he couldn't possibly get the better of all three of us.

Not long after this Paul was excluded from science class for calling the tutor a fag when he was reprimanded for not handing in his homework and subsequently expelled for smoking and drinking outside the sports centre. Around this time his parents split, his Mom left the Reservation and went to live with her sister in Portland and his Dad sold up and returned to Tacoma where they had originally come from, taking Paul with him. No one had been sad to see him go.

"He's back," Embry said. "I saw him yesterday."

"Awesome," I said sarcastically. "I hope he's not staying."

"He's living in Forks, got a job and everything," Embry told me. "Looks like we're stuck with him and that's not the worst of it."

"Go on," I prompted.

"He's Brady's new man."

"What the fuck? How the hell did that happen? Paul hated gays! And Brady has the hots for some guy he works with!"

"Yeah, he's the new graphics guy or something. God knows how, but he apparently got it together in Tacoma and got himself an education. I did a bit of digging when I saw them. I talked to Seth and he said Brady had been in touch with him."

"Saw them? Who?" I asked, feeling sick and knowing what he was going to say.

"Paul and Brady, fooling around together. They didn't see me, they were..."

"Don't tell me any more," I groaned. "Jesus, what the fuck is Brady thinking?"

"Well, he obviously doesn't know what Paul used to be like. The Fullers didn't live here that long when they were here before, did they? Anyway, people change, Jacob," Embry said doubtfully.

"You're telling me Paul Lahote turned into a decent human being - a decent _gay_ human being?" I sneered. "Bullshit."

"Why don't you call Brady and find out? You still talk to him, don't you?"

"Yeah, I will," I said and did exactly that the minute I hung up. Brady was home alone, luckily.

"Hey, I was going to call you!" he exclaimed and proceeded to ask me how I was getting on with Edward.

"Yeah, good, we're just friends," I said absently. "So this guy at your work place..."

"Paul, yeah, he's awesome," Brady gushed at once.

"He's a jerk," I said. "He used to live here years back, did he tell you that?"

"Yeah, he told me." The excitement in Brady's voice dispersed. "He had a really shit life here."

"Mostly of his own making."

"Mostly of his Dad's making," Brady corrected. "He kicked the shit out of Paul for everything. Started by beating his Mom and when Paul got big enough to try and stop it, his Dad turned on him."

"He hated gays," I said. "He bullied Seth. He was always in trouble..."

"He _was _gay. He tried to ignore it because his Dad probably would have killed him. His Dad did almost kill him in Tacoma when he was sixteen after catching him with some boy. When he got out of the hospital he had to go live with some friend's family until he went to Uni; his Dad did time for assault. His friend's parents helped him sort things out and get his life in order. He'd probably be in jail himself by now if they hadn't have helped him. He turned everything around. I know all about what happened here, he's not proud of himself for being a bully and getting himself expelled."

"Well, shit," I said in surprise. "I guess I didn't really look behind the front he put on. No one did." Somehow I didn't doubt what Brady was telling me, although when I finished talking to him I did look up events in the news in Tacoma for around six years previous and discovered reports on Mick Lahote being jailed for practically beating his teenage son to death. I knew I was a soft touch, but I immediately felt sorry for the young boy Paul had been and wished I had taken the time to try talking to him instead of condemning him. I decided if I ran into him I would at least make an effort to be civil, for Brady if nothing else.

The rest of the week crawled by and I spent a good part of Saturday afternoon and Sunday hanging out with Embry and Quil. Embry was still bemoaning the fact that he had been single for far too long, while Quil boasted about the girl he had recently met and been on one date with. The pair of them were at least a distraction as I struggled not to think about Edward constantly. I hadn't heard a thing from him and a dozen times I had begun tapping out a text to him, just to ask how he was, but never sent any of them. I would just have to wait for him to contact me, if he ever did.

Another week passed and still I heard nothing from any of the Cullens - not even so much as one of their numerous vehicles coming in for a service. I did my best to just shrug it off and resign myself to the fact that I wasn't going to see him again, but I just couldn't get him out of my mind. Friday night I did text him, a casual message asking him to let me know how he was doing, but he didn't answer and I guessed he wasn't going to. I found myself much more disappointed than I would have expected.

Saturday I ran into Brady and Paul in Forks just as I was coming out of the car parts warehouse. They had clearly been in the diner and were about to get into an almost new Dodge Ram which I presumed must be Paul's. Brady turned away from the truck as soon as he saw me and came over to talk. Paul followed slowly, a slight sneer on his face.

"Hey, Brady, how's it going?" I asked.

"Great!" he beamed. "We're about to head to the movies."

Paul halted beside him and eyed me narrowly. "Black," he said with a slight nod.

"Hey, Paul. I heard you were back in town," I said pleasantly and stuck my hand out for him to shake or ignore as he wished. His hands were in his pockets currently. He hesitated and raised an eyebrow, then his right hand came out and shook mine firmly.

"Couldn't stay away from the damned place," he said wrily.

"Good thing too," Brady smirked, elbowing him.

We chatted for a few more minutes and I was surprised by how different Paul seemed from what I remembered. Still, it was about eight years since he had left La Push and a lot had happened since then. At least I no longer felt anxious about Brady being with him. I left them eventually and went home.

I had no plans for the rest of the day and I filled in time by emailing my sisters, both of whom had left La Push years before to live in Hawaii and New York. We kept in touch weekly and they had come back for Dad's funeral, both of them signing over their share of the house to me, given that they each had decent jobs and fairly well-off men. Later I made myself some dinner and switched on the television, idly fiddling with my phone and wishing Edward would just send me a text. The phone stayed silent and I eventually tossed it onto the coffee table and put my feet up.

About thirty minutes later when I happened to look out of the window, I was astonished to see Edward's Volvo out there, parked close to the garage. It was dusk and I could make out that it was his car, but nothing else. He must still be inside it and I watched curiously, my heart skipping unevenly as I waited for him to get out. He didn't and I fidgetted constantly, almost tempted to go out there and ask if he was ok. Perhaps ten minutes passed and then suddenly he slid out of the car, slammed the door and began to stride purposefully towards the house. I shrank away from the window and waited.

I forced myself to walk slowly to the door when he knocked, rather than wrench it open as if I had been waiting at the other side of it. He was standing nervously on the porch, hands in the pockets of black jeans, a grey shirt hanging loose over them. He was chewing his lip, eyes darting about and avoiding mine. His face was pale and drawn, eyes ringed with shadows.

"Hey, Edward." I smiled at him encouragingly.

"Hey." He licked his lips and continued to avoid my eyes. "I'm sorry I haven't been in touch. I guess I didn't know what to say. Your text gave me a...nudge. I'd like to take you up on...what you said. If that's ok. I mean, if it's not too much trouble."

"Of course it's ok, come in," I said at once. I hated how apologetic he was, it was like he expected that whatever he did or said would be wrong. "Would you like a beer or coffee or something?" I offered as I led the way into the lounge and quickly turned off the television.

"No, thank you."

"How have you been?" I sat down at one end of the sofa, giving him the option of taking the other end or keeping some distance between us by sitting in the armchair. He took the chair and slumped into it as if he didn't have the energy to stay upright.

"Ok, I guess. No, that's a lie actually. If I was ok I wouldn't be here about to make a complete fool of myself." He grimaced and squeezed his eyes shut for a moment.

"You won't do that. I asked you to come talk to me if you thought it would help, remember? Nothing you say is going to make me think you're a fool. I asked myself a hundred times why I put up with Bella's shit for so long and never told anyone what happened; it was because I was humiliated and ashamed of letting myself be treated like that and I guess a part of me believed that despite everything, she did love me."

Edward seemed to relax a fraction, but he didn't say anything else until a full minute had ticked by on the clock over the mantle.

"When you found me on the cliff, I wasn't doing that because I was heartbroken that she jilted me," he began suddenly. "I thought there was no reason for me to go on if I'm such a failure. I've never had that much confidence in myself, but she destroyed what I had and made me feel completely worthless. I felt like there was no point to my life because no one was ever going to want me. I guess I still feel like that."

"But you have hope, or you wouldn't be trying to find a way to move on," I said quietly, remembering that his words matched almost exactly what I imagined he was feeling.

"Yes, I suppose I do. That's your doing really, although I kind of resigned myself to the fact that you probably won't want to know me after...I tell you things..."

"Edward, whatever you tell me won't make a bit of difference to what I think of you," I told him. "I like you and I admire you for deciding you have to face it."

"I hardly know where to start," he said with a shaky laugh and paused for another moment before beginning to ramble. I didn't say a word as I listened, guessing it would be better to let him talk unless he gave me some sign he wanted feedback on something.

"I guess most people would start from the beginning, but there isn't really a beginning in my mind, there's just...ugh...a mess. My parents and my brothers don't know how to treat me; even Mom, but I suppose your son's pretty different from one of your patients. They think I'm starving myself because I'm so devastated Bella left me. I know I look like shit, believe me, I don't want to look like this, it got to be a habit. It was stupid really; Bella made this comment one time...that I needed to lose weight. It was not long after I moved in with her. I don't need a shrink to tell me why I still don't eat, I know how to read and I do a lot of it. I wasn't in control of my life - she was - but I could control what I ate, or didn't as it were. I know that sounds fucked up, but it ended up being my mission in life - get through every day with that little bit of control." He shuddered. "Since I got home my family treat me like I'm five years old or something, especially since you stopped me jumping. So it's no different. They're in control of everything, always checking up on me to make sure I'm not after the kitchen knives or any of Dad's meds or whatever. You know what? The only time I enjoyed eating in the last few months was the meal I had with you and then I had to go and wreck it all. I looked at myself in the mirror in the bathroom and I was just thinking, there is nothing there that you could possibly be interested in; you must just have pitied me and it made me feel pathetic."

"God, Edward, it wasn't like that at all," I groaned, unable to keep quiet. He paused for a moment, but didn't respond and I bit my lip and told myself to keep it buttoned and let him get it out.

"She came to me to get a laptop fixed," he went on. "That's how I met her. It was totally destroyed and I suppose since then I've wondered if she didn't plan it all; you know, seek me out because of my family's money. We don't exactly keep a low profile. Whatever, she pursued me. I had no clue about things; I'd never had a date or had a girl show any interest in me. She made me feel like I was special. Most of the time she was all over me. We had one date and then she was calling me and texting me every day, several times, wanting to see me. It excited me; I thought she was beautiful, sexy, confident and she wanted _me. _I fell hook, line and sinker and she kept on encouraging me. I hardly noticed when she started getting bossy and possessive. She was constantly saying she loved me, she missed me, she wanted to be with me all the time and she asked me to move in with her. We hadn't even...um...slept together by then. She wanted to and she never made any secret of how impatient she was, but I kept resisting. She seemed amazing to me and I wanted to be perfect for her and I knew I wouldn't be."

I bit my tongue to stop me blurting anything out. I could have quite cheerfully throttled Bella at that moment. She had loved sex and made it obvious with me that she couldn't get enough of it. She liked to try all kinds of stuff that I wasn't really into, that I had gone along with to please her - games with toys and handcuffs and blindfolds and kinky outfits. I'd never had sex before, but I was eager and I learned fast. I shuddered at the thought of her making Edward do anything like that, imagining him to be shy and reserved in the bedroom, especially the first time.

"I don't know if I should tell you this," he murmured.

"It's ok, you can say anything you want," I said softly.

"Um...well..." He flushed vividly. "I moved in and the first night was...uh...my first time. Only time, really. I was nervous and pretty useless, I suppose. She wouldn't stop talking, telling me what I should be doing." He lowered his head and put his hands over his hot cheeks. "I didn't even finish and she was pissed. Made me...lick her instead. The next day she showed me this video of her and this other guy and told me I better watch and learn because she didn't want another disappointment like that. I was humiliated and hurt; I didn't want to see her with someone else and she told me to grow up and view it as an education. Then later she was doing what she always did...grovelling, telling me she was sorry for upsetting me, she loved me, she hated herself for making me feel bad..."

I clenched my fists in my lap and gritted my teeth. What he was saying was so familiar. Not the sex part, but the way Bella would grovel and cry, beg forgiveness, confess undying love and then spend a few days being as sweet as could be before she started with some other nasty or controlling behaviour.

"We never did it again; I couldn't...um...fuck..." He reddened even more. "...get it up. I made a lot of excuses and kept her happy with the other stuff and she didn't seem to mind that much. She was really sweet again and we started talking about getting married. She picked her own ring."

Edward's voice shook and he brushed away a single tear that slid down his cheek. It was all I could do to make myself stay on the sofa and not get up and go to him. He went on to tell me things I'd be through myself - emotional blackmail, pulling me away from my friends and family, alternately putting me down and making me feel like I was the most important thing in the world, screwing with my head and my heart until I didn't know which way was up, but through it all destroying my confidence. For me it had been a fraction of what Edward had felt; I was tougher and I had it for a shorter period of time. He told me he found out she had been sleeping with some piece of trash from a trailer park and she had started off being defiant, telling him she liked cock and she had to get it from somewhere, then afterwards cried and pleaded and promised not to do it again, she loved him so much and felt terrible for hurting him. I could relate to that too.

"Why did I let her keep doing that to me?" he said now. "I don't even know. Somehow I thought when we got married it would be different, but why would it? I'd just have been trapped in it. I _was_ trapped. Even through all that I was convinced she was all I wanted, that I couldn't live without her and she kept telling me she couldn't live without me. One time she said she would kill herself if she ever lost me. Emmett noticed things weren't right when he turned up out of the blue to see me one day; he said he was worried about how much I changed and that I didn't seem happy and that I was too thin. I was too ashamed of myself to say anything; I told him I'd been sick, but I'd be fine because Bella was looking after me." He choked on the words. "That's a joke, isn't it? She looked after me alright. Fixed me up so I'd hate myself and no on would want anything to do with me. She was livid about Emmett visiting. One of the things she told me was that it hurt her when I saw my family because her Dad was dead and her Mom was thousands of miles away so she didn't have anyone."

He had tears rolling down his cheeks now and he continued talking for perhaps another ten minutes, telling me more things that were so familiar - Bella cleverly taking away anything that mattered to him, making herself the only important thing in his life, just like she had tried to do with me. Even small things like his music which he loved so much; it was one more thing that took his attention away from her and since getting home to his family, he still hadn't touched the piano. She was a clever, manipulative bitch and she got what she wanted by making you feel bad, by alternating crying and begging with unkind comments and dominance. The result was that Edward felt like he had failed in the relationship and that there would be no point in him trying another. The same had applied to me, only I had spent a few weeks having one-night stands in an effort to make myself feel wanted and then got my head together and moved on, but I hadn't been through anywhere near as much.

Edward stopped talking and bent forward, his hands over his face and his forehead almost touching his knees as he sobbed brokenly and I threw myself off the sofa and crossed the room to him. He didn't even notice me until I was on my knees at his feet, wrapping my arms around him.

"I'm...s-sorry," he choked out.

"Don't say that. It's over now, let go of it," I whispered, stroking my hand over his wild hair as he shivered in my arms. "It's going to be ok, she can't ever hurt you again."

He wept until he was exhausted and the neck of my t-shirt was soaked with his tears and then pulled away slowly and sat up straight, wiping his face with his shirt sleeve.

"I am...so tired," he said croakily.

"You'll feel better when you get some sleep."

There was no way I would have let him drive home now and I got to my feet and pulled him up, steering him into the room which had once been Dad's, which I now had made up as a guest room. Edward sat on the edge of the bed listlessly while I took his shoes off and then collapsed onto the pillow. I draped the comforter over him and sat on the floor next to the bed for the brief minutes it took for him to fall asleep, then I slipped out of the room and closed the door before spitting out a volley of expletives under my breath. That fucking evil bitch Bella, if she had been right in front of me at that moment I would have forgotten that men shouldn't hit women and knocked her fucking head off of her shoulders.

I returned to the lounge to turn the light off before I went to bed myself and then noticed Edward's phone and keys on the arm of the chair where he had been sitting. His family would probably be frantic if he didn't come home. I grabbed up the phone and began scrolling through the contacts, wondering which one of them to call. His parents would probably both start with the third degree and I didn't want to have to make up too much shit to explain. I called Emmett and he answered on the first ring.

"Edward, where the fuck are you? We're worried sick! Mom and Dad are out looking for you!" His voice yelled down the phone and I held it away from my ear for a second.

"It's Jacob Black," I said then.

"Oh, fuck, what happened? Is Edward ok?" Emmett groaned. "He went out earlier without saying anything. He's been worse than usual the last couple of weeks."

"Don't worry, he's fine," I told him quickly. "He's sleeping in my guest room."

"I'll come over and get him," he said at once. "I'm sorry you keep getting dragged into this."

"No, it's fine, let him stay here. He came to see me, to talk," I explained. "About what happened, you know, with Bella?"

"I wish he'd fucking talk to us," Emmett sighed.

"He can relate to me, I've been there," I reminded him. "He's ashamed more than anything, which is pretty much the same way I felt. If he doesn't want to tell you about it, it's best you don't push him. I sure as hell wouldn't want my family to know the details."

"Ok." He let out another heavy sigh. "Do you think he'll be alright?"

"Yeah, I think he just needs some time," I said. "You better call your parents, let them know where he is."

"Yeah...right. Thanks, Jacob, for calling."

I hung up and put the phone back on the arm of the chair, then went to my room. I washed up and cleaned my teeth in the en suite, then stripped off and fell into bed. I didn't think I would sleep; I was so angry about what Edward had been through and I wanted nothing more than to wrap him up in my arms and make it all go away, but I knew I couldn't do that. I couldn't do anything except be there for him if he needed me. I closed my eyes with a sigh and somehow, within a few minutes, I fell asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

**As always, thank you all for reading and for leaving reviews, you know how much I love them :o) Hope you enjoy the latest installment as Edward tries to keep a promise he makes to Jacob.**

CHAPTER SEVEN

**Edward's POV**

When I opened my eyes, for a moment I didn't know where I was. I was lying on my back staring at an unfamiliar ceiling, a red comforter wrapped around me and I was still wearing my clothes. Then I remembered everything and I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling my face begin to burn with embarrassment as I saw myself pouring everything out to Jacob and then crying all over him like a baby. Oh God, what must he think of me? I lay there cringing for perhaps five minutes before I came to the conclusion that Jacob probably wasn't very surprised by most of what I said, having been there himself. He was the one person who did understand, better even than Mom or her shrink colleagues. That had been the whole point of me coming to talk to him after all. Mom had made me go to an appointment with a guy she worked with ten days before and I had never felt more ill at ease in my life. I had refused to say a word and later shut myself away in my room for the rest of the day. My family hadn't a clue what to do with me and I had begged them to just give me some space to get my head straight. They had reluctantly done that, so had I achieved anything by putting myself through the agony of telling Jacob everything?

I lay thinking for perhaps thirty minutes. I did feel different; not enormously, it wasn't like I'd suddenly found a miracle cure or anything, but I felt lighter, as if a big black cloud hanging over me had started to break up in the wind or something. I was surprised to feel myself smile at the cliched metaphor and I sat up slowly and looked around me. An open door indicated an en suite and I got up and went to use the toilet and freshen up. I was still embarrassed about having to face Jacob. I couldn't hear any sounds that indicated he was awake and part of me wanted to creep out of the house before he saw me, but there was no way I would do that after he'd been so good to me.

I dampened my hair and made a vain attempt to flatten it. One of these days I would have the damned mop cut off so I didn't look quite so much like a mad scientist. I hesitated for another few minutes and then heard sounds from another part of the house. Well, he was up. I put my shoes on and left the room, my heart thumping nervously.

Jacob was in the kitchen making coffee and I avoided looking at him as I walked in. He treated me as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

"Hey, Edward, did you sleep ok?"

"Yes, I did, thanks."

"Coffee?"

"Please."

"White with one, right?"

"How do you know that?" I asked in surprise.

"That's how you drank it in the restaurant," he grinned, pouring coffee from a percolator into a large mug with a picture of a Corvette on it. He added sugar and milk and passed it to me. "I called Emmett last night to let him know where you were."

"Oh! Well, thanks, I didn't think about that, I guess they must have been worried."

"Yeah, a bit," he smiled. "I didn't say much, just that you came to talk to me."

"I...um..." I felt like I should thank him or apologise for everything, but he interrupted me.

"You don't have to say anything. Leave it behind you and start afresh from today."

"Ok. Yes, I'll do that." I sipped my coffee and we stood in silence for a few minutes until Jacob asked if I wanted breakfast. "No, thank you, I better get home."

"Sure. Your phone and keys are in the lounge." He put his mug down and waited while I fetched the items, then walked with me to the door. "Edward, will you promise me something?"

"Yes?"

"Start taking care of yourself. Be in control of that."

"I will, I promise," I said at once. For the first time in a long time, I was beginning to feel I did actually have hope. I opened the door and stepped out onto the porch. "Thank you for being here for me."

"Hey, wait a minute." Barefoot, Jacob came outside towards me. "Come here."

I was surprised when he suddenly wrapped his arms around me and I found myself hugging him back. I pressed my face into his neck and held onto him for a long moment before he let go of me. He felt so good holding me, his strong arms around me and warm hands on my back. I couldn't help wishing things were different, wishing that I was further along the road to recovery.

"Will you call me or text or something and let me know how you are?" he asked now.

I nodded at once and a moment later I was walking back to my car. Jacob was still standing on the porch watching as I drove away and as I headed for home I wondered what I should say to everybody. I was pretty sure Emmett would have told the others whatever Jacob said to him and I expected I would have to face Mom and Dad's scrutiny when I got in. However, the only sign of life was music, if you could call it that, coming from the gym. I headed that way and found Emmett lifting weights and listening to one of his awful heavy metal CDs. He was shirtless and glistening with sweat. He put the large dumbbells down when he saw me and went to turn the music off.

"Where's everyone else?" I asked, noticing that it was still only eight-thirty. Usually Mom would be cooking breakfast about now on a Sunday.

"There was an explosion at the steel factory a couple of hours ago, multiple casualties. Dad got called into the hospital and Mom went along to see if she could be of help to some of the families. Jasper's still in bed, lazy little bastard," he grinned. "Are you ok?"

"Yes, thanks."

"So, you talked to Jacob about Bella?"

"Yes. Don't ask me to go over all that again," I sighed.

"I wasn't going to. So long as it helped, that's the main thing."

"Yes, it did." I took a deep breath. _'Start afresh from today. Start taking care of yourself,'_ Jacob had said. I had promised I would do as he asked.

"Emmett, will you help me with something?"

"Sure, what?"

"I need to sort myself out; get healthy and look better. Can you help me do that?"

"Seriously?" Emmett said in surprise.

"Yes, whatever you think necessary, I'll do, just train me like you do your clients." I was aware that I was basically telling Emmett to control me, but this time it was my choice to change myself and I doubted I would succeed at it on my own.

Emmett beamed. "I could kiss Jacob Black right now."

I coughed and felt my cheeks warming up as I immediately remembered him kissing me in Finley's. I didn't think that would ever happen again, but I could hope.

"You ready to start now?" Emmett asked.

"Yes."

"Ok, so we need to establish exactly what you want out of this. I mean, how do you imagine yourself looking by the end of it?"

"Um...I don't know...better than I do now," I said. I wouldn't know where to start. Everyone looked better than I did. I glanced at Emmett's bare chest, thinking I would never look like that if I worked out every day for ten years - he was huge.

"Never mind me, I take everything to extremes," he snorted. "You don't have the build to get like this anyway. Jasper!" he shouted suddenly. "Get down here!"

"What the fuck do you want?" Jasper yelled back from upstairs. "I'm asleep!"

"Just get in here!"

Jasper sauntered in a few minutes later, wearing the boxers and t-shirt he slept in, his hair tousled and a mug of coffee in his hand that he had grabbed from the machine in the kitchen on the way.

"What?" he yawned. "Hey, Edward, are you ok?"

"Yes, thanks."

"Get your shirt off," Emmett ordered.

Jasper smirked and balanced his mug on the control panel of the nearby cycling machine. "Emmett, I know you're jealous of my body, but isn't it a little early?"

"Fuck off, just do it."

Shrugging, Jasper peeled off his t-shirt and proceeded to pose like a model, shoving one hip out with his hand resting on it, thrusting his chest forward and pouting before turning around and doing the same thing facing the other way. I bit my lip to suppress a snigger.

"Jas, stop being such a dick," Emmett grimaced. "Have you any idea how camp you are?"

"I am not camp, I'm putting it on, you jerk." He spun around again and grabbed his coffee. "What did you want me for, anyway?"

"Shut up." Emmett pointed at him and looked at me. "You could look like him in, say, three or four months if you work hard. Still slim, but toned - pecs, abs, arms and legs, defined but not bulging."

Jasper rolled his eyes and picked up his t-shirt. "Can I go now?"

"Yes."

"What would I have to do?" I asked. I knew Jasper looked good. If I could look even half as good I would be much happier than I was currently.

"Everything I tell you," Emmett said.

"Ok."

"Did you eat anything yet today?"

"No, I just had coffee."

"Ok, then, let's get started." Emmett turned on his heel and charged towards the kitchen, glancing back once to check I was following. "You're going to need something to give you some energy first. Carbs."

I watched in horror as Emmett poured a large quantity of oatmeal into a bowl, added milk and sugar and stuck it into the microwave. Oatmeal was a great source of carbohydrates and released energy slowly, he informed me. Perfect for a good workout.

"I'll never eat all that, I'm half your size," I protested.

"And that's about half the amount I normally eat," he grinned, pulling a pack of assorted red fruits out of the refrigerator. When the oatmeal finished cooking, he dumped a handful of fruit on top and stuck a spoon into it. "Get that down you."

I sat down at the kitchen counter with a sigh and began to eat. The size of the portion was daunting and I did my best to think about other things to distract myself from it, but I didn't really need to as Emmett started talking, outlining a plan of what would work best to get me in shape.

"CV is the last thing you want to be doing unless it's just a gentle warm-up," he was saying. "We're going to work your muscles, starting with chest and biceps today, back and triceps on Tuesday, shoulders and legs on Thursday. That's what I do with everyone I book in who's starting from scratch. Also abs at the beginning of every session."

"What about the other days?" I asked.

"Rest."

"I'd rather do it every day and get things moving," I told him, putting my spoon down.

"That's not the right way to do it. Keep eating. When you work a muscle hard, you're actually breaking it. Then you rest and feed it protein and it re-grows bigger."

"You're in here practically every day," I reminded him, digging into the oatmeal again.

"I've been doing this for years. I didn't start out this way. Three days a week and a lot of food and rest in between for months before I increased the frequency."

"Oh. So how long is this going to take?"

"You'll see some difference in maybe a month. It's not a race, Edward, you need to do this the right way."

"Ok."

Somehow I managed to eat about three-quarters of the oatmeal before my stomach simply would not take another bite. Emmett sent me off to do what I wanted for a while and instructed me to come back to the gym at eleven o'clock in shorts and t-shirt. I went to my room and spent the time online, reading up about working out. A lot of it seemed so technical and I had never realised how involved it was, despite living with a personal trainer for years. I supposed I had never really taken much notice. To my mind, Emmett just ate a lot, worked out a lot and ended up enormous.

The first workout took only an hour. Somehow I had expected to be in the gym for half the day, but I quickly realised I wouldn't have lasted any longer; in fact I struggled after the first twenty minutes, despite my initial protest that Emmett giving me such light weights to work with was embarrassing. The abs work hadn't been too bad, with an assortment of different types of crunches although I could certainly feel it in my stomach muscles. Next I started the chest exercises - chest presses on a cable machine, then something Emmett called a 'pec deck', then bench presses with a barbell and front raises with five pound dumbbells. Each set of exercises comprised ten repetitions and of these, I worked three sets. I was quickly panting for breath and sweating out every ounce of fluid in my body, feeling slightly sick with the effort. I gritted my teeth and ploughed on, determined not to make myself look any weaker than I already did.

With the chest exercises done, biceps followed, five different exercises with various pieces of equipment or dumbbells until my arms were shaking with the effort and I was groaning with each lift. The last one involved pull-ups using a bar above my head and I knew there was no way in hell I would manage even one of them. I gave it a try regardless and did manage one set, lifting myself just a few inches each time before I had to admit defeat. My chest and arms were on fire and I wanted to sink into a cold bath and stay there for the rest of the day.

"What's next?" I gasped.

"That's it," Emmett grinned. "You did great. You just need to do some stretching." He showed me some simple exercises to stretch out the muscles I'd been working and then led me back into the kitchen and began mixing up one of his protein shakes with powder from a huge tin and milk in the blender. It was a chocolate flavoured one and he poured it out into two glasses and pushed one towards me. "Have that, get a shower and then come back down; I'll give you a massage."

I smiled despite my discomfort. "Is that special treatment because I'm your brother?"

"No, I offer it to all my clients. Half of them just won't pay the extra for it," he winked.

I drank the shake, which tasted reasonably good, but made my stomach feel as if it would explode. I was so unused to filling it up regularly that my slight sick feeling increased rapidly and by the time I got up to my room, I felt pretty terrible. I stripped off my sodden clothes and went into the bathroom, quickly finding myself on my knees in front of the toilet, vomiting violently. When it was over I pulled the toilet seat down and rested my head on it, shivering and groaning, doubts immediately beginning to fill me again. I couldn't do this; how the hell was I going to get through even a week of it, let alone three or four months?

"Edward?" My bedroom door opened and I pushed the bathroom door half closed with my foot at the sound of Jasper.

"Leave me alone," I muttered.

"I heard you puking. Shit, Edward, you're not doing this on purpose, are you?"

"No!" I exclaimed. "I couldn't help it, I feel sick! Get out, Jasper!"

"I'm going to tell Emmett."

"Well, go on and do it then!" I snapped at him. "Close the door on your way out!" I got to my feet and slammed the bathroom door, then switched on the shower. Fuck him. Fuck everybody. I would do it if it killed me, I thought. I'd prove them all wrong and I'd keep my promise to Jacob. _'Start taking care of yourself.'_ I wasn't going to let him down, whatever else I failed at.

I showered quickly, dried off and put on a pair of shorts and my bathrobe before heading back down to the gym. Emmett had also taken a shower and was wearing a clean t-shirt and sweats.

"Are you ok? Jasper said you were sick," he said at once.

"I'm fine. My stomach was just over-loaded and I'm not used to exercise," I said. "If he said I was making myself sick on purpose..."

"It's alright, don't worry about it," Emmett said. "I puked myself enough times when I started working out hard."

The rest of the day seemed to be a constant intake of food to me. I had never eaten so much in my life, even before I met Bella. After my massage I watched some television and relaxed for a while until Emmett appeared with lunch for us both, which consisted of pasta with tuna. He had taken pity on me and given me a portion I might have a hope of finishing, which I did manage to do. When I got another protein shake about three hours later and then rice, chicken and vegetables for dinner, once again I had to force down every bite.

"I'm going to get fat," I sighed.

"Edward, you're not going to get fat. I'm not feeding you pizza and icecream. You need all this stuff, firstly to put some flesh on your bones, which you need a lot of, believe me, and secondly to give you energy and feed the muscles. I know what I'm doing."

"Yes, I know, sorry."

I shoved another forkful of rice into my mouth just as Mom and Dad came in to find the three of us eating together. Jasper was eating the same food under protest, because he would rather have had something that 'had some taste to it', but was too idle to actually make himself anything.

"Sorry I worried you," I told Mom as she came over and gave me a kiss.

"It's ok, sweetheart. How are you feeling?"

"Not bad."

"Emmett's turning him into a minime," Jasper smirked.

I kicked him under the table. "I just asked him to help me get better. I needed some time to sort my head out and I know what I want now."

"Well, that's good. It's nice to see you all enjoying a meal together."

"I think the word 'enjoying' is a bit strong," grimaced Jasper. "Some kind of sauce might have been nice, Emmett."

"You want sauce, go make some."

I spent the rest of the evening in my room reading some more fitness information on the laptop and glancing at my phone every few minutes. I wondered if Jacob was thinking about me. I wanted to let him know what I was doing and that I was determined to make things better for myself, but I didn't really know what to say. He asked me to let him know, but it hadn't even been one full day; I didn't want to be a nuisance. What the hell. I picked the phone up and began to tap out a message.

'I just wanted to say thanks again for helping me. Emmett is going to help me get fit and eat properly. I will be ok. Edward.'

I received an answer within minutes as if he had been waiting to hear from me. 'Thanks for letting me know, I'm glad you feel able to make a start moving forward. Good luck and keep in touch. J. x.'

Stupidly my heart fluttered as I read the message. I didn't miss the kiss at the end of it and although I tried to tell myself he probably ended a lot of his texts to people like that, it still put a smile on my face.

When I woke on Monday, I felt as if I were being pinned to the bed by an invisible force. My arms, chest and shoulders ached fiercely and when I reached out to pick up my phone to see if I had any more messages, I almost dropped it.

"Shit," I muttered. "Emmett, you're killing me." I sat up slowly, grimacing at the ache in my stomach muscles, and rubbed at my biceps, almost expecting to see they had doubled in size. The amount of discomfort I was feeling indicated they should at least be swollen from over-use, but they looked the same as always - virtually invisible. I sighed heavily and got to my feet. Thank God I didn't have to do anything today; I doubted I would have been able to lift a mug of coffee.

I showered and went downstairs to find Mom in the kitchen making breakfast for everyone. Usually she made two variations of every meal so that Emmett could stick to his eating plan with the exception of the weekends. I knew he had treats on Saturday nights and Mom always made a roast on Sundays if she was home. Today, she was cooking pancakes for herself, Dad and Jasper and making a pan of oatmeal for Emmett and me, so I guessed he must have asked her to feed me the same things he ate.

I spent the rest of the day working on my computer. I had a website to build that I had been fooling about with for the past two weeks, unable to get myself to focus on it properly. The client had emailed me twice to ask how things were going and I had fobbed them off with excuses. Now I put some effort in and made a decent amount of progress during the eight or so hours I worked at it, interrupted only by Emmett bringing me food and hanging around to make sure I finished it.

Tuesday was pretty much the same as Sunday - an hour workout at eleven involving crunches, which were agony to do this time, then back and triceps exercises, all of which I made incredibly hard work of given that my entire upper body felt as if it had been trampled. Wednesday, rest again and Thursday abs, shoulders and legs. That was it for me for the week and I was relieved beyond belief. I was still throwing up after the workouts and it was a struggle to move myself at all. Everything hurt and my stomach felt like it would burst if it was forced to take any more food. I wavered more than once and wondered if it would be better for me to stop trying to be something I wasn't and stick with my computers. It was Saturday afternoon and I was just lying on my bed, aching and miserable, trying to convince myself that failure wasn't an option...and failing. The only thing I hadn't failed at was putting weight on. I didn't look any different, but the scales told me I had gained two pounds. It was probably all in my stomach.

My phone rang and I ignored it while I counted five rings, but it continued persistently and I snatched it up. Jacob's name was flashing on the screen and I fumbled to press the answer button, my heart leaping into my mouth.

"Hey, Jacob," I said, sounding breathless to my own ears.

"Edward. How are you?" He sounded like he was smiling.

"Um...I'm..." I contemplated lying for a few seconds. "Not great," I admitted.

"What's wrong?"

"Uh...nothing really, I'm just being a jerk," I said. "I guess I didn't realise how tough this would be."

"What are you doing exactly?" he asked me and I told him about the excessive amount of food I wasn't used to and the workouts from which I was now as stiff as a board.

"It gets easier," he said. "You're just not used to using your muscles that way. This time next week it'll be a whole lot better."

"God, I hope so, because I feel like I've been run over by a truck!" I exclaimed.

He talked to me for maybe ten minutes, telling me that Dad had sent his Mercedes to him for a service and he had looked at everything while he was at it and found so many things wrong that it was going to take him three days to fix after he got hold of the parts. I knew that car was pretty old, but it was one of Dad's favourites and he would rather fork out thousands of dollars to keep it going than get rid of it.

When I hung up the phone, I felt better. It was almost like he had known to call me at that exact moment when I was floundering and I pulled myself together. It wasn't going to be this tough forever, I just needed to persevere until I could actually see the difference in myself, however hard it might be.

It was another week before I actually saw any change and then it was only the fact that my ribs and shoulders no longer looked as if they were about to tear through my skin. In fact I had filled out all over, but despite pinching and pulling at myself, I couldn't actually find any _fat_ anywhere. I was five pounds heavier than when I started and still aching like hell from head to foot, but I felt better in general. I wasn't puking any more and by Thursday I had got out of bed hungry for the first time in as long as I could remember. I was in the kitchen before anybody else, making the oatmeal myself, much to Mom and Jasper's amazement. Emmett just gave a rather self-satisfied smirk as if he thought _he_ had succeeded at something, which I guessed he had in a way.

I still couldn't really see any appearance of muscle, despite standing in front of my much-hated bathroom mirror practically every day during that second week, flexing my arms and trying to convince myself there was a difference. Emmett had told me enough times it would be a month before it showed, but I was impatient that I still looked puny.

I talked to Jacob again on Saturday and told him I was getting on much better. I wished I could see him, but I wanted to look the best I could look first and despite my hope that he might still want me, a big part of me feared that he was only being my friend and that it wouldn't matter how I looked; he wouldn't want to kiss me or go out with me again. Why would he when he had seen me at such an all-time low?

Two more weeks passed and I had stopped looking at myself in the mirror and trying to will myself to grow. I was consistently gaining weight, but other than that nothing seemed to be happening and my suggestion to Emmett that I use bigger weights hadn't gone down well.

_"Form is more important than weight, Edward, you need to use the muscles the right way, not over-work them or compensate with others. It's not a race, you need to give it time."_

I threw myself onto my bed and stretched out on my back, hands behind my head. It was Sunday and I had just come back up from the gym after my massage and was still only wearing my shorts. I hadn't even talked to Jacob for eight days, not wanting him to hear me sound disheartened. My door opened and Jasper wandered in.

"What are you doing up here? Mom's making pot roast," he said. "It'll be on the table in twenty minutes. Fuck me, are those abs, Edward?"

"Huh? What?"

"Yeah, definitely abs," he nodded. "Your arms are bigger too. Don't you ever look at yourself?"

"I haven't for a while." I sat up quickly. "Are you messing with me, Jasper?"

"No, go look in the mirror. It's been a month, you should be seeing a difference by now." He propelled me into the bathroom and pulled the towel off the mirror. "What is this shit? No wonder you don't know how you look."

I stared at my reflection and my eyebrows rose. I did look different. Not that much really, but it was certainly a far cry from the way I had been. I was ten pounds heavier and everything was beginning to look toned. My arms and legs no longer looked they would snap and everything else had just - filled out. Jasper was right, I did have abs. If anything they were more obvious than anything else. Feeling foolish, I flexed an arm and noted the shape of my bicep and tricep. Jasper grinned.

"So are you going to let on who you're making yourself hot for?"

"I don't know what you mean." I went back into my room and grabbed a sweater, feeling my face heating up vividly. I wished I didn't have to blush so much.

"Come on, Edward, I was just joking really, but judging by the colour of your face, I hit the nail on the head. I know I take the piss, but you can tell me stuff if you want."

"You have a big mouth, Jasper," I grumbled.

"I can keep it shut when I need to."

"I'm probably just wasting my time anyway," I said.

"Why?"

"Because...I think I blew my chance already. I went on a date about a month ago and messed up."

"You had a date? When was this?" Jasper's mouth fell open.

"It was when Mom thought I was meeting up with Mike and Tyler. I didn't say anything because I thought you'd all say it was way too soon; which it was, by the way."

"So are you going to tell me who it is?" he prompted.

"Jasper! Edward! Get down here, dinner's on the table!" Emmett bellowed suddenly and I heaved a sigh of relief as I grabbed a pair of jeans. I wasn't so sure I wanted to tell Jasper, or anyone, that I liked Jacob just yet. If he really only wanted to be my friend, I would only look stupid after all.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you as always to everyone for reading and reviewing. You might recognise a little scene from the beginning of New Moon in this chapter, you know the one where Edward walks across the parking lot in slow motion towards Bella? Only he's not walking to Bella, obviously :P**

CHAPTER EIGHT

**Jacob's POV**

It was ten days since I had heard anything from Edward. He had been texting me a couple of times a week letting me know how he was doing and we talked on the phone at the weekends. Except this last week I had heard nothing from him. I guess I should have called him, but I was torn between wanting to support him and not wanting him to feel pressured by me. Half of me thought that he did like me, while the other half was convinced he just needed somebody - anybody - to be there for him and that we would only ever be friends. This made me sad because somehow during the last few weeks, even though we hadn't seen each other, I was falling for him. I had told myself not to get involved, that he was too broken and didn't even know if he could really be attracted to a guy, but I hadn't been able to help myself. I had certainly come a very long way from practically hating him and being irritated by the way I had ended up having to help him out several times. Now I couldn't seem to get him out of my mind and I longed to see him.

"Jake!"

I jumped at the sound of Seth's voice. He had been working for me for the past couple of weeks, since I had gotten busier lately and he had been laid off after the explosion at the factory where he worked. He'd been lucky he hadn't been working the night-shift - a lot of people were badly injured. He made a good apprentice and I was glad to be employing someone I already knew and got on with so well.

"What?" I grunted.

"You're miles away. Anywhere nice?"

"Just thinking. What did you want?"

"Embry's here. Fender hanging off, looks like he hit something."

At that moment Embry walked in, a sour look on his face. "Fucking elk ran in front of my car," he grumbled. "Look at the state of it! God knows what it was doing down here, it must be lost of something."

"You can't have hit it very hard, it didn't do that much damage," I said, glancing over at his car which had a crease in the hood and a smashed headlight as well as the fender.

"I didn't hit it, I hit a fence trying to avoid it."

"What are you doing out of work this early anyway?" I asked him.

"Day off. When do you think you can fix me up?"

"I'll have to order the parts, couple of days I should think. I'll call now, they'll probably be in Thursday morning. Borrow the Rabbit if you want, Em, until it's done."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I don't really use it any more." I went to get him the keys to the small car which I kept in the little office I had built in the corner of the garage. I dug around in a drawer of disorganised invoices, knowing they were in there somewhere. The sound of an engine outside indicated the arrival of another customer and I called out to Seth to see to them.

"Fuck me!" I heard Embry exclaim a moment later as I finally found the keys.

"What?" I headed out of the office to find Embry and Seth both staring out of the garage, presumably at whoever had parked outside out of my line of vision.

"Edward Cullen's here," Seth said with a smirk. "He's kind of hot, too. How did that happen?"

My heart began to bang against my ribs and my mouth went dry. Shit, I shouldn't feel this excited over someone I hadn't seen in a month, who probably wouldn't want the same thing I did, but I couldn't help it. I walked over to the guys and gave Embry the keys, peering outside as I did so. Both of them knew now that I had been on a date with Edward and that we had decided to just be friends for the moment as he wasn't over Bella.

Now I watched as Edward hovered beside his Volvo, its door standing open. He was wearing charcoal dress pants and a dark green shirt, his chaotic hair looking as if he had been tugging at it all afternoon and his glasses perched on his nose, making him look oddly cute rather than geeky. He dragged a hand through his hair and then took the glasses off, put them inside the car and closed the door.

"Guys..." I looked from Seth to Embry. "Will you just...hell, disappear for a few minutes."

"Can't we watch?" grinned Embry.

I growled something unintelligible and to my relief they disappeared to the back of the garage and out of the rear door to the shed I kept the Rabbit in.

Edward was still hesitating beside his car, but now he seemed to shake himself before turning towards me. He looked slightly worried as he began to walk the thirty or so yards from where he had parked and I bit my lip as I watched. As corny as it sounds, it was like one of those movie moments where the hero stands waiting for the object of his desire to reach him. He seemed to be walking in slow motion towards me, dropping his eyes after a moment as a shy smile gradually curved his lips up at the corners. I took in everything in those few seconds - the way he had filled out so that he no longer looked half-starved, his face chiselled rather than hollow and having more colour to it, his eyes bright as they finally lifted again to meet mine a moment before he halted maybe four feet away. My mouth went dry. He looked so different, mainly physically, but I could see that he was different inside too. He looked amazing.

"Hello, Jacob," he said softly.

"Hey, Edward. It's good to see you." I tried to behave normally, but to my ears I sounded out of breath and I jammed my hands into my pockets to stop myself reaching out to touch him, which I was longing to do. This had the added benefit of disguising the fact that my cock was beginning to react to him with sudden eagerness.

"You too."

"How are you? You look really good."

He lowered his eyes again and a faint blush coloured his cheeks. "I feel good. I meant to call at the weekend, but..." He stopped and shrugged. "Anyway, I thought I'd just come over instead."

He looked up again slowly and licked his lips. I couldn't take my eyes off his mouth. I was surprised by the strength of feeling which was bubbling up inside me and I licked my own lips and swallowed.

"I'm glad you did," I said. "I missed you."

'Shit, what did you say that for?' I thought. 'Make it obvious, why don't you?'

"Um...well..." Edward cleared his throat. "So...um...I was wondering if we could maybe...ah...try that dinner date again. You know the one that I messed up by being...um...messed up?"

"You really want to give it another try?" I asked in surprise.

"Only if you want to." He bit his lip for a second before letting it slip from between his teeth and smiling again. His cheeks turned a deeper shade of pink. God, he was cute. Wrong word. _Hot._

"I'd really like that. How about tonight?" I said.

"Sure."

"I'm almost finished up here, if you want to hang around while I get cleaned up we can head out to Forks," I suggested, not wanting to let him out of my sight now he was here. It was almost five and I could certainly get away with closing up my own business an hour early.

"Ok." He smiled dazzlingly and waited while I hurried out the back to find Embry and Seth.

"Seth, lock up, will you?" I said. "I'm done for the day."

"Oh?" He grinned and raised his eyebrows.

"You're not going out with him again, are you?" Embry asked.

"Yes."

"You know what happened last time."

"Nothing happened last time; he just wasn't ready, that's all."

"What makes you think he is now? Do you really want another let down, Jake?"

"Put a lid on it, Embry, he never let me down," I hissed. "He just needed a friend more than a date. Now get the hell out of here. I'll call you when your car's ready."

I left them and returned to Edward, inviting him to come over to the house and wait while I took a quick shower. He sat at the breakfast bar in the kitchen while I dived into my bathroom, scrubbed myself vigorously and applied cologne before dragging on clean underwear, socks, black jeans and a white shirt. I hated long sleeves and I rolled them up the way I always did, shoved my phone and wallet into my pockets and found a pair of shoes. I was back in the kitchen within ten minutes to find Edward sipping a glass of water and looking at a car magazine I had left on the counter.

He looked so good, I thought. Healthier in general and there was just a hint of how much he had toned up visible through the thin fabric of his shirt. Blood immediately rushed to my cock again and I didn't know quite how I was going to keep my hands to myself. Even later, after the meal, I was aware I couldn't just rush in like a bull in a china shop. It would probably be quite a while before we got past the kissing stage, even if the date did work out this time. Did I care? I looked him up and down as he got to his feet and smiled at me again. Hell no. I would wait as long as he wanted.

Edward drove and chose the same restaurant as before. We arrived shortly after it opened and had our choice of tables. We took the same one as the first time and I wondered if he wanted to replay it and do things differently. He was certainly very different this time. He talked more and laughed, telling me hilarious anecdotes about his workouts with Emmett; how his elder brother had dragged Jasper out of bed to give him an example of what he could look like; how he felt he could quite possibly die from exhaustion and over-eating and his horror at the sight of the first breakfast Emmett made for him. He added with a shy grin that he had repeated my own words to himself over and over when he felt like giving up. The fact that he could even joke about his struggles astounded me.

"I have a long way to go yet," he said then. "Another three months or so and then I'll still keep working out regularly. I feel so much better already."

"You look amazing." I complimented him again and this time couldn't resist touching him. I covered his hand with mine where it lay on the table and he curled his fingers around it.

"Jasper asked if I was doing this for someone else," he said.

I grinned. "What did you tell him?"

"I lied. Well, I mean, I'm doing it for myself, so I guess it wasn't really a lie. But I hoped...if I felt and looked better then maybe you would...like me."

"Edward, I always liked you," I told him. "Well, from that day in Finley's anyway. If I'm honest, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. I've been wanting to see you for weeks. I didn't want to make you feel under pressure though."

His hand squeezed mine more firmly. "I wouldn't have. I pretty much convinced myself you wouldn't want to try this again. I guess I went ahead and asked anyway because I figured I couldn't possibly look any more foolish in front of you than I have already."

"You were never foolish, Edward, just hurt, that's all," I said and leaned over to brush my lips against his cheek. He shivered and smiled and I pulled back quickly as the waiter appeared with the dessert menus. This time Edward didn't run to the bathroom and come back upset and awkward. He chose a chocolate brownie sundae and I had the same, only the strawberry version. They arrived in tall glasses with long-handled spoons and we worked our way slowly down the mess of icecream, cream, sauces and chunks of fruit or chocolate and nuts, stopping halfway to taste each other's. I couldn't keep the silly grin off my face and Edward seemed just as keen to smile.

We finished with coffee and when I pulled my wallet out to pay the check, Edward protested and insisted that he should pay this time. It was still early when we left the restaurant and headed back to the car. I wanted the date to last as long as possible, but didn't think it would be a good idea to invite him back to my house. I longed to kiss him, but at the same time I didn't want to put myself in a position where I would find it difficult to stop.

"Do you want to go and see a movie or something?" I suggested.

"Yes, ok, do you know what's on?" he asked at once.

"Um...I know 'Fast Five' is showing; are you interested in the 'Fast and Furious' movies at all?"

He grinned. "I bet you think they're not to my taste. Jasper has a thing for Matt Schulze; by the time I watched the first one about fifteen times I was hooked. I was tempted to actually buy a Skyline, but Dad wasn't keen. 'There's no point wasting your money on a car like that, Edward, you need something more practical'," he imitated, sounding exactly like Carlisle. "So I got the Volvo. It's ok, I suppose, not very exciting."

"You like to drive fast?" I said in surprise.

"Yes, I've never done much else that was fun."

"We better do something to fix that then, assuming you have a good enough time to agree to another date." By now I had begun to think I probably wasn't pushing my luck by asking so soon.

He smiled and pulled the car door open, sliding into the seat quickly. "I'd like that," he said and closed the door before I could say anything else. I trotted around the other side and got in.

'Fast Five' had already been showing for three weeks and on a Tuesday night there were few people wanting to see it. Perhaps four other couples were seated in the theatre, all in the front half and we headed up to the back row where no one would notice us. My pulse quickened as the lights went down and the trailers began. I wanted to touch him - hold his hand, put my arm around him, something - but I dithered for perhaps thirty minutes until the movie was in progress before I eventually reached out and took his hand. I laced our fingers together and looked up at his face. He was staring fixedly at the screen, but a smile touched his lips, broadening when I stroked my thumb over his knuckles. My jeans began to feel uncomfortably tight and my mind wandered. I did my best to focus on the movie to prevent myself suffering for two hours with an aching cock, but it was impossible. All I could think about was kissing him, holding him against me, taking his shirt off...

'Jesus, Jacob, quit thinking that, it's not going to happen,' I told myself.

Somehow I got through the movie, with Edward's hand in mine and my body constantly alert to his closeness, but if anyone had asked me what the storyline was, I couldn't have told them. As we left the theatre and walked back to the car I shoved both hands into my pockets to disguise the persistent bulge in my pants, hoping I wasn't as obvious as I felt. Much to my relief, by the time we reached the parking lot it had at last subsided and we chatted as Edward drove me back to the Reservation and parked in front of my house. Damn, it was over. It was still only just after ten and I didn't want him to drive away just yet. I raised my hand to his face, turning him towards me. His eyes met mine briefly and then lowered, his lips parting as I leaned closer to him. The last time we had kissed had been good, but we had both had a number of beers and really it had only been fooling around. This time when our lips touched, it felt amazing. My lips caressed his gently and I determinedly kept my tongue in my own mouth, much as I wanted to thrust it into his and devour him. I drew back reluctantly after a moment and his eyes opened and met mine again.

"Do you want to come in for a coffee?" I heard myself say.

"Yes, please."

He locked the car and followed me into the house and through to the kitchen. I switched on the lights and set the kettle to boil, deciding on instant, and dumped coffee into two mugs. Then I turned around and leaned back against the counter. Edward was a few feet away watching me, a smile on his face. I still couldn't believe how different he was and I couldn't wait a minute longer to kiss him properly.

"Come here," I said, reaching out my hand towards him. He stepped closer and slid his hand into mine, letting me draw him towards me until we were only inches apart. I lifted my free hand to his face and stroked my thumb lightly over his bottom lip, then slid my fingers to the back of his neck and pulled him in for a kiss. I kept it gentle as before, my lips moving against his slowly, but his response was immediate and more heated than I expected, his arms creeping around me and his body leaning in closer until it rested lightly against mine. I gripped him more firmly and deepened the kiss, giving in to what I had been longing to do and plunging my tongue into his mouth. His fingers dug into my back where he held me, his tongue toying with mine, encouraging me and I crushed my lips harder onto his, tasting him, feeling his heart hammering against my chest, his body trembling slightly in my arms. I could now feel what I had only had a hint of before - that his bones were no longer uncovered by flesh and that his arms and chest were firm and beginning to fill out. Even after only a month he felt great.

Edward moaned into my mouth as I continued kissing him and the sound made my blood rush to my cock again. It instantly began to strain against the front of my jeans and it was all I could do not to lower my hands to his butt and grind myself against him. He must have been able to feel it and I noticed he wasn't in the same state, despite his obvious enjoyment of our kisses. I put my hands on his waist and reluctantly pushed him away a few inches.

"Sorry," I said and grinned.

"It's ok." He flushed vividly and avoided my eyes as I turned back to the kettle to finish making the coffees. His shyness only aroused me more and as I stirred sugar into the mugs I couldn't suppress the images which flooded my mind of us lying on my bed naked together, kissing and touching.

'Fuck, Jacob, put a lid on it,' I cursed silently. I would certainly be giving myself some attention the minute he left to go home.

I passed him his coffee and we went to sit in the lounge for a while, this time Edward sharing the sofa with me. I slid my arm around him and drew him against my side, brushing my lips against his cheek or jaw every so often as we talked.

"Do you want to go out Saturday?" I suggested.

"Yes, I'd love to."

"Maybe we could go over to PA or something."

"Sounds good." He grinned suddenly. "Get away from Forks."

"Don't want to be seen with me?" I teased.

"It's not that. Well...it kind of is. My family don't know yet. I know they'll be fine, they never had a problem with Jasper being into guys, but I just know they'll think I don't know what I'm doing; that it's some kind of knee-jerk reaction to what Bella did to me."

"It's ok," I said. "There's no rush to tell them anything, is there? So long as you're sure it is what you want."

"Yes, I'm sure," he smirked. "Was I not obvious enough?"

He turned his head and his lips brushed my ear. I shivered slightly and my persistent erection pulsed against the buttons on my jeans. At the risk of making things worse for myself, I tilted my head to capture his lips with mine, unable to resist deepening it again upon his warm response. It was my turn to groan as his tongue teased mine, his hand coming to rest over my heart. That organ was hammering and as if my obvious arousal wasn't enough, the rapid beat would have told him the effect he was having on me. I could feel a damp patch forming in my shorts as I oozed pre-cum and I figured if I didn't come in my pants it would be a miracle. This time it was Edward who pulled away, his face flushed, lips swollen from our kisses.

"I think I should probably...get home soon," he said breathlessly.

"Yeah." I grinned sheepishly and let go of him, flinching as I got to my feet. I saw him out, giving him another quick kiss at the door and promising to call him to make arrangements for Saturday. I stayed where I was, surreptitiously adjusting myself in the darkness until he had reached his car and driven away, then I closed the door and locked it before heading to my room. I couldn't ever remember being so uncomfortably hard and my jeans were unfastened by the time I reached my room. I kicked off my shoes, shoved both jeans and shorts down and impatiently pulled my shirt off over my head rather than waste time with buttons. My cock strained upwards, quivering against my stomach, the tip wet and glistening.

"Fuck, Edward," I muttered as I collapsed onto my bed and wrapped my fingers around my shaft. I ran my hand upwards, coating my palm in pre-cum to give some lubrication before gripping myself more firmly. Half a dozen vigorous strokes and I was done, spurting all over my stomach and chest, one pulse after another, groaning loudly.

Although it was a temporary release, I was still hard and my cock appeared to have no intention of subsiding any time soon. I grabbed my discarded shorts to wipe myself clean and lay back with my eyes closed, stroking my fingertips lightly over my stomach. Now I would take my time and let my mind conjure up whatever it wanted.

I took myself back to the lounge where I had sat cuddling Edward, his lips on mine and his hand on my chest. I imagined unbuttoning his shirt, sliding my hand inside, stroking it over his skin. I knew he had a light sprinkling of hair on his chest from when I had seen him in the truck after I ripped his soaked shirt off of him. I grasped my cock again and began to stroke it slowly as I imagined myself taking Edward's shirt off altogether, pushing him back against the sofa cushions and bending to kiss his chest, gently biting his nipples and making him moan. He slid his hands into my hair, squirming beneath me as I moved lower, teasing his navel with my tongue, unfastening his pants and following the happy trail downwards with my lips until his cock bumped my chin.

"Shit," I muttered, quickening my hand movement. I longed to get my hands on him, but I knew I was going to have to wait. He didn't even get hard when we kissed, even though he was obviously really into it and I guessed it was probably a combination of his previous horror with sex and perhaps nerves over being with a guy or something like that. In my mind, however, he was as hard as I was, his cock escaping from the front of his shorts and twitching eagerly as I curled my hand around it. I imagined him cut, the swollen mushroom-shaped head oozing pre-cum as he pushed his hips upwards, encouraging me to take him in my mouth.

"God, Edward, I want you," I panted, another orgasm approaching faster than I expected. In my fantasy I just had time to flick my tongue around his head a couple of times, open my mouth around him and sink down until he hit the back of my throat and then I came again. It had been way too long for me.

Gasping, I got up and went into the bathroom to take a quick shower, my legs weak and my cock finally softening, much to my relief. I scrubbed myself clean, dried off and returned to bed, finding that once my head hit the pillow I could barely keep my eyes open. As I drifted into sleep, the last thing I saw in my head was Edward's cute shy smile.


	9. Chapter 9

**As always, thank you for all the great reviews! And thanks to everyone who is reading and saving alerts etc :)**

CHAPTER NINE

**Edward's POV**

My heart was still pounding from Jacob's kisses when I got in the car and I drove home slowly, replaying the whole evening in my head and finding I couldn't get the smile off of my face. I did my best to look normal as I went into the house and Mom didn't seem to notice anything out of the ordinary, only briefly asking if I had a good night. Emmett was in his room with Rosalie, but I ran into Jasper on the stairs and he saw right through me in a second.

"Don't try telling me you were hanging out with Mike and Tyler," he said with a smirk. "You look like you spent half the evening kissing someone."

I had no idea what to say, but I could feel colour flooding my face and knew there was no point denying it. I had never been any good at lying. Jasper grinned and turned around, following me up to my room and closing the door after us.

"Come on, Edward, who are you seeing?"

"Um..." Shit, should I just tell him, I wondered? He would understand more than anybody else.

"Please tell me you didn't get back with Bella." His face suddenly took on a look of horror.

"No! How could you think that? It's...it's somebody else."

"Jeez, it's like getting blood out of a stone with you, Ed. I know I fool around and tease you, but you can trust me, you know. I won't even tell Emmett if you don't want me to."

"It's a guy," I blurted before I could stop myself.

"What the fuck, Edward?" Jasper's face was a picture as his eyes bugged out and his mouth hung open. "How did this happen? You're bi?"

"I don't know, I guess so."

"You're not just doing it because of the way Bella treated you, are you? I know she put Jacob Black off girls, but he must have already had some idea he liked cock. Wait a minute...he's helped you out a few times lately..."

I could almost hear the cogs in Jasper's brain turning and my face burned hotter than ever. I avoided his eyes and dragged my hands through my hair.

"Yes, it's him, ok?"

"Wow." For once Jasper seemed rendered speechless and I glanced sideways at him.

"Well?" I prompted. "Say something."

"Lucky fucker," Jasper sputtered. "Jacob Black's probably the hottest guy on the Reservation."

"That doesn't really help, Jasper," I frowned.

"Ok. So are you sure about this? I mean, is it just him you like?"

"I think so. I mean, I never thought about guys before. At least I don't remember doing so." I decided not to mention the fact that his boyfriend kissing me had made me curious at the time.

"Does he turn you on?"

"Jas!"

"Ed, I wish you'd chill. You get so embarrassed about stuff."

"I can't help that. You've always been able to say anything you wanted without turning a hair. I can't do that. Anyway, it's early days, we went on one date. Well, two, but the other one was before when I was still a complete mess."

"Hell, Edward, you're a dark horse sometimes," Jasper said. "So it was him you were doing all this working out for?"

"No, I was doing it for myself. Jacob just helped me feel better about things. I told him everything that happened. I guess it was easier talking to him than Mom or that other shrink she sent me to. He understood; he went through some of it too."

"I don't know him very well, but he actually sounds awesome. You know the others aren't going to care if you're seeing a guy, right?"

"Somehow I think Mom and Dad will have a problem with anyone I'm seeing for a while yet. I will tell them, just not right now."

"Well, you don't have to worry about me, it'll be our little secret," Jasper grinned. "Are you really sure about this, though? I'm not trying to spoil things for you, I just don't want to see you get hurt again."

"I'll be fine," I said.

"Ok, remember you can talk to me and if you decide to tell the others and want me around, give me a yell." Jasper gave my shoulder a squeeze and left me alone. I was actually glad now that I had told him; it felt good to have his support.

Ten minutes later I was in bed, lying in the darkness and thinking about the one thing I hadn't wanted to go over in my mind on my way home. I had loved the feel of Jacob's arms around me and his kisses had almost melted me into a puddle, but the fact that he was hard made me uncomfortable. Partly it had given me a thrill as I realised it was me that was making him excited, but at the same time I was anxious about him wanting to take things further some time soon. From the way he treated me I didn't think he would rush things, but I just knew that if anything did happen I wouldn't know what I was doing and I would disappoint him. And there was one other small problem - I didn't get aroused; not even a little bit. Absolutely nothing happened and it should have. His kisses made my heart race, my skin come out in goosebumps, the hair on the back of my neck stand up, but my cock didn't so much as twitch and Jacob knew that. I tried to tell myself he would understand, especially after I'd told him about that exact same thing happening when I was with Bella, but part of me still worried that he would think it wasn't what I really wanted; that I didn't want _him._

"Oh, God," I groaned under my breath. "Why is everything so complicated? Why can't I just be normal?"

I didn't think I would sleep as I lay there worrying, but eventually I must have drifted off. When I opened my eyes it was dawn and a faint grey light peeked between my curtains. I was lying on my stomach with my head turned to one side and I shifted uncomfortably and almost crushed my penis which was hard and aching beneath me. I rolled over in surprise. I hadn't even woken up hard in as long as I could remember and now the thing was positively throbbing, pushing against my pyjama pants and leaving a damp patch around the head. I ran a hand over my face and felt the heat in my cheeks; God, I was so uptight. I hadn't been this bad before Bella, had I?

I cast my mind back and remembered how awkward and shy I had always been, but at least I had managed not to blush when I was alone. From about age fourteen I hadn't been able to keep my hands off myself either, no doubt the same as any teenage boy. Immediately I thought about Jacob. He must have been pretty uncomfortable last night and I wondered if he was still hard when I left; if he touched himself and thought about me. I realised with a start that my hand was resting on my erection and I gave it a light squeeze through the thin fabric of my pants. It twitched against my palm and I snatched my hand away, biting my lip as I shoved the bed covers down and then wriggled out of my pants. I wasn't wearing the top and I folded one arm behind my head, glancing down at myself as I wrapped my free hand around my cock. I rubbed my thumb over the head, spreading pre-cum a little way down the shaft and then sliding my hand up and down more firmly. I closed my eyes and at once Jacob filled my mind. I thought about the way his lips felt on mine, his tongue exploring my mouth, his arms holding me tight against his body. Suddenly my hand stroking myself became his in my thoughts and I imagined him lying beside me, naked like me, brushing his lips against my ear while his hand moved faster on my cock, rubbing and squeezing.

I had forgotten how good it felt and I slowed down, wanting to prolong the moment as I felt my orgasm building, my balls tightening and my thighs beginning to quiver. I slid my legs apart and pulled my knees up, reaching down with the other hand to cup my balls and tug on them gently. My heart was pounding and I breathed hard, almost panting as I increased the movement of my right hand again, driving myself rapidly over the edge until I came forcefully, the hot fluid splattering onto my stomach and chest. I let out a loud groan before I could bite my tongue and quickly grabbed my pyjama pants to wipe myself, cursing silently and hoping Jasper hadn't heard me through the wall.

"What the hell," I muttered after a minute. I'd heard him getting himself off enough times; he didn't even try to be quiet half the time and it was just fortunate that Mom and Dad slept on the third floor; then again if they were in the next room to him he probably would have bitten his tongue.

I got up and headed for the shower to clean myself up properly, catching sight of myself in the bathroom mirror and grimacing. I was bright-eyed and flushed and I would have been willing to bet anybody who saw me right now would guess immediately what I'd been doing.

I showered, dressed and went downstairs to make coffee. It was still early and no one else was awake - not even Emmett since Rosalie had stayed over although it was unusual for her to do that during the week. I fetched the newspaper from the front porch and scanned the front page while I waited for the coffee to brew; then my phone beeped in my pocket and I drew it out quickly, my heart fluttering. No one sent me texts at seven o'clock in the morning.

'Hey, Edward, had a great time last night. Still want to go to PA Saturday? Thinking of you. J.x.'

'I had a great time too,' I typed. 'Would love to go to PA. What time do you want to leave? Edward.' I hesitated for a moment and then added a 'x', realising that it was the first time I had ever done this. Bella had never sent me sweet texts, only angry ones demanding where I was if I was late home after I moved in with her.

"Damnit, stop comparing things!" I muttered to myself.

'Nine - make a day of it?' Jacob suggested.

'Can't wait,' I typed and pressed 'send' before I could dither about sounding too keen.

'Me too. Call you tonight,' Jacob responded and I grinned stupidly. My worries from the previous night went out of my head and I felt nothing but excitement about seeing him again.

It was a very long week. I finished the website I had been working on and of course I trained on Thursday although I had Jasper spotting me on the weights since Emmett had a new client in to train - a very large lady who needed a lot of attention and was willing to pay handsomely for it. Jasper, of course, had also been trained by Emmett so there wasn't a great deal of difference for me, except that Jasper joked around rather too much until Emmett glowered at him from the other side of the gym where he was supervising Mrs Large on the treadmill, at a very slow walking pace.

Jacob called me every night after work and after the first day, where I stupidly couldn't think of much to say, the other times we chattered away for over an hour. I would then go to bed quite early and after Wednesday morning's opening of the floodgates, I became more and more eager to touch myself as soon as I was completely alone. My mind was always filled with some fantasy of Jacob kissing and touching me when I did this and by the time I woke Saturday morning I couldn't wait to feel his lips on mine again.

I hadn't made up my mind to tell the rest of the family what I was doing yet, but I told Jasper what I planned and he ended up providing an alibi for me, lying smoothly to the others about how we were going to hang out together and maybe see a movie or something. Emmett raised an eyebrow, but Mom and Dad seemed pleased Jasper was keen to spend time with me. We set off in Jasper's car at eight-fifty and waited at the end of the driveway for Jacob to come by and collect me. Jasper then intended to go into Forks and hang out with some friends for the day. He wasn't currently seeing anyone, but the group of friends apparently included a guy he had had his eye on for a while and he hoped something might come of it.

I was more nervous now than I had been when I went over to Jacob's garage on Tuesday and asked him out. That day I had told myself that I would probably end up looking like a fool which would be no worse than usual, but now I so wanted things to work out. I wanted him to want me; I wanted to be good company; I wanted more than anything to feel the same with him as I did when I was by myself thinking about him. I wiped my damp palms on my black jeans and then dragged my fingers through my hair.

"Calm down, Edward, you'll make it stand on end again," Jasper grinned. "Why are you so nervous?"

"I don't want him to think he's wasting his time," I muttered.

"Ed...he's been there the whole time you went through all the shit over the past few weeks and this is your second proper date. If he thought he was wasting his time he wouldn't be coming to take you out for the day."

"Yeah, I guess, I'm being stupid."

"Yeah, you are. Here he comes now." Jasper pointed down the road in the direction of La Push, from which Jacob's red truck was now approaching. I was surprised to see him driving that, having expected him to use the Corvette.

"See you later." I got out of the car and walked over to the truck as it pulled up on the end of the drive. Jacob shoved the door open for me.

"Is that Jasper?" he asked. I had told him on the phone I talked to Jasper about us.

"Yes, he's my alibi for today. I am going to tell the others soon," I said quickly.

"It's alright, just tell them when you're ready to," he said easily.

I pulled the door closed and quickly discovered why he had brought the truck instead of the car when he reached out to draw me closer to him on the single long seat, resting his arm around my shoulders as we began to move.

"I missed you," he said, giving me a light kiss on the cheek. "Seth's in charge of the garage this morning."

"Oh, you usually work Saturday mornings," I remembered.

"Yeah, but we don't have much in and I'd rather have the whole day with you."

The journey to PA seemed to pass quickly and Jacob found somewhere to park the truck all day before we set off to wander around the stores, window shopping and chatting. My nervousness had vanished within ten minutes of him picking me up and I was enjoying myself immensely. We passed a music store and I stopped to look in the window. I still hadn't played the piano, I realised and I missed it.

"You want to go in and look around?" Jacob suggested.

"Ok."

The store was huge and stocked just about every instrument you could imagine, including a beautiful baby grand piano. I stroked my hand over the top wistfully and thought I should make the effort to play again soon.

"Try it if you like," the proprietor offered, but I declined, too worried about drawing the attention of the other people in the store. They would probably think I was showing off.

"Maybe you could play something for me one day," said Jacob as we walked out onto the street again. "There's a piano in the room that used to belong to my sisters. They both played, but that piano hasn't been used for years now. Dad and I turned the room into a dining room that no one ever used. He didn't play and nor did I, so the thing's just gathering dust."

"I'd love to," I said, touched, immediately imagining playing one of my favourite pieces while Jacob watched and smiled at me. He smiled at me now and grasped my arm briefly, giving it a squeeze before he let go and stuck his hand in his pocket.

Our next stop was at a performance car dealership which Jacob said he looked at every time he came to PA and daydreamed about buying another car. The showroom was full of mainly used cars in immaculate condition and I couldn't take my eyes off the stunning midnight purple Skyline with its Veilside bodykit taking pride of place in the front window.

"I thought you might like that one," Jacob grinned.

"Damn, I wish I could just buy it," I said wistfully.

"Well, what's stopping you? I'm sure you can afford it."

I felt my face flushing. It was ridiculous to feel ashamed of having a lot of money, but right then I did. I knew he worked hard and did ok, but my family had more money than they could possibly hope to spend and it made me uncomfortable now.

"Edward, I'm sorry, I didn't mean that quite the way it sounded," Jacob said softly, touching my arm again.

"I know, I'm just stupid and over-sensitive." I relaxed and looked at the price tag again. Eleven thousand. I could afford it, quite easily. I had a trust fund - all three of us did - and I had never really touched mine except for Bella's ring and a couple of other things, unlike Jasper who dipped into his regularly as if he thought it was his last opportunity to do so. "I'm tempted," I said now. "I've never done anything crazy like just buy a car on the spur of the moment. I'm going to think about it though."

We ate a light lunch in an Italian restaurant and then walked down to the harbour, looking at a number of yachts moored there. Dad had been thinking about buying one for a while, although I didn't tell Jacob that. The less said about our money the better. Instead I suggested we take a trip on the whale-watching boat which was making ready to leave. It was a three-hour excursion along the coast and something I had always wanted to do, but never actually done. Jacob seemed just as keen and I bought tickets from the vendor. The boat was virtually empty, only two families taking the trip besides us and they stayed on the lower level where there was shelter from the wind and more comfortable seating. Jacob immediately charged up the stairs to the top and leaned on the railing.

The wind was cold up there, especially when we left the harbour, but we stayed on the upper level for the whole three hours. No one could see us on the top deck and Jacob wrapped his arms around me from behind, pressing himself against my back and kissing my ear, making me shiver as we scanned the horizon, briefly spotting an Orca pod in the distance just before the boat turned to head back. After the trip we spent an hour in the Feiro Marine Life Centre which I had been to once with my family as a child, but was new to Jacob and clearly fascinated him as much as it did me.

We ate dinner in a Thai restaurant before setting off on the drive back to Forks. It had been an amazing day and I felt a whole lot better about being with Jacob. He constantly made it obvious that he liked me, whether it was by suggesting doing things he knew I wanted to do or giving me the occasional light touch or cuddle when no one was looking, or driving with his arm wrapped around me, brushing his lips against my temple occasionally like he was now. I didn't want the date to come to an end, but at the same time the closer we got to home, the more my heart pounded with nervous excitement at the thought that he would kiss me properly.

I almost forgot to send Jasper a text as we approached Forks to let him know I was on my way back and he replied quickly that he would meet me at the end of our driveway in thirty minutes. By the time Jacob pulled the truck off the road and parked, that left almost fifteen minutes to wait. He cut the engine and turned off the lights, plunging us into semi-darkness. A moment later his hands cupped my face and his lips descended onto mine.

My pulse picked up speed and I shivered with pleasure as his lips caressed mine warmly and his tongue teased them apart and slid into my mouth. His hands left my face and his arms crept around me, holding me close against him as he kissed me until we were breathless. The slight movement I felt in my pants surprised me and I pulled back before I could stop myself. 'Damnit, Edward, relax,' I silently cursed myself.

Jacob released me and opened the truck door, climbing out and gesturing to me to follow him. He probably thought I'd pulled away because I wasn't comfortable with kissing him any longer and now he leaned back against the side of the truck and gave me a smile. I summoned up some courage and stepped in front of him, placing my feet slightly between his which were spread apart and rested my hands against his chest as I touched my lips to his again. He hummed appreciatively and placed his hands on my waist, pulling me against him and plunging his tongue into my mouth again. I instantly felt how aroused he was, his hardness upright in his pants and digging into my stomach. His hands slid to the middle of my back and held me tighter and I felt his heart racing under my palm. My cock quickly stiffened more and I almost pulled away again, but I forced myself to relax and stop worrying so much, staying where I was and letting him feel it press against his. He groaned into my mouth and moved slightly against me, one of his hands slowly lowering to my butt and squeezing as he continued kissing me even more urgently. I heard myself moan as my cock twitched eagerly and I imagined us doing this somewhere more private, in Jacob's house maybe. I wondered what would happen next - would he slide his hand between us, unfasten my pants, touch me, want me to touch him?

I realised with shock that I was getting perilessly close to orgasm, just from this small amount of contact, and I peeled myself off him with another groan rather than disgrace myself.

"Sorry," I whispered.

"Hey..." Jacob straightened up and pushed me back from him a few more inches, touching my chin and tilting it upwards to make me meet his eyes. I was relieved that the darkness disguised my heated face. "I'm not going to do anything you don't want," he said and I realised he thought I had pulled away out of fear.

"I do want," I said breathlessly. "I just...um...Jasper will be here in a minute."

"Yeah, probably best cool it," Jacob grinned, grasping my hand instead. "I had an awesome day today."

"Me too," I said at once. "Thank you."

"Do you want to come over to my place and hang out for a while tomorrow?" he asked. "Seth and Embry are coming over, but they'll be happy to see you. We can get takeout or something."

I agreed at once and Jacob suggested I go over early in the afternoon. Jasper pulled into the drive a minute later and I backed away reluctantly and got into his car, waving to Jacob as we set off up to the house.

"Have a good day?" he asked at once.

"Yes, amazing." I quickly filled him in on what we did and he told me we window-shopped, ate fried chicken and went to the movies to see 'Captain America'.

"Are you serious?" I groaned. "I would never watch that if you paid me."

"You wanted to humour me," he grinned.

"So what did you really do?"

"Probably a bit more than you."

"What do you mean?" I asked as he parked the car and cut the engine.

"I mean I spent most of the afternoon having fun with that guy I mentioned - his name's Danny."

"Having fun?" I echoed.

Jasper snorted. "Well, we didn't fuck, but it's heading that way. He wants to see me again tomorrow."

"You only just met him!" I exclaimed.

"Yeah, what can I say? I like sex and he's hotter than hell. You don't have to follow my example, Ed, I know I'm a slut. Don't tell Emmett, ok, I'm sick of him telling me to behave. So long as I'm careful, I don't see what the problem is."

"My lips are sealed," I smiled. "We can be each other's alibi." In truth, I was quite shocked by Jasper's behaviour with guys - he had never really told me any detail about what he got up to, but he seemed in an awful hurry to do things that I could barely bring myself to think about yet. I wouldn't have wanted to behave like him, but I wished I could have had even a fraction of his confidence. All I could think, even after what had happened just before Jacob left, was that when things did progress I would be a disappointment.


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you as always for the great reviews. I know a few of you have been eagerly awaiting this chapter! ;o)**

CHAPTER TEN

**Jacob's POV**

I drove home with a huge smile on my face, my cock almost crushed against the zipper of my pants. The day had been amazing and Edward getting so turned on with me had been the icing on the cake. I had never felt like this, I realised. This was the excitement I wanted; that which had been missing with Brady. Yes, I had enjoyed being with him and having sex with him, but this was different. I hadn't even touched Edward yet and he was driving me crazy. The feel of him in my arms, his soft lips on mine, the smell of his warm skin and his cologne, the knowledge that he was slowly getting better and beginning to want me almost made me explode in my pants. My heart was hammering and it wasn't just from the physical excitement; I had known I was falling for him, but now it was more than that. With Bella it had been some kind of twisted, out of control infatuation; with Brady it had been like best friends with benefits; with Edward...I grinned foolishly as I let myself into the house and headed for my room. I was in love with Edward.

I spent a few minutes relieving the pressure that had been building up in me all day and then took a shower. Already I couldn't wait to see him again and before I went to bed that night I found myself glancing at the clock and figuring out how many hours it would be before he came over. I felt a bit like a silly kid with his first crush and when I closed my eyes all I could see was Edward's face. My cock stiffened again as I lay there trying to fall asleep and I decided it was a good thing Embry and Seth were coming over to hang out; spending too long alone in the house with Edward would have proved pretty difficult and I knew it was still going to be some time before I could go any further with him.

I didn't sleep well and I was still drinking coffee and yawning at ten-thirty the next day when Brady's Bug pulled up outside. Surprised, I went to open the door before he reached it.

"Hey, Brady, what are you doing here?"

"Nice way to greet me," he teased. "Happy to see you too."

"Sorry, I just didn't expect to see you. Do you want coffee?" I headed back into the kitchen and he followed.

"No, thanks, I had some. Just thought I would come over and catch up. You're not busy, are you?"

"No."

"How's Edward?" he asked then and a wide smile split my face before I could even think of an answer.

"Good," I smirked.

"Hell, Jake, you have got it bad," grinned Brady. "You look like a little kid at Christmas. Oh, hey, he's not here is he? If he stayed over and I'm interrupting..."

"No, we're not at the staying over stage," I said.

"Really?" His eyebrows rose a touch. "Taking it slow?"

"Yes. I'm guessing that means you're not then. How is Paul?"

Brady smiled wider and reddened a touch. "Um...he's...you know, awesome."

"I'm not sure I would have chosen that word to describe him, but so long as he's treating you good, that's what matters," I said.

"He's a real softy under the tough image. Loves cuddles."

"Paul does?" I laughed. "Who would have thought it? You must be good for him."

Brady hung out with me for an hour or so before he headed off, saying he was on his way home after staying with Paul since Friday. I found things to do that didn't really need doing until I heard a car pull up outside and I rushed to the window, picturing Edward's Volvo parking up, but it was Embry's car and my pounding heart slowed and sank a little.

"Jesus, Jacob, get a hold of yourself," I muttered and went to let Embry in.

Seth arrived on foot a few minutes later and then Edward ten minutes after that. I left the other two in the lounge and went to the door, giving him a hug and a light kiss before we went in to join the them. Edward seemed shy and reserved at first and didn't have much to say, but Embry and Seth with their usual ability to talk none stop until told to shut up, soon drew him out of his shell and by the time we decided to order takeout, he was relaxed and joining in the conversation with much laughter. I couldn't take my eyes off him and I was aware that I probably looked as besotted as I felt.

Embry left around eight, giving Seth a ride home and finally leaving me alone with Edward. We spent another hour kissing and cuddling on the sofa, trying to keep things from getting too heated before he left rather reluctantly after making arrangements to see each other again Tuesday night.

As had become usual, when we weren't seeing each other we spent at least an hour talking on the phone every evening. Tuesday we went to the movies and had dinner together and it was Friday before Edward came over to the house again. I had decided I was going to cook a meal for him for the first time and asked him to come over at six, but he had said mysteriously that his afternoon was going to be busy and he probably wouldn't make it before seven. I didn't ask for details on what he was doing, figuring if he wanted me to know he would have told me. It was probably something to do with his computer business. So I decided to make the meal for eight to be on the safe side and made preparations, then opened a bottle of wine and sipped a glass while I waited. I wasn't much of a wine drinker, but I thought Edward would appreciate it with the meal more than beer and had called upon Seth for help in picking one, since his parents had always been into their wines. He had chosen a full-bodied red and I bought two bottles. It was seven-fifteen when I heard the roar of an engine outside and it sure as hell wasn't the Volvo.

"Who the hell is that?" I muttered to myself, not wanting my evening interrupting. Before I reached the door the engine roared louder and then silenced quickly. I pulled the door open and my jaw dropped. Edward was just climbing out of the Skyline we had seen in the showroom in PA, a grin on his face bright enough to light up the dark sky.

"Oh, my God, you bought it!" I exclaimed. "This is what you've been doing today?" I jumped off the porch and went over to him.

"Well, I went over Monday for a test drive and paid a deposit," he said. "Jasper came with me today to collect it. I was going to ask you to come with me, but I thought I'd surprise you."

"I didn't really think you would," I grinned. "You never mentioned it since." I walked around the car, wishing it was daylight so I could see better. "It's really a beauty."

"I know, I couldn't help myself in the end. I'm not prone to making rash decisions, but I don't want to be like I used to be any more. I had no sense of adventure and never did anything fun."

"If this is you getting a sense of adventure, I'm liking it," I said, wrapping my arms around him. "I hope you're going to take me for a spin over the weekend."

"I can't wait."

I gave him a warm kiss and moved away from him to look at the car some more, peering at the interior and popping the hood to take a peek at the engine until Edward teased me for paying more attention to the car than him. I lowered the hood quickly and led him to the house. "Come on inside, I'll start the dinner."

"I'm starving," Edward said at once. "What are we having?"

"Pork." I poured him a glass of wine when we reached the kitchen and took the marinated pork steaks out of the refrigerator. I was planning on cooking rice, corn and peas to go with it, knowing Edward would prefer not to upset his diet by eating unhealthy food unless it was actually the weekend. He sat on a stool at the breakfast bar sipping his wine while I cooked and we ate with trays on our laps in the lounge.

Afterwards we snuggled up on the sofa with more wine and watched television. For once sex wasn't at the forefront of my mind and I simply enjoyed being close to him, feeling him resting against me, the lights dimmed to a faint glow. We were halfway down the second bottle of wine and when Edward finished the last mouthful in his glass, I took it from him and placed it on the coffee table. I hadn't even kissed him properly yet and suddenly I longed to.

When my lips touched his, he responded warmly without hesitation, his eyes closing and his hand sliding up my chest to my neck. I pulled him tighter against me and plunged my tongue into his mouth, his soft moan immediately sending blood rushing to my cock. I was thankful I was wearing loose cargo pants as it strained upright against my stomach and I began to imagine myself taking Edward's clothes off, running my hands over his body, feeling his cock against mine. I wanted more of him against me and I leaned backwards, shifting my position and stretching out on the sofa cushions, drawing him down with me so that he rested partly on top of me, our lips still clinging. Edward was as hard as I was and the feel of his arousal pressing against my thigh made my cock pulse eagerly, pre-cum dampening my shorts. I slid my hands down his back and then to his hips, moving him a little more so his hardness touched mine. He broke the kiss and turned his face into my neck, breathing hard, his body trembling slightly as I moved my hands lower, squeezing his butt and squirming beneath him, causing a slight friction between us. His groan echoed mine and I pulled the back of his shirt out of his pants, slipping my hand underneath to touch his hot skin. I nipped gently at his neck and nudged my knee between his thighs, raising it slightly to push them further apart. He pressed himself harder against me for a second and then suddenly he seemed to freeze.

"Don't..." He pushed himself away from me and sat up. "Sorry...um...I..." His voice shook and he dragged a hand through his hair, avoiding my eyes as I sat up quickly. "I'm sorry. I...I think I should go."

"Edward..." I touched his shoulder and he glanced up at me, his eyes glistening.

"Sorry," he repeated miserably.

"No, I'm sorry." I slid my arm around him. "You're not ready for this, are you? Don't go, ok? You shouldn't drive anyway, after all that wine."

"I thought you would have wanted me to go."

Even now he had such little confidence in himself, I thought. I hated seeing him so sad, apologising all the time and thinking he was letting me down. It was clear enough that if he went home now, he would worry that he spoiled things and that I wouldn't want to see him again. I touched his face and made him look at me.

"I don't want you to go. I said before I won't do anything you don't want. I can wait, Edward, I just want to be with you. I love you," I said.

His eyes widened a touch and he blinked rapidly. "But..."

"You don't have to say anything," I added. "I just want you to know how I feel. I'm not going anywhere. You're what I want; being with you makes me happy." I touched my lips to his lightly. "Come on, it's getting late. Why don't you text Jasper and tell him you'll be back in the morning? Stay in my guest room."

"Are you sure?" he whispered.

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"Thank you."

Edward pulled his phone out and sent his brother a message and a few minutes later he disappeared into the guest room. I went to my own room, slowly undressed and got into bed. I felt so sad for Edward and I wished I could have spent the night with my arms around him. I just knew he would be lying there the other side of the wall, telling himself he let me down and worrying that I would think badly of him. Even though I said I loved him, I knew he still didn't think much of himself.

I slept fitfully, wondering what things would be like between us in the morning and considering whether I should keep my distance or not. When I finally hauled myself out of bed at seven-thirty, I could hear the kettle boiling and my heart began to pound. I quickly went into my bathroom to take a pee and clean my teeth, pulled on a pair of cut-offs and a t-shirt and headed for the kitchen.

Edward was sitting at the breakfast bar with his back to me, much to my surprise wearing the bathrobe I kept in the guest room for anyone who wanted to use it. A mug of coffee sat on the counter in front of him. He glanced over his shoulder and gave me a smile.

"Morning. I just boiled the kettle if you want coffee."

"Thanks, I'll get some in a minute. Did you sleep ok?"

"Not too bad."

He turned to face the other way again and I hesitated, wondering whether I should go over and kiss him or get my coffee and keep my hands off. I decided on the former; his problem was with how far things went, nothing else. I walked up behind him and rested my hand on his back, leaning around him to kiss his cheek. He angled his head slightly towards me and smiled again.

"Sorry about last night."

"You have nothing to be sorry for." I slid my arms around him and rested my chin on his shoulder. "I meant it when I said I love you."

"I know." He grasped one of my hands where it rested on his chest and slid it inside the neck of the robe, pressing it over his heart. I felt hot skin and his fast and erratic heartbeat. He leaned back slightly on the stool, resting his weight against me. My own heart lurched and I brushed my lips against his ear.

"Edward?"

"Mmm..."

He took his hand off mine and from the angle of his head I could see that his eyes were closed. Shit, did he want me to touch him now? I kissed his neck and gently grazed the skin below his ear with my teeth, stroking my hand over his chest and brushing across his nipple. I hesitated for a moment and then pinched it lightly between finger and thumb, feeling the small nub stiffen immediately. He drew his breath in sharply and shivered. My cock began to swell and work its way upright in my pants and I slowly grasped the loosely tied belt of the robe in my other hand and freed it, letting the fronts of the garment fall apart. Then I stroked both hands over his chest, feeling small but firm pecs. My lips moved from his neck to his jaw and he moaned softly, his back moving slightly against my chest as I let one hand slide lower over his abs to the waistband of his boxer briefs. I took my other hand off him and dropped it onto his leg a few inches above the knee, letting the tips of my fingers trail along the inside of his thigh. He shuddered and groaned and I stilled both hands. 'Don't fuck this up, Jacob.'

"Tell me what you want," I whispered.

"Mmm..."

I breathed in his ear and gently bit the lobe. "Edward, tell me..."

"Touch me," he said hoarsely.

His hand landed over mine where it rested on his stomach, pushing it lower suddenly until it bumped against his impossibly hard cock. He removed his hand again and I moved mine until it rested over his erection, feeling the heat of it as it twitched under the thin fabric of his shorts. He gasped softly and rolled his head back against my shoulder. My own cock throbbed impatiently and I ignored it, stroking my hand up and down Edward's length, feeling dampness around the head and discovering that he was indeed cut, just like I imagined. I bit my lip to stop myself groaning and moved my hand lower, cupping his balls and squeezing gently. He whimpered and squirmed against me and I used my other hand to free the button on his shorts, drawing his cock out of the opening and grasping it more firmly.

"Oh, God..." he gasped.

I kissed and nibbled his neck and began to slide my hand up and down his shaft, rubbing my thumb over the head and gradually increasing speed. Edward's hand landed on the edge of the kitchen counter and gripped it hard enough to turn his knuckles white while he cursed softly under his breath, his body shuddering against me as he came rapidly over my hand and his stomach. I took my hand off him and grabbed the dish towel from the stove nearby, wiping both him and my fingers with it and tossing it aside. He quickly tucked himself back into his shorts as I spun the stool around to face me.

"Uh...sorry..." he muttered and let out an embarrassed giggle, his face scarlet.

I wrapped my arms around him again and leaned closer to kiss his hot cheek. God, I was so hard I was in considerable discomfort and I longed to feel his hands on me. Touching him like that had driven me wild and I only found his innocence more of a turn on.

"Do you want to get a shower?" I murmured.

"Yes."

I backed off and he got to his feet, pulling the robe around himself. His green eyes sparkled and he grinned shyly.

"Can I share it?" I blurted before I could stop myself.

"Yes," he repeated quickly.

"We'll use mine, it's bigger."

I headed to my room, leaving him to follow me, unable to believe my luck. My heart was thumping wildly and my cock seemed to throb in time with it. I dropped my pants and t-shirt on the bedroom floor, hurried into the bathroom and turned on the shower. It was a larger square stall and I stepped under the hot spray quickly and leaned forward with both hands on the wall, facing away from the bathroom door as I waited for Edward to join me. I couldn't hear anything except the rush of the water cascading over my head, but after a moment he appeared, ducking under my arm so that he faced me, resting his hands on my sides. I leaned closer and brushed my lips against his, reaching up to angle the shower head slightly away so that it ran down my back.

Edward grabbed the bottle of lemon-scented shower gel from the wire rack and squeezed some into one hand. I traced a line of small kisses along his jaw to his ear, struggling to suppress a groan as he began washing my chest. I felt as if I would explode at any moment whether he touched me or not and I shuddered as his fingers brushed over my abs and then stopped a couple inches above where the tip of my cock was touching my stomach. He hesitated for a moment and I took one hand off the wall and touched his face.

"Don't do anything you don't want to," I said shakily, while my erection seemed to strain upwards, desperately trying to reach his hand.

"I just don't want to be a...disappointment."

"You won't be. Just do what you would do to yourself. You do touch yourself, right?" I said in his ear.

"Yes." He snorted suddenly and pressed his face into my neck, his hand grasping me at the same time. I sucked my breath in hard and looked down, watching as his fingers caressed me slowly and carefully. Watching was almost as exciting as feeling and I resisted the urge to thrust myself into his hand, leaving him to go at his own pace as much as it was killing me to stay still. As it was I doubted I would last even as long as he had. I was trembling with the effort of controlling myself and when he put his other hand on me, cupping my balls and squeezing lightly as he rubbed more firmly up and down my shaft, I felt myself losing it.

"God, Edward, that feels so good," I groaned.

I wasn't normally particularly vocal, but I wanted him to know how he was making me feel. He had little enough confidence, but he rapidly seemed to be gaining some as his hands quickened their pace and I felt his cock, hard again, bump against my hip. I came then, my eyes still downcast, watching my thick white fluid spurting through his fingers. He took his hands off me and rinsed them under the spray of the shower and I slid my arm around him, pulling him closer and covering his mouth hungrily with my own despite my breathlessness. I barely had chance to begin softening before his erection pressing against my stomach had me wanting more. I dragged my mouth away from his again, my chest heaving with the effort of trying to breathe hard through my nose.

"Edward...are you ok?" I panted.

He nodded and opened his eyes slowly, his pupils widely dilated. He dropped them away from mine again and leaned in to kiss my neck.

"I love you," he whispered, barely audible above the sound of rushing water.

My heart, which was already banging against my ribs, threatened to burst free and I hugged him tighter against me.

"I love you too," I replied.

After a few moments, reluctantly I pulled myself away from him and grabbed the shower gel. My hot water didn't last forever and the last thing I wanted was a cold blast shocking us out of the moment. I poured out a handful and passed the bottle to Edward, then began to lather him up, this time not hesitating to wrap my hand around his cock, making him gasp and shudder. In return, he seemed to enjoy washing me and the shower stall quickly filled with the scent of lemons. I turned the water off just as it began to lose its heat and stepped out onto the mat, grabbing a towel to pass to Edward before I began drying myself, my erection bobbing impatiently in front of me. I ignored it until Edward finished with his towel and then grasped his hand, tugging him into the bedroom.

"Come and lie down with me," I said.

He did so without protest and I slid my arms around him, pulling him close against me. His cock had softened a little, but as I stroked my hands over his back and kissed and nibbled at his neck, it rapidly stiffened again and nudged my own. I slid one hand between us, grasping him and rubbing him against me. The feel of his cock against mine, his nails digging into the back of my shoulder and the sound of his moans and whimpers thrilled me and I quickened the movement of my hand and gyrated my hips, increasing the friction between us. Both of us lasted a little longer this time, but not by much. When Edward began to come, his fluid coating my hand and the end of my cock, I erupted too and then reluctantly rolled away from him to grab a handful of tissues from the box on the bed table to clean us up as best I could. I tossed them aside then and slid my arms around him again, brushing my lips against his.

We lay together, cuddling and idly stroking each other's backs and shoulders, not talking, until my stomach decided to rumble impatiently and interrupt our closeness. Edward laughed and pulled away from me.

"I better get breakfast," I said reluctantly. "You want some?"

"Yes, please, I'm pretty hungry too."

He got up and slipped out of the room quickly. I stayed where I was for a moment, a grin splitting my face, somewhat amazed by the morning's events so far. Considering how uncomfortable Edward had been last night, he had suddenly taken a giant leap forward and I knew I wasn't going to be able to get enough of him. Even after two orgasms, my cock still hadn't softened fully and it wouldn't take much to have it standing to attention again. I rolled off the bed quickly and grabbed my pants, not bothering with the t-shirt this time as I went into the kitchen. Edward appeared a moment later, dressed now, but with his shirt half-unfastened and his hair as wild as ever. His cheeks were flushed and he looked smug and self-satisfied. I was crazy about him and I grabbed him again and gave him a kiss.

"What do you want for breakfast?"

"Anything, I guess. I usually have oatmeal."

"I got oatmeal." I let him go and set about making breakfast. "How long can you stay?" I asked him.

"I should probably go soon and face the music. I'm going to have to tell the others what I'm doing; Jasper couldn't really cover for me this time. He was just going to tell them last night I was with friends having a few drinks and didn't want to drive, but I can't go on lying about it."

"You think your parents will have a problem?"

"Only with the fact that I'm seeing someone when they probably think it's still too soon. They might take some convincing that you're the right thing for me, when I never showed any interest in guys before."

"Can you come back later?" I asked. "I forgot what day it is, I have to work this morning, but in the afternoon - I'm actually surprised Seth hasn't been calling me to find out where I am." It was way past the time I usually opened the garage.

Edward grinned. "We can go for that spin in the Skyline," he said.

Thirty minutes later, I reluctantly said goodbye to him at the door and watched as he drove slowly past the garage and up to the road. I saw Seth appear in the garage doorway a moment later and stare after the Skyline in surprise. I was clearly going to have some explaining to do too.


	11. Chapter 11

**As always, thank you for reviewing or saving an alert, or simply reading and enjoying the story. **

CHAPTER ELEVEN

**Edward's POV**

I didn't drive straight home, but stopped before I reached the turning into our drive to give myself a few extra minutes to get my thoughts in order. My heart was pounding wildly and felt likely to explode at any minute. Jacob loved me!

I hadn't expected to hear those words from him; it hadn't even crossed my mind that he might feel like that, despite the wonderful way he treated me. It was that which made the difference to me. I had been awake half the night thinking about things, imagining him lying the other side of the wall, probably frustrated because of my reluctance to progress the physical aspect. It wasn't that I didn't want him to touch me; I'd been fantasising about it enough recently. Part of it was my stupid shyness and embarrassment and the knowledge that if I managed to get it up at all I would last about five seconds, but I reminded myself that he knew how inexperienced I was and what I'd been through and that he wouldn't criticise me like..._her_. Besides that I worried that I wouldn't please him, but in the end I just decided I had to get over myself and give it a try. He _loved _me. I couldn't imagine him laughing or scoffing or anything else and when he had slid his arms around me in the kitchen, standing behind me so he couldn't see my face, it had been easy to just let things happen. The way he touched me had been amazing and by the time he came in the shower, in not very much more time than it took me, I lost my embarrassment and simply wanted to enjoy it, over and over again.

I struggled to wipe the smile off my face now as I began to drive again and headed up towards the house. Jasper would guess what I'd been doing in a second, I just knew it.

I was lucky in that Mom and Dad were both at the hospital when I walked into the house and Emmett was in the gym with a client. At least I didn't have to face all of them at once, although Jasper appeared in an instant, grabbed my arm and practically dragged me off my feet in his efforts to get me up the stairs and into my room so that he could grill me.

"So? How was it? You slept with him?"

"Jasper!" I groaned and predictably felt myself turning red. "I slept in the guest room."

"You know, I believe you, only because I know you so well. But don't try telling me you didn't do _anything_."

"Well...um..." I avoided looking at him. "I'm not saying. Why must you be so damned nosey?"

Jasper giggled. "Like that's not an admission of guilt! Sorry, I can't help it, I guess I'm still surprised you're seeing a guy. But it's cool. I like seeing you look so happy again."

"He said he loves me," I blurted smugly.

"That was fast." Jasper raised an eyebrow.

"Not really. We seem to have a...connection."

"Ed, just be careful, ok?" he said more seriously. "I'm sure Jacob's sincere, I mean, I never heard anything bad about him, but I don't want to see you back in that place you were a few weeks ago. Don't rush things. Don't do things with him just to please him if you're not ready for it."

"I'm not going to. What did you tell Mom and Dad and Emmett?"

"Just that you had some wine and were staying at a friend's house."

"I'm going to tell them the truth," I said decidedly. "I can't keep sneaking around pretending I'm hanging out with Mike and Tyler. I can't remember the last time I even saw them."

"Edward? You're back then." Emmett appeared suddenly, his training session apparently over.

"You can practise on him," Jasper winked at me.

"What are you talking about, Jas?" Emmett threw himself onto my bed, almost knocking Jasper and I onto the floor. "Have a good night, Edward?"

I turned around to face him. "Yes, I did."

"How's Mike? I haven't seen him for months."

"Nor have I," I smirked and then continued in a rush. "I wasn't in Forks, I was on the Reservation. I stayed at Jacob Black's house."

"What the hell?" Emmett exclaimed. "Why didn't you say you were with him? I didn't know you were that close to him."

"Well, you know he helped me out a few times. He...um...we..." I stammered. I didn't know how to put it and I was pretty sure Jasper never had this trouble. In fact I could clearly remembering him sitting down at the dinner table about seven years before and saying, 'I'm gay!' in a defiant tone. Now I looked at him in the hopes that he would help me out.

"Edward's dating Jacob," he said calmly.

"Wh-what?" Emmett's mouth hung open and he stared at me in disbelief. "Shit, you stayed the night with him!"

"I was in the guest room!" I exclaimed.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" he frowned. "Since when did you like guys?"

"I don't know, since I met Jacob. I never had much opportunity to like anybody except Bella, did I? I went on a date with him a few weeks ago, before I started getting fit and it was a huge disaster because I didn't see how he could possibly be interested in me. Then I talked to him about everything and he kept in touch with me while I was training."

"And now you're dating? Isn't it a bit soon for you to be seeing anyone?"

"It's been months, Emmett. Maybe I want to have a little fun. Maybe I want to forget about all the bad things that have happened to me and enjoy being with someone who doesn't want to hurt me." I said.

"I guess that's fair enough. But a guy? Are you sure?"

"Yes," I stated firmly.

Emmett shrugged. "Each to their own. Damn, if you're gay too I guess it's down to me to carry on the family name then." He grinned a little. "Are you going to tell Mom and Dad?"

I nodded. "Do you think they'll be mad?"

"No, I think they'll say the same thing as me - that they're worried you're rushing into something. For what it's worth, Jacob Black's a pretty decent guy, but he better not put one foot wrong with you, or he'll wish he'd kept his distance."

"Hell, Emmett, don't be such a caveman," Jasper grimaced. "You never said that about any of the guys I've dated."

"Because you can take care of yourself and it's usually you that does the heart-breaking," smirked Emmett. "It's lucky Mom and Dad don't know the reputation you have, Jas, they'd probably lock you in your room until you're thirty."

The three of us joked around for a while and went outside to look at the Skyline. Emmett knew I had been planning to buy it and he walked around it with his tongue practically hanging out of his mouth the same way Jacob had done, but he seemed somewhat sceptical as he asked if Jacob had influenced me into parting with so much cash.

"We looked at it together, we went to PA for a day," I said. "He had no idea I was going to buy it. I never really got the opportunity to do anything for myself, Emmett, and it's time I did."

Emmett grinned. "I never thought I'd hear you talk like that. Just don't take a leaf out of Jasper's book, I'm sure half his trust fund is gone already."

"Fuck off," Jasper muttered. "I want to enjoy it while I can - the world could end tomorrow and I can't spend it when I'm dead, can I?"

"You idiot."

Emmett left us and went to greet another client who had just arrived and Jasper headed back into the house. He had a date with Danny and wanted to get ready, so I was left to my own devices until Mom returned from the hospital. She had only had two appointments, although Dad would be there all day. I decided to talk to her immediately rather than think about it and work myself up into a state of worry. I began by saying that I wanted to talk to her about something and that I'd be grateful if she would listen until I finished before saying anything. She sat there in silence, occasionally frowning, blinking and gasping, but otherwise did as I had asked. Then she said the kind of things I expected - the same things Emmett had said - only she wasn't quite so ready to accept it and was convinced I wanted to see Jacob for all the wrong reasons. He was a guy so he wouldn't behave like Bella; he had helped me and been a good friend to me so I felt obliged to give him something in return, or alternatively I thought I could trust him and he made me feel more confident than I had in a long time so I was transferring those feelings to desire for him. She told me even if it was right for me, I was rushing things by staying over at his house and that she didn't think I was really gay.

"You know, sometimes, Mom, I wish you weren't a shrink," I sighed eventually. "Anybody else's Mom would either say they love me anyway and support me, or they hate the idea of me being gay and won't accept it. I don't want to hear all the reasons why I might be doing it and how my behaviour could affect this or that. I want to be with Jacob - I like him, he likes me, he makes me feel great - that's all there is to it. Maybe it won't work out, but it's been months now and I'm sick of being lonely and thinking nobody could be interested in me. I'm not the same person I was when I moved back here, Mom. I know I still have a way to go, but this is what I want and I'm perfectly capable of deciding that for myself."

Her eyes widened and then much to my surprise, she smiled. "I've never heard you sound assertive like that," she said. "I still have plenty of reservations, but you're right, I do find it difficult to switch off my job and just be a mother. Jacob does seem to be good for you; after you talked to him about things you found direction again. It might be nice if you bring him over to the house some time so we can get to know him a little."

"Seriously?"

"Yes, of course."

"What about Dad?"

"He'll be fine, I'll talk to him when he gets home. There is one other thing that concerns me, though, Edward. You didn't come home last night and..."

"I didn't do anything, I had some wine and stayed in the guest room," I interrupted, feeling my face burning again as I thought about what we had done just a few hours before in the kitchen...and the shower...and Jacob's bed. "Don't worry about...that...I'll be fine."

I was relieved when she didn't ask anything more and I changed the subject and told her about the car, pointing out I would probably sell the Volvo if Dad didn't have a use for it. She was a little perturbed that I spent such a large chunk of money without apparently putting much thought into it, but at the same time accepted that I never bought anything and I wanted to stop spending every minute with my computers and have a little fun like anyone else my age.

All in all things went pretty well and I returned to my room until it was time for lunch, then showered and changed ready to go and meet Jacob. I set off again at one-thirty, my stomach full of butterflies as I drove up to his house. I knocked on the door, my heart pounding, biting my lip as I waited for him to answer.

_"Come in, Edward!"_ he bellowed a moment later and I tentatively opened the door. "I'm in the shower!" he called out.

I could hear the sound of water from beyond his open bedroom door and I went into the kitchen to wait, immediately imagining him naked, soaping himself and then me with him, touching each other the way we had that morning. Blood began rushing to my cock and also my face when he appeared with a towel around his waist, his upper body still wet and his hair dripping.

"Sorry, I'm running late, I won't be long," he said, stepping closer to me. He wiped wet hands on the towel and then placed them on my waist and leaned in to kiss me. Our lips clung and he slid an arm around me, pulling me closer before he caught himself and backed off quickly. "Damn, I'll get you all wet," he grinned.

I was already getting wet, I thought, feeling a damp patch forming in my shorts. The instant rush of desire surprised me and after what had happened in this very room just hours before, I wondered how I would ever get enough.

"I don't mind," I heard myself whisper. My face heated up further and I lowered my eyes to his chest to avoid his gaze. I watched as a droplet of water ran slowly from his throat down his body, gathering smaller droplets on the way and speeding up until it reached the towel and soaked into the fabric. My eyes lowered still further and landed on the unmistakeable shape of his erection pushing against the tightly bound towel.

"Jesus, Edward," he murmured, reaching out to me again. "You have no idea what you're doing to me, do you?"

I raised my eyes to meet his and then let them slide shut as he moved closer and his lips took mine in another heated kiss.

**Jacob's POV**

I didn't mean to just pounce on him the minute he got in the door, not wanting him to think getting my hands on him was all I was interested in, but the way he looked at me, his eyes burning a trail down my body to my cock, while at the same time that cute shy blush coloured his cheeks almost undid me entirely. There was no way I could spend a comfortable afternoon with him in my current state of arousal and when I lowered my eyes for a second I could see he was just as turned on, the hard bulge in his dark jeans obvious. Instantly my mind was flooded with the way he had felt in my hand that morning, the way we had played in the shower and then on my bed. I was desperate to get my hands on him again and as I plunged my tongue into his mouth, he melted against me and slid his arms around my neck, the dampness on my body immediately soaking into his clothes. He was wearing an open shirt over a t-shirt and I pushed the outer garment off his shoulders, pulling his arms from my neck for a moment so I could remove it completely before I hugged him tight against me, my cock straining behind the tightly fastened towel. I ran one hand down his back and slid it under the bottom of his t-shirt, stroking the warm skin underneath and rolling my hips, rubbing myself against him. He whimpered into my mouth and I could feel his heart skipping unevenly in his chest. I broke the kiss and pulled my head back a little.

"Let's go to my room," I said breathlessly.

"Ok."

My bed was still rumpled from the morning and I straightened out the comforter quickly. Edward toed off his shoes and then hesitated.

"Take your shirt off," I said softly. My cock was twitching impatiently behind the towel and I struggled to keep my hands off of it as I watched Edward grasp the hem of the t-shirt and pull it up and off his body, slowly revealing his abs and chest, the developing muscles flexing as he stretched his arms up and freed his head from the shirt before dropping it on the floor. His face was red and he kept his eyes down, but he was grinning and I couldn't take my eyes off him. I moved closer to him and placed one hand on his chest, feeling the light sprinkling of hair before stroking down to his stomach and then wrapping my arms around him again.

"You're so beautiful," I murmured. "Lie down with me."

We fell onto the bed, still in each other's arms and I loosened the towel, throwing it aside with relief. My cock bumped against Edward's belt buckle and to my intense surprise he slid his hand between us and grasped it before I could do anything. I sucked my breath in hard as he squeezed lightly and he let out a soft snort of laughter and ran his thumb over my head, teasing the slit. I groaned and lowered my eyes so that I could watch him touching me, a little more assertively than before, his hand beginning to slide up and down smoothly, occasionally pausing to cup my balls and tug on them gently, then continuing to firmly stroke my cock. As my orgasm began to build rapidly I moved my hips, thrusting myself against his palm and moaning with pleasure when he responded by gripping tighter and moving his hand faster. Once again, it was over far too quickly and I reached out to retrieve the towel to wipe up the mess, panting for breath.

"Jesus, Edward," I groaned. "I didn't expect that."

"Um...well...part of you seemed like it did," he smirked.

I threw the towel aside again and reached for his belt buckle, quickly freeing it and lowering his zipper. My knuckles brushed his cock as it strained against his shorts and he whimpered and rolled onto his back. I sat up and began to pull down both his jeans and shorts at the same time, removing them along with his socks and tossing the lot onto the floor. Then I lowered myself back down beside him and rested my hand on his chest, lightly stroking as I bent to kiss him. His lips parted under mine and I thrust my tongue in, exploring and tasting, feeling his heart pounding erratically under my hand until I broke the kiss in order to breathe. Edward's eyes were closed and I leaned over him, touching my lips to his throat and then moving downwards to his chest until I reached the hard nub of a nipple. I rolled my tongue around it and then bit gently. Edward moaned and clutched at me and I glanced down at his cock, noticing a glistening trail of pre-cum leading from his slit to his stomach, the organ curved and twitching, making me long to taste it. I wasn't sure if it was too soon, however, and I wrapped my hand around it instead, stroking firmly as I continued to lick and nibble his chest. He groaned and shivered and after a few moments began to thrust himself into my hand, encouraging me to speed up. I watched from the corner of my eye as he came, spurting all over himself, and then once again grabbed the towel to clean us up.

"Oh, God," Edward groaned, opening his eyes to meet mine. "You make me feel so good."

"I love you," I said. "I love making you feel good." I gave him a light kiss.

"I love you too," he sighed.

"You know, we better get dressed and get out of here, or I'd be tempted to just keep you in bed all day," I teased and sat up. "I don't want you thinking I'm only interested in one thing."

Edward grinned and rolled over, reaching down to grab his clothes from the floor. I found something to wear too and in a few minutes we were heading out to take a drive in the Skyline, which had been the whole point before we became distracted by each other.

"Did you talk to your family?" I asked him as he began to drive slowly off the Reservation.

"Yes, Emmett and Mom anyway, Dad's at the hospital. They were ok, Mom just worried I'm not ready to see anyone and doing it for all the wrong reasons, but she listened to me at least. She wants you to come over some time." He smiled sheepishly. "Sorry; you don't have to."

"No, it's fine." I reached over and gave his arm a squeeze. "I'll come over any time you want. Maybe if your parents get to know me a little, they won't worry so much. Or maybe it'll have the opposite effect and they'll lock you up and not let you see me."

"God, I hope not!" blurted Edward. "So what did Seth say earlier?"

"Most of it was unrepeatable," I laughed. Seth had said I must be keen on Edward if I let him stay over already and that I looked tired so presumably I spent the whole night getting it on and Edward must be having difficulty sitting down comfortably. I set him straight of course, but I knew he hadn't believed me.

"Well, Jasper made up his own mind about what I was doing all night too," Edward grinned. "He judges everyone by his own standards. He has a different boyfriend every couple of months."

We continued to chat easily as we bypassed Forks and once out on the highway, I discovered that Edward did indeed like to drive fast and he had a good feel for the car. He told me Emmett taught him some driving skills before he met Bella, but it had been a long time since he had been able to put them to good use. The Volvo wasn't bad for a few things, but horsepower wasn't something it had a huge amount of compared to the Skyline.

In no time we were approaching PA and Edward asked if I would prefer to go straight back or stop for a while. We parked up close to the harbour and walked for a while, holding hands and talking about our respective growing up experiences. I told him about Dad and my sisters and the Res school and he told me about Jasper's antics and his own reluctance to actually do anything fun, which he was keen to rectify now that he didn't have over-protective parents or Bella holding him back.

When we returned to the car, Edward dug the keys out of his pocket and passed them to me. "I thought you might like to try it out," he said.

"Are you kidding? I've always wanted to drive one of these!" I beamed.

I loved driving Edward's car and we made good time on the journey back, parking up beside the house just before five. I had considered stopping in Forks for dinner, but it was still a little early so we decided to raid my freezer and make something up together instead. We made chicken and ham pasta with a salad and Edward drank juice instead of beer, reminding me that he had to train the following morning.

After dinner, we switched on the television to watch a movie and I stretched out on the sofa, my back to the cushions and Edward lay down in front of me, his back against my chest. I slid my arm around his waist and cuddled him, nibbling and kissing his neck and breathing in the scent of him until I was hard and struggling not to grind myself against his butt. I pulled his t-shirt up a few inches and stroked my hand over his abs and he shivered and gasped softly. I wanted him so badly. I imagined us lying here naked when he was ready to take things further, me pushing my cock gently into him, my arm around him, stroking him as I made love to him. He would be incredibly tight and I would probably disgrace myself by losing it in less than a minute. I groaned and pressed my face into his neck, sliding my hand lower and feeling that he was just as turned on as I was.

"Mmm, yes," he breathed. I gave him a light squeeze and took my hand off.

"Edward, take your clothes off, baby," I whispered.

He sat up without a word and began to undress, his back still turned to me. I quickly unfastened my pants and wriggled out of them without getting up. My shirt followed and then Edward lay down again, facing me this time, his cock nudging against mine. His eyes were lowered and I kissed him, stroking my hand down his side to his hip, then around to his butt.

"Can I try something?" I asked softly.

"Mmm," he hummed against my lips.

"I want to taste you."

His eyes flew open, startled green partially obscured by huge black pupils. He licked his lips and then closed his eyes again.

"Ok."

"Are you sure you're ok with that?"

"Yes."

I pulled myself upright and turned Edward onto his back, crouching over him with my knees either side of his. He kept his eyes closed as I bent to kiss his neck and then his chest, licking and nibbling at his flesh, gently biting his nipples the way I had earlier. He loved that and he writhed beneath me now, his cock quivering against his stomach and his hips lifting slightly, silently begging me to move lower. I worked my way slowly down over his stomach until the tip of his cock nudged my chin, making him gasp, then paused and looked up at his face. His skin was flushed with arousal, lips parted, eyes closed, his hands clutching at the sofa cushions. As I watched his teeth sank into his lower lip and he squirmed desperately, moaning softly. He was beautiful.

I bent again and brushed my lips lightly against his head, slipping my tongue out just enough to capture the bead of pre-cum which was oozing from him. I loved the way he tasted - salty, sweet and sour all at once - and I parted my lips, drawing his tip between them and sucking gently.

"Oh, God," Edward moaned.

I let him slip from my mouth and ran my tongue down the length of his shaft to his balls, cupping them gently and rolling them between my fingers, licking back up again and capturing him more firmly in my mouth, wrapping my free hand around his shaft. He shuddered and gasped and reached out to touch me.

"Jacob...oh, shit...I won't...last very long," he panted.

I took my hand off his balls and grasped his hand instead, holding it tight and releasing his cock for a second.

"It's alright, just relax and go with it." I guided him back into my mouth and dipped lower, taking him deeper into my throat and then began to bob up and down, sucking and licking, following the movement with my hand. His nails dug into my other hand as he clutched it tightly and he moaned and gasped, his body trembling beneath me.

"Oh, God...Jacob, stop...I'm gonna...uh..." he groaned suddenly. I squeezed his hand tighter and swallowed around him as he came, sucking the last drops from him before I let him slip from my mouth again. I shifted my position slightly, pushing one knee in between his before I lowered myself onto him and kissed his hot cheek.

"How was that?"

"Um...I...uh...indescribable," he stammered. "I've never...had anyone do that."

"I know you haven't." I kissed his ear and moved myself uncomfortably, my erection pushing against his thigh. "I love the way you taste."

He opened his eyes slowly and smiled. "Do you want me to...do that for you?"

He looked uncertain and I shook my head. "Not if you're not comfortable with it. Just touch me. I love having your hands on me."

He pushed against me, making me roll onto my side next to him and began stroking his hand over my body, kissing and nibbling at my neck and chest, teasing me by carefully avoiding touching my cock until I was groaning and begging, then grasping it firmly, grinning as he brought me to another rapid orgasm. His confidence was soaring and I was amazed when he sat up and grabbed my shorts to clean me up, joking that he should probably have sucked me after all to save me making so much mess.

Afterwards we snuggled up together for a while, kissing and cuddling until reluctantly Edward pulled himself away from me and began to put his clothes on.

"I should get home," he said.

"Can't you stay?"

"I want to, I just think I shouldn't do that too often yet. Now my parents know I'm seeing you, if I stay over it won't matter what I say, they'll think we're...you know..."

"Yeah, I know. It's ok." I hauled myself up and put my pants on. "Can I see you tomorrow then?"

"Yes, definitely," he said at once.

"Just come over when you're ready," I told him as I followed him to the door. He turned back to give me one last kiss before he opened it and I wrapped my arms around him, crushing him in a hug. "I love you, Edward."

"I love you too," he whispered.

I watched as he got in the car and drove away, staying in the doorway until the Skyline's tail lights had completely vanished before I went back inside to watch the TV for a while before bed.


	12. Chapter 12

**As always, thank you for all the great reviews. I'm looking forward to seeing what you all think of this chapter - don't be shy :o)**

CHAPTER TWELVE

**Edward's POV**

I didn't get the opportunity to talk to Dad until the next day as he had come home from the hospital exhausted before I got back, and had gone straight to bed. I saw Mom, however, and she said Dad was a little concerned about me suddenly wanting to be with a man, the same way she had been, but that he accepted it was time I made an effort to move on and I had to do what felt right to me. When I saw him in the morning at breakfast, he said more or less exactly the same thing to me.

"I just hope you're not rushing into anything," he said. "I mean with the physical aspect. I talked to all you boys when you were younger, but back then I guess I assumed you'd all be worrying about pregnancy and girls' fathers coming after you." He gave me a wry smile.

"I hardly think you talked to Jasper about pregnancy; he came out when he was fourteen," I reminded him.

"Oh, yes I did, about a year before. I was sure at the time he said he was gay just to thumb his nose at me."

"I thought he was just trying to draw attention to himself," I said. "Look, please don't give me 'the talk' now; I'm not doing anything, but if I do, I'm not completely clueless about it."

I was of course, but I figured Jacob would guide me, or I would ask Jasper if I could make him be serious about it. I wasn't going to tell Dad that though; he would probably worry what Jasper might tell me. Oddly enough, I didn't feel particularly uncomfortable about talking to Dad as soon as I knew he wasn't going to criticise me.

"Fair enough, but you know you can ask me things if you want to. I can switch off 'Dad' and just be a doctor when required." He cleared his throat and changed the subject. "So, your mother said she suggested you bring Jacob over to get to know us. Why don't you invite him for lunch next Sunday? Rosalie will be here, of course. I've asked Jasper to bring this Danny character, but I'm not so sure about that."

"Danny may well not last until next Sunday," I smirked.

I went to the gym for my workout and later ate lunch with the others, during which Jacob cropped up in the conversation once or twice. My face burned when first Mom and then Emmett mentioned him and then predictably Jasper teased me for blushing. I supposed I would eventually get used to it, but in the meantime the ease at which I became embarrassed about the slightest thing annoyed me.

I left right after lunch and went to spend the rest of the day with Jacob, remembering to invite him for lunch the following week.

"Is this the official 'meet the parents' invite?" he grinned. "It's ok, I'm cool with it."

I told him about the reactions of my family to the news and then with the more serious stuff out of the way, we set off for a walk down to the beach, Jacob grabbing my hand the minute we were out of the door and holding it tight.

"Aren't you worried about people seeing us?" I asked nervously.

"Nope. Everybody that matters knows now."

I relaxed and laced my fingers with his as we walked and once we set foot on the damp sand, he pulled his hand free and wrapped his arm around my neck instead, leaning in to press his lips to my cheek. The beach was deserted and I returned the kiss.

"I missed you last night," he whispered. "I hate being apart from you."

"Me too," I sighed.

"You think you can stay over with me next weekend?"

"I'd like to. Maybe after the lunch though, or I'll end up sitting there through the whole meal with a red face and Jasper will take the piss."

"You have a red face now."

"Oh, God," I groaned, putting my hands to my cheeks.

"You're cute when you blush."

Jacob pulled me to a halt and put his hands on my waist, pushing me backwards a few steps until I was leaning against the bottom of the cliff. His lips took mine in a searing kiss and I slid my arms around his neck and returned it eagerly, feeling myself immediately beginning to harden. Jacob pressed himself against me and his own arousal was obvious as it nudged mine. He broke the kiss with a groan and brushed his lips against my ear.

"I don't know why I suggested going for a walk," he murmured. "I want you so damned much."

"Me too," I sighed, relieved that for once I had put on loose fitting jeans.

Jacob pushed one knee between mine and I shuffled my feet apart, biting my lip to stay quiet as he ground himself against me. My cock throbbed impatiently, longing to be touched and I shuddered and removed my arms from his neck again.

"Maybe we should go back to the house," I said.

"You're not comfortable fooling about here?"

"I just think it'd be better if we could take our clothes off."

Jacob grinned and stepped back. "What have you done with my sweet shy Edward who wouldn't have dared to say something like that a week ago?"

"You must have just given him a bit more confidence."

It was true; he had given me a whole heap of confidence and as we walked off the beach and made our way back towards the house, my heart began to pound with excitement at the thought of falling onto Jacob's bed in his arms, naked, touching each other. When I had gone to bed the previous night I hadn't been able to stop thinking about the way he wrapped his lips around me, teasing me with hands and tongue and I had got myself off twice thinking about it. I wanted him to do that again and I wanted to return the favour, scared as I was that I might not be any good at it, that I might not like the taste or I might gag and embarrass myself. I almost wished I'd asked Jasper for some advice, but that would have been even more mortifying than actually trying to do it and hoping for the best.

By the time we reached the house my cock was achingly hard and I was both nervous and excited. I didn't hesitate to follow Jacob into his room, kicking off my shoes and hanging my jacket on a hook in the hallway on the way. We undressed quickly and lay down together, our lips meeting immediately and our cocks bumping together. Jacob slid his hand down my thigh, then hooked it under my knee and pulled my leg up, draping it over his hip and pushing his leg in between mine. His hand squeezed my butt and held me tight against him and I squirmed there, my hips beginning to gyrate of their own accord in my desperation to get some friction and I heard myself moan as his thigh worked its way up higher between mine. I remembered how it had felt with his hot mouth on me, sucking until I came and I stopped moving quickly, realising I was alarmingly close to losing it. I knew that if Jacob put his hand on me or God help me, his tongue, I would disgrace myself in seconds. I pulled away from him and sat up.

"Edward?" His eyes opened quickly. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I want to try something. I want to do what you did for me."

"Don't feel like you have to," he said immediately.

"I want to." My mouth had gone dry and I licked my lips. Jacob's brown eyes were fixed on me, dark with lust and I looked away quickly. I didn't want him to watch and see how awkward I was. "Close your eyes."

He did so and I moved down the bed and curled up beside him. His cock was straining against his belly, quivering in anticipation, and I grasped it in one hand, stroking it lightly while I explored his chest with my lips the way he had done mine. Unlike mine, his was completely smooth and hairless, but hard and bulging with muscle. I experimentally licked one of his nipples and then tugged it gently between my teeth, pleased by the sound of his sudden groan.

After a moment I turned my attention to the other nipple and then worked my way slowly south, skimming my lips and tongue over his abs and following the tantalising trail of dark hair from his navel to his cock. He groaned and shuddered, raising his hips to thrust himself harder into my hand. Grinning, I let go of his shaft and pushed him back down. He whimpered in protest until I grasped him again and touched the tip of my tongue to his head. It was glistening with pre-cum and I noticed it tasted sweet and sour at the same time. I swirled my tongue around the head again and then trailed it slowly down towards the base, trying to remember what he had done to me and copy it. I worked my way back up to the tip again and slowly guided it into my mouth, trying to keep my teeth out of the way. I lowered my head slowly until he bumped the back of my throat and almost made me gag and I released him again quickly and resumed licking.

"Don't try and take more than an inch or two in your mouth," Jacob panted.

"Mmm," I murmured. My face grew warm, but a brief glance upwards showed me his eyes were still closed and I relaxed and drew him into my mouth again. I licked and sucked slowly, using my hands on the rest of his length and his balls, encouraged by the moan of pleasure he gave.

"God, Edward, that's so good," he gasped. "Your mouth is so hot."

I carried on, quickly feeling the tightening in his balls as his orgasm approached. I wasn't sure if I wanted him to come in my mouth or not, but a moment later I was saved from worrying about it.

"Fuck...so close..." he groaned, reaching down and touching the side of my face. "Stop, baby, don't try swallowing until...you're more used to it."

I released him from my mouth and worked my hand faster and harder, my eyes fixed on his slit as his thick white fluid began to spurt from it onto his belly. A little touched my fingers and when he was done and I took my hands off, I licked my finger curiously, finding that I quite liked the taste of him.

"Jeez, Edward, you're so fucking sexy," he panted and I realised his eyes were open now, watching me lick his essence from my fingers. He sat up slowly and cupped my face in his hands, his palms cool on my hot skin. "That was amazing," he whispered.

"You're just saying that."

"I'm not. I love you and having you do that was incredible. Gonna let me return the favour?"

"Uh...yes..." I realised that my erection had subsided, probably because I'd been so busy concentrating on trying to make him enjoy himself, but when he took my penis in his hand and simply held it, it twitched back to life again in seconds. I moved back up the bed and lay down and after a few moments teasing me, finally he took my cock in his mouth and began sucking firmly. I kept my eyes closed the way he had done at first, simply feeling, but then I couldn't resist peeking through my lashes for a moment.

The sight of Jacob's plump moist lips wrapped around my cock, his head bobbing up and down and following the movement of his hand below it almost made me come right away and I closed my eyes again and breathed deeply, curling my hands into fists and clutching the bed covers beneath me. Jacob took his hand off me then, shifting his position a little and pushing my thighs apart. I felt vulnerable and exposed like that, but incredibly aroused at the same time and I pulled my knees up either side of him, taking advantage of the position by raising my hips and thrusting myself eagerly into his mouth. He quickly placed a hand on my belly and restrained me and I squirmed and moaned, my orgasm tantalisingly close, but still a little out of reach.

"Jacob..." I groaned. "Please..." I opened my eyes again just in time to see him grab a small bottle from the bed table that I hadn't noticed before. I watched curiously as he pumped a small amount of fluid from it into his hand and realised it must be lube. It smelled of lemons just like the shower gel and I wondered with a touch of amusement if it were possible to buy matching shower gel and lube sets.

Jacob glanced up at me and met my eyes, then quickly took his mouth off of me.

"It's ok, just relax. I won't hurt you, I promise."

"No...I know..." I closed my eyes again and immediately his mouth was wrapped around me and a cool slippery wet finger was stroking between my legs, exploring the ridge behind my balls and applying gentle pressure. It felt strangely arousing and I struggled to keep still, wanting to thrust myself both up into his mouth and down against his hand. His finger continued stroking, working its way further back to my ass, circling my tight hole and making me shudder. It felt good and wrong at the same time and I wanted more.

He released me from his mouth again and slowed the pace with his hand, paying more attention with the finger he was using to tease my hole. He took his hand away for a moment and squeezed out more lube, then resumed touching me, making me wet and slick.

"Edward, relax," he murmured again.

My muscles were clenched tight I realised and I tried to breathe slowly, willing myself to loosen up. I knew he meant to push his finger into me, but my body didn't want to co-operate.

"Sorry," I whispered.

"Take your time; you know, we don't have to do this now."

"I want to." I let my bent knees fall slowly outwards and down, relaxing all of the muscles in my lower body at the same time. The tip of Jacob's finger moved back and forth over my hole, gradually pressing against it with each pass until suddenly I felt it slide into me. It was only the tip and he stopped, lowering his head to draw my cock back into his mouth. He dipped his head low, taking my full length until my head was at the back of his throat. His hand gently cupped my balls and squeezed and at the same time his finger worked its way deeper. It felt tight, a little uncomfortable, but not really painful. I was slippery with lube and driven crazy by the feel of his mouth on me and any discomfort was barely noticeable. Jacob began to move his finger in and out of me slowly, pressing the tip upwards at the deepest point until suddenly it hit something so sensitive that I almost came there and then. I guessed it must be my prostate - Jasper had mentioned it feeling good once and I had told him to shut up and stop being disgusting.

"Ohhhh...shit..." I whined as Jacob's finger hit it again. He chuckled softly, his throat vibrating around the head of my cock and I was gone. I came forcefully, shouting out his name and swearing as he sucked me dry and then slowly released my cock and withdrew his finger. My legs slid down bonelessly, leaving me spread-eagled in the middle of the bed with Jacob still kneeling between my thighs. I forced my heavy eyelids up and watched as he crawled slowly up over me, his knees still resting between mine, lowering himself so that his arms rested either side of my head and his cock, half hard again, lay against my softening one.

"That was so good," I breathed, lifting my arms to wrap them around him.

"I love making you feel good," he whispered in my ear.

We lay together for a while, cuddling and kissing softly until both of us were ready for more. This time we simply lay together, stroking each other and looking into each other's eyes until we came onto hands and stomachs and then reluctantly dragged ourselves off of the bed and into the shower. I stayed with him until ten and then set off for home, our goodbye on the doorstep lasting another fifteen minutes. It was becoming harder and harder to tear myself away from him and after what had happened that day, I knew it wouldn't be long before I let him make love to me. I was scared, but I trusted him and I knew he would take care of me.

I had a busy week then, working on a big website I was building and I didn't get to see Jacob until Friday. We talked on the phone every night and by Wednesday he coaxed me into playing with myself while he talked to me. I was too self-conscious to talk dirty down the phone, but listening to him describe how he longed to touch and taste me, how hard he was and how he was rubbing himself imagining it was my hand on him, turned me on and I jerked off, letting him hear me pant and gasp as I came.

Friday he took me into Forks to a restaurant where we lingered over the meal and some wine, then strolled slowly back to Jacob's car. He held my hand and no one seemed to notice until I happened to glance across the street and spotted one shocked face, mouth open, staring at us. My mouth went dry and Jacob grunted as my nails dug into his hand. His eyes followed mine to where Bella stood on the other side of the street with a friend, staring at us as if we'd come from another planet.

"It's ok, Edward, just ignore her," Jacob said softly, his firm hand gripping mine as he led me to the end of the block and then around the corner to the parking lot.

I hated feeling so unnerved. It had been months and I guess I hadn't expected to ever see her again, which was ridiculous since she still lived in Forks. I hadn't forgotten the things she had done to me or the way she made me feel, but it had become a distant memory until now. Suddenly my newly built self-confidence began to slip just a little and I held onto Jacob gratefully. How could she still have such an affect on me?

"Are you alright, baby?" Jacob opened the car door for me, but pulled me into his arms for a moment before I got in.

"Yeah. It's stupid, really, I shouldn't let her bother me now. I guess it reminded me of how I felt...you know when I talked to you about everything."

"It's not stupid," Jacob said. "She's an evil bitch and she spent months tormenting you. I'm not surprised you're still a bit affected by it. But you're stronger now and you have me. She can't hurt you any more."

"I know. Thank you."

By the time the next day came, I had virtually put it out of my mind. I was intending to spend the entire afternoon and evening with Jacob and that was all I could think about. It was a cool, wet day and we stayed in, watching movies, cuddling, cooking dinner together and pleasuring each other over and over with hands and mouths. I couldn't get enough of him and I dragged myself away at midnight with great reluctance. However, I planned to spend Sunday night with him after he had been over to meet my family and I couldn't wait to be falling asleep in his arms.

Sunday lunch went pretty well. Jacob came over an hour before and hung out with Jasper and me in the gym where Emmett was busy setting up some new piece of equipment he had bought. Dad was late up, having worked a night shift at the hospital, and Rosalie was helping Mom prepare the meal. Jasper managed not to embarrass me once and Emmett invited Jacob to come over and use the gym any time he wanted a workout. They talked about Sam Uley a little as it was some time since Emmett had seen him. His wife Emily was in the last month of her pregnancy and had been having a tough time so she had needed him around.

Mom and Dad both talked to Jacob over lunch and I quickly stopped worrying that they might have some problem with me seeing him when they both seemed happy with his presence. Needless to say Danny didn't attend and Jasper said later he hadn't asked him. He and Danny were more 'fuck buddies' than anything else and didn't really have much in common. I noticed he looked somewhat wistful when he said this and I got the feeling he wanted more out of it than Danny did.

I didn't tell Mom and Dad I wouldn't be home that night and didn't take anything with me except for my toothbrush, but Jasper knew and intended to tell the others later on. As I got ready to leave he made me blush furiously by shoving a couple of condoms into my hand and whispering I better have them in case Jacob had forgotten to stock up.

"Jasper!" I hissed, shoving him into the kitchen, thankful that Jacob was talking to Emmett and hadn't noticed. "We're not going to be doing that!"

"Just in case," Jasper winked. "You never know when you might get carried away."

"Speak for yourself."

"Keep them anyway, you're bound to want them at some point," he grinned. "He looks at you like he wants to eat you."

Immediately I pictured Jacob kneeling between my legs, his lips wrapped around my cock and my face flamed. Jasper snorted with laughter and pushed me towards the door. "Go on, get out of here. And you might want to hide those in your pocket before Mom sees them."

"Shit," I muttered, stuffing the condoms into my jacket pocket with my toothbrush. To my relief he stayed in the kitchen and a minute later Jacob and I were in his car and on the way to the Reservation. I heaved a huge sigh of relief and Jacob glanced at me with a smile.

"You didn't really think they'd hate me and protest about you seeing me, did you?" he teased.

"No, Jasper just winds me up, that's all." I pulled myself together. I had the rest of the day and the whole night to enjoy with him and my family were going to be the last thing on my mind.

For once we didn't pounce on each other the minute we were in the house. We chilled out, watched some television and then Seth came over for a couple hours, keen to tell Jacob he had met someone new. The guy was a customer who had brought his car in with an electrical fault when Jacob wasn't around and they had talked and exchanged phone numbers. He lived in Forks and ran a bar with his brother. His name was Alec and he was three years older than Seth.

"He drives a blue Trans Am," he added.

"Tall guy, brown hair, brown eyes?" Jacob said.

Seth nodded. "You know him?"

"Vaguely. His car's been in a few times lately. It looks hot, but it's a heap of shit, always got some problem."

Seth grinned. "There's not much wrong with the car. You must have noticed he always gets me to work on it. He admitted he'd been making up problems for an excuse to come over until he could work up the courage to ask me out."

Seth hung around a little longer singing Alec's praises and then took off, saying the guy planned to call him at six o'clock and he didn't want to miss the call. Jacob and I ate only a light snack that evening and by nine we were in his room. We did all the things we usually did and for the first time I let him come in my mouth. I loved using my mouth on him, hearing his desperate gasps and moans as he got closer to orgasm, knowing it was me making him feel that good.

It was past midnight when we eventually showered and lay down to sleep. Jacob turned me away from him and then spooned up against me, his arms wrapped around me and his body moulded to mine, face in my neck. I could feel his heart beating against my back, his warm breath on my ear and his strong arms holding me and I struggled to stay awake as long as possible, just so I could relish the feeling for a few more minutes.

We over-slept and we were both disappointed that in the morning there was only time to take a shower together, relieving each other's morning woods with a quick soapy massage before we grabbed breakfast and left the house. Both of us had busy days planned and Jacob drove me home in his truck, gave me a quick kiss and breathed 'I love you' in my ear before he took off again and left me there to face the music.

Mom and Dad had both already left for the hospital, but Jasper couldn't wait to ask if I'd made use of the condoms and Emmett just frowned and said I should have at least had the guts to speak to Dad before I left, rather than leave it to Jasper to tell them what I was doing when it was too late for them to complain.

"Leave him alone, Emmett, I've done the same thing plenty of times," Jasper said.

"Well, Edward's not a slut like you," grimaced Emmett.

"Ignore him," grinned Jasper. "He's turning into an old woman."

I proceeded to disappoint Jasper by telling him I was still a virgin and likely to remain so for a while yet, then brushed him off and went to my room to get on with some work. The website I was working on was almost done and I just needed to make a few finishing touches before I could present it to the client. I fired up the desktop computer and launched the programme, then opened up my email account, thinking I should probably check my messages first. There were several newsletters and ads that I ignored and one from my client telling me I needn't rush with finishing the site as he had been called away urgently and would be out of town until the end of the week. There was one other email from an address that was horribly familiar - imswan at gmail.

"Fuck," I muttered. My stomach turned over and my mouth went dry. She had seen me with Jacob just a few nights ago and had sent the email on Saturday. I hadn't checked my mail in two days, too busy enjoying myself with him.

I ticked the box next to the message and hovered over the 'delete' button. I didn't want to read anything from her, it was bound to be some of her usual screwed up shit. But somehow I couldn't do it. Much as I knew it wouldn't do me any good, curiosity got the better of me and I couldn't stop myself opening up the mail. It had an attachment, but I read the message first.

_'Hello, Edward. I don't know whether you'll even read this message, but I hope you do. I know I treated you badly and I'm sorry, although I know that won't mean anything to you and it's not the point of me contacting you. I have to say I'm surprised you're with Jacob. I'm hoping for your sake it's just a bit of fun or an experiment. It's not really my place to say, but Jacob likes girls too much to ever settle down with a guy. I don't suppose you'll believe a word I say, but maybe the attached will stop you making a big mistake. Bella.'_

"Fucking bitch," I said shakily. Even now, months later, she still wanted to kick me in the teeth. Jacob loved me, I knew he did. He said it often enough and he showed me every time he looked at me, held my hand, touched me, took his time when he knew I was nervous. I opened the attachment.

The photograph showed Jacob's head and shoulders as he lay asleep in a bed which clearly wasn't his own. Snuggled up to him, lips almost touching his nose, was a girl with a mass of wild curls, huge dark eyes and bare breasts. The picture was dark and a little blurry as if it had been taken with a camera phone in a dim light with no flash, but it was clear enough what had been happening. The date visible in the bottom right hand corner of the photograph made my heart shatter and my eyes blur with tears - it was taken on Thursday, four days ago.


	13. Chapter 13

**Thank you for all the great reviews on the last chapter. Here's the explanation of the photograph.**

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

******Jacob's POV**

I was late finishing work Monday. We had a number of bookings at the shop, including two services, an exhaust system change, upgrading of brakes and a new gearbox. Seth carried out the services while I worked on the brakes and then we started the exhaust system together. We ate lunch late and then Alec came over with his Trans Am, complaining that the brakes were squealing. They hadn't made a sound when he pulled up outside and Seth spoke to him quickly.

"You don't need to keep doing that now, I told Jacob."

Alec flushed slightly and I smirked as I drove the vehicle with the gearbox issue onto the lift. I jumped out and began raising the lift and Seth reluctantly sent Alec packing, telling him we had a busy day and he would call him later. I took the opportunity to send a text message to Edward, telling him more or less the same thing - I would probably be working late and I would call him as soon as I finished. I ended the text with 'I love you' and shoved the phone back into my pocket. Starting work on removing the old gearbox from the car above us, I didn't notice that Edward didn't reply to the message and when I checked the phone a while later, I guessed he was probably busy himself. I knew he had a website to finish and when he got engrossed in his computers, I could be standing next to him screaming his name and he wouldn't notice.

The gearbox was a pain in the butt and the pair of us considered finishing it Tuesday morning, but knowing we already had a full day booked, we continued and finally wrapped it up and took the car off the lift just before seven. I thanked Seth for staying late and he took off, pulling his phone out to call Alec before he was even out the door. I locked up and called Edward as I walked over to the house. I still hadn't had a reply to my text and I thought it a little strange. He wouldn't still be working now, he would have stopped for dinner with his family. He didn't answer my call and after five rings it went to voicemail. Frowning, I left a message.

"Hey, baby, where are you? Didn't you get my message? I finished work at last, just going to take a shower and get some dinner. Call me, I miss you, been looking forward to hearing your voice all day. I love you."

I hung up, disappointed, and took the phone into the bathroom with me while I showered in case he called back in the next fifteen minutes. He didn't call and I grabbed a frozen dinner, threw it into the microwave and hovered, staring hopefully at my phone. Where was he?

I ate dinner, washed my plate and fork and snatched up my phone again, punching the green button twice to call him again. As before, it went to voicemail and I hung up without leaving a message, wondering if he was ok. Perhaps he was sick, but surely he would have at least sent me a text message. If something else had happened to him, such as an accident, I would have thought maybe Jasper or at least one of them would have let me know. I didn't know either of his brothers' phone numbers otherwise I would have called.

It wasn't much longer before I began to wonder if somehow I had upset Edward and I thought about our parting that morning - hurried kisses in my truck, reluctantly letting go of each other - the last thing he said to me was 'I love you, Jacob' before he jumped out of the vehicle and stood watching as I drove away. I began to worry and even considered calling the hospital to see if Carlisle was on duty and ask him about Edward, but I held back from doing that. I had only officially met Carlisle the day before and his son just spent the night with me - I didn't particularly want to call him it case it seemed cocky.

The evening crawled by and I tried calling Edward one more time before I went to bed, but again he didn't answer. I left another message.

"Edward, where are you? Please call me, I'm worried about you and I miss you. I hope you're ok; let me know. I love you, baby."

I slept fitfully and by morning there had been no call and no message. My stomach knotted up with worry and my heart skipped unevenly. Where was he? Why didn't he call? I didn't get it and I felt sick without really knowing why. I was so desperate to hear his voice that I almost raced over to his house before breakfast, but I didn't think the Cullens would appreciate me turning up so early without warning. I sent him another text and chewed my nails until it was time to open the shop. Seth had just arrived when I walked over there and he noticed immediately something was wrong.

"Are you ok, Jake? You look like hell," he said.

"I don't know, I didn't hear from Edward last night, he didn't call or text or anything, I'm worried about him."

"Maybe he's sick," Seth said.

"He would have sent me a text at least."

"Maybe he was busy."

"Too busy to let me know?"

"I don't know, why don't you call him again?"

"I called him three times last night and I sent him a text this morning already. Nothing." I pulled my phone out again and called anyway, but once again there was no answer. I didn't leave another message, but instead concentrated on work. There was too much to do to leave it for Seth although I decided I would go to Edward's house the minute I finished and find out what was going on.

The day passed slowly. Although we were busy, I couldn't get my mind off Edward. I felt sick and miserable and I knew something was wrong although I had no idea what. When we finished the last service at four o'clock, Seth said he would hang around in case anything else came in, telling me I should go home, get a shower and go see Edward. He knew I had called a couple more times throughout the day and received no answer.

By five I was parking in front of the Cullens' house, my heart in my mouth. I rang the bell and no one answered. I knew everyone's cars by now and could see that both Carlisle's and Esme's were missing, but Edward's and his brothers' were all parked up in their usual places. I punched the bell again and then knocked as well. Another minute passed and then the door opened to reveal Jasper with a look on his face that would curdle milk.

"What do you want?"

My mouth fell open.

"Well?" Jasper prompted. He stood with his feet planted firmly in the doorway, hands on hips, a clear indication that I wasn't about to be invited in.

"Where's Edward?" I asked. "Is he ok?"

"Not really, no. What have you done to him?"

"Nothing! What do you mean, what have I done to him? The last time I saw him was yesterday morning. I told him I love him like I always do and said I would call him when I finished work. Since then he's not been answering his phone or his messages..."

"No, he's too busy crying his eyes out!" Jasper snapped. "What did you do, you bastard?"

"I told you, I haven't done anything. I _love_ him!" I exclaimed, horrified. "Let me see him. I don't know what's upset him, but it sure as hell wasn't me."

"Well, if that's the case, why isn't he talking to you? Surely if it was something else, he'd have told you; he tells you everything, doesn't he?"

"Apparently not. He hasn't said anything to you?"

"No, he won't talk. He locked his door, but I heard him crying through the wall half the night."

"Fuck," I muttered, racking my brains for an idea of what could have happened. We saw Bella on Friday. "Shit!" I gasped suddenly. "Bella saw us together in Forks a few days ago. She must have done something. I swear, Jasper, I haven't hurt him, I couldn't. Let me see him, please."

"What the hell's going on?" Emmett appeared behind Jasper at that moment, a similar expression on his face to that of his brother's. "If you've done something to Edward, I'll knock your fucking head off, Jacob!" he growled.

"He says he hasn't done anything. He and Edward saw Bella in town a few days back," Jasper said.

"Emmett, I would never hurt Edward if my life depended on it," I said. "I love him. Let me talk to him and sort this out."

"Let him in," Emmett said after a moment, taking a step back. "But you're not going to be alone with him."

"Fine, so long as I can talk to him, that's all I want," I nodded. Jasper turned away and I followed him up the stairs to Edward's room, Emmett behind me. He continued along the landing to his own room and hovered in the doorway.

"Edward!" Jasper called, knocked on his door. "You alright?"

"Go away, Jasper!" Edward replied. His voice sounded hoarse and I chewed my lip and wrung my hands.

"For God's sake, Ed, let me in, will you? Jacob's here." Jasper tried the door as he spoke and finding it unlocked, he pushed it open. He stood to one side and I looked in, seeing Edward sitting on the edge of his bed, his hands pressed between his knees, hair all tousled and standing on end, eyes red and swollen from crying. He looked completely crushed and my heart clenched. I hurried into the room and dropped to my knees in front of him.

"Edward, what's wrong? What happened?" I grabbed his wrists and pulled his hands free, then took them in mine, but he jerked away and scooted backwards away from me.

"Don't, Jacob, leave me alone," he whispered.

"I'm not going to leave you in this state, let me help," I said. "Tell me what's wrong, please. I love you, Edward, you know you can tell me anything," I coaxed.

His lips trembled and fresh tears spilled down his cheeks. "I trusted you," he choked. "I let you get closer to me than anybody else. You knew everything. I told you everything she did to me, so how could you...how could you be with someone else?"

"What? What are you talking about?" I gasped. "Someone else?"

"Is it because I wasn't ready to sleep with you?" He put his hands over his face and began to sob.

"What the fuck, Jacob?" Jasper growled. "You cheated on him?"

"I don't know what he's talking about," I said shakily and reached out to touch Edward's knee. "Edward, I don't know what you mean. There's only you; don't you know that?"

He jerked away from me again, lurched off the bed and grabbed his laptop which sat on the nearby desk. Roughly pulling the lid up, he turned it towards me so I could see the picture which filled the screen - a picture of me in bed with a girl. I was clearly asleep and she had taken the picture with her phone or something. I had never seen it before, but it was the date on it that shocked me. It indicated the photo had been taken the day before I was in Forks with Edward.

"Only me?" Edward cried. "Then who is that?"

"You piece of shit! Get the fuck out of here!" Emmett charged into the room suddenly, grabbed me by one arm and the back of my neck and hauled me to my feet. "You asshole!" he snarled. "You know how hard it was for Edward to trust you? How the hell could you do something like this? Decide you missed pussy, did you?"

"That picture's fixed!" I gasped, struggling to escape his grip and failing.

"Oh, you mean someone Photoshopped you into it just to make you look bad? It looks pretty fucking genuine to me, Jacob!" Emmett spat.

"No! I mean, I know the girl, but..."

"So you did sleep with her?" Jasper put in, his eyes wide and horrified.

"Yes! But it was months ago, when I first split with Bella!" I cried. I remembered the pretty brunette with the dark eyes. She had seemed like a sweet girl and I spent one night with her and took her number in the morning, but I never called her. She was one of the half dozen or so I made use of to try and make myself feel better.

"Yeah, you would say that! Cheating piece of shit!" Jasper exclaimed. "That's what you do when you're not seeing Edward, is it? Can't make your mind up? I thought it was weird a guy like you would suddenly decide he liked boys and not look back."

"I've always liked boys!" I cried desperately. "I was fantasising about my best friend in school! Fuck..." What the hell was I telling him that for? It was hardly going to improve the situation. "Edward, listen to me," I said, still struggling to fight Emmett off as he began to shove me towards the door. "I know you don't believe me right now, but check the photo. You're an expert on this stuff, you must be able to see if it was altered or something. There is no way in hell it was taken last week. You are everything to me. I love you with all my heart and I would ___never _do something like that to you. That girl was a one-night thing when I was at a low point after Bella. I'm not proud of it; there were a few of them. I didn't even know she took the photo. How did you even get it?"

"Bella," Edward whispered.

Jasper glanced from him to me and frowned before looking up at Emmett. "Maybe he is telling the truth. That's just the sort of thing she'd do."

"Bullshit. Of course he's going to say something like that to try and get out of it. You fucker, Black. You should think yourself lucky I'm not kicking the shit out of you right now, but Mom will be pissed if I get blood on her nice carpet. Get out!"

There was nothing I could do as he began hustling me out of the room and towards the stairs. I was a big strong guy, but no match for Emmett and I almost fell as he marched me downstairs. I heard Edward begin to sob again and Jasper's voice talking to him a second before the bedroom door closed. Then I was being shoved out of the front door onto the porch.

"Now get off our fucking property and don't even think about coming back!" Emmett hissed and slammed the door in my face so hard that it shook in its frame and made the glass panel rattle.

I stood there for several minutes, stunned and uncomprehending. All I wanted to do was wrap my arms around Edward and tell him how much I loved him, but right now he didn't believe me or trust me. He probably thought I'd just been playing with him and with his lack of confidence, even now, he must be crushed. I felt sick, but there was nothing I could do about it. Even if Jasper and Emmett weren't guarding him like the Hounds of the Baskervilles, I couldn't force him to listen to me. I could only hope he would examine the photo and discover I was telling the truth. In the meantime, there was one thing I could do.

I got in the truck and drove home, then pulled out my phone and searched through the contacts. The girl's name was Miranda and when I came to her number I called it without hesitation. She answered after a couple of rings with a simple 'hello'.

"Hey, is that Miranda?"

"Yes?"

"It's Jacob Black. We met a few months ago in..."

"I remember," she interrupted. "I didn't expect to hear from you again."

"I'm sorry," I said automatically.

"It's ok. I knew it was just a one-night thing. So why are you calling now?"

"You took a photo of us..." I began.

"Um...yes..." She giggled in an embarrassed fashion. "I liked you; as I said, I knew it was only one night, but I wanted a memento. Wait, how do you know about the photo?"

"I'm in a relationship and my partner has been sent that photo by email by someone who wants to spoil things for us. I need to know how they could have gotten hold of the photo and whether it had a date on it."

"A date? No, it was just a camera phone snap, I don't have a date function on my phone."

"Added later then," I muttered.

"I don't know how anyone could have gotten it though, it's still in my phone, but it's not anywhere else."

"Do you know Bella Swan?" I asked her.

"A little, she's friends with my older sister. She's your ex, isn't she? I've only seen her a couple of times, usually they go out if they see each other."

"Shit," I muttered. "That must be it. Either your sister or Bella..."

"I'm so sorry," Miranda said. "I'm always leaving my phone lying around in the apartment. My sister has seen the picture so maybe they talked about it and she sent it to Bella."

"It's not your fault," I sighed.

"Maybe I could speak to your girlfriend and explain?" she suggested.

"I'm seeing a guy," I admitted.

"Oh! Well, I could speak to him, if you want."

"I don't think he'd listen to you right now, but thanks for the offer. I'll let you know if I think it'll help," I told her.

We ended the conversation a minute later and I tossed my phone onto the bed, clenching my fists. Bella, that bitch. She had seen Edward and me holding hands, happy together, and been unable to resist trying to spoil it for us. I wanted to tear over to her house right away and have it out with her, but I knew I would be in danger of resorting to physical violence, which wouldn't do anybody any good. There was a better way to get her back. Fix it with Edward and rub her nose in it - show her that we were solid and in love and nothing she could do would hurt us.

A little while later my phone beeped with a text message and I pounced on it, praying it was from Edward, but it was Seth asking if I heard from him. I called him and explained what had happened.

"Fucking evil tramp!" was his immediate response. "What are you going to do?"

"There's not much I can do until one of them gets in touch with me. I just hope Edward will check over the photo and be able to see it's been tampered with."

It was two more days before I heard anything. I sent one text to Edward each day, just to tell him I loved him. I didn't suppose for a minute it would make any difference to the way he was feeling if he was convinced I had betrayed him, but I didn't want to not contact him at all in case he thought I had just walked away. I barely ate or slept in that time and Seth and Embry both hung out with me in the evenings, trying to take my mind off it.

Jasper actually called me Thursday much to my surprise and told me that Edward had examined the photo and discovered that it had been edited the day after Bella saw us. I told him I had spoken to Miranda and she had said that there was originally no date on the photograph. I gave him her phone number and suggested he talk to her, although he didn't confirm whether he would or not. He ended the call after saying that Edward was still upset and that he didn't know if he would be in touch with me or not. I went back to worrying and longing for Edward, repeatedly looking at the photo of him that I had in my phone and silently begging him to contact me.

Friday passed slowly and I decided that whatever happened, I would go over to the Cullens' house Saturday morning and demand to see Edward. I didn't even know whether Carlisle and Esme would have been told what was going on, but since Jasper hadn't mentioned them the day before, I just got the feeling the three brothers were keeping it between themselves. I doubted Edward would want his parents to start worrying about him again and at least this was a small relief for me. If Carlisle thought I fucked with his youngest son after they had made me welcome, it would be much more difficult to sort out.

I tried calling Jasper after work, having saved his number after he called me, but he didn't answer and I didn't leave a message. I went to take a shower and then forced some food down my neck, having no appetite, but not wanting to make myself ill while I moped and pined. It looked like my only option would be to try to see him in the morning and I was a mess of nerves as I thought about it.

I went to bed early, before ten, doubting I would sleep much but trying to relax in an effort to not think and worry. Somehow I did manage to settle down and I was just drifting into sleep when a knock on the door startled me. I shot upright in the darkness, my heart thumping and slid out of bed again.

"Please be Edward," I whispered to myself. I didn't really think it would be him, but I couldn't imagine anyone else turning up late at night without calling.

I grabbed a pair of shorts and pulled them on before I padded silently down the hallway to the door, not bothering to switch a light on. I unlocked the door and opened it and there stood Edward on the porch. He was pale and drawn, hair as wild as ever as if he had been tugging at it all day, his teeth worrying at his lower lip. My heart leaped into my mouth and for a second I was speechless.

"Edward!" I gasped, sounding as if I couldn't catch my breath.

"I..." He licked his lips and started again. "I'm sorry, Jacob. I'm sorry I doubted you."

"It's alright," I said at once, almost sagging with relief. For an instant I had expected to hear him say something else. Perhaps something like, 'It's over, I don't trust you.'

"I can't blame you. I would have had doubts too, seeing that picture," I added.

"But I should have known something was wrong with it, since Bella sent it. I checked the photo properties; it was edited on Saturday. The date must have been added then."

"Bella must have added it," I said. "I talked to the girl. She said her sister is friends with Bella and that she must have sent it to her."

"I know," Edward nodded. "Jasper called the girl too. She texted him the original picture and told him she only ever met you once months ago and that you were obviously on the rebound. I can't believe Bella almost broke us up. Well, I can believe it of her, I just don't know why I would trust anything she said. I'm so sorry. I don't want to lose you, Jacob, I love you." His eyes filled with tears now and one spilled over and trickled down his left cheek.

"Hey, stop that, come here." I reached out to him and pulled him into the house, closed the door and drew him into my arms. He pressed his face into my neck and I felt his hands come to rest on my back as he held onto me. "I would never do anything to hurt you, Edward," I whispered. "I love you so much. You're all I want; all I'm ever going to want."

"You're all I want too," Edward murmured.

I hugged him tighter. "Do your family know you're here?"

"Jasper and Emmett do. They wanted me to wait until tomorrow, but I couldn't. We never told Mom and Dad what was going on, they worried about me enough this year. I just pretended I was sick with a bad stomach and stayed in my room."

I loosened my hold on him and pulled back enough so that I could meet his eyes. He blinked rapidly and took his hands off me to scrub them over his cheeks, giving me the smile I had missed so much since Monday morning.

"Will you stay with me?" I asked.

"I was hoping you'd say that. I brought my toothbrush."

He dropped his eyes and I would have been willing to bet if it had been light enough to see, his cheeks would be pink. I locked the door again, grasped his hand and led him slowly to my room, silently thanking God that he hadn't simply shut me out. Now I had the whole night to be with him and I planned to make the most of every minute.


	14. Chapter 14

**Thank you to everyone for reading and reviewing as always. Hope you enjoy this one!**

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

**Jacob's POV**

Edward slid his jacket off and laid it on the chair in the corner of my room, then stepped out of his shoes. I left the light off and got back into the bed, watching as he slowly unbuttoned his shirt. My cock stiffened rapidly and I almost held my breath as he unfastened the shirt cuffs and slid the garment off his shoulders. He was taking his time, still shyly avoiding my eyes and to me it seemed like the most erotic thing in the world. I reached down under the sheet and palmed myself through my shorts as Edward unbuckled his belt and lowered his zipper. Jesus, I wanted to jump out of the bed again and tear his clothes off of him, but I stayed where I was, my mouth watering and my erection twitching impatiently under my hand as he removed his pants and socks, hesitated for a moment and then removed his shorts as well. I almost groaned and I quickly wriggled out of my own shorts and tossed them over the edge of the bed as he came to join me.

I turned onto my side to face him and drew him into my arms, my cock bumping his stomach. He smiled and pressed himself closer, his hand touching my face. I brushed my lips against his, teasing them apart and then plunging my tongue in as he slid his hand to the back of my neck. His tongue played with mine and I groaned as I felt him hardening, his erection nudging me as it rose between us and then lay against the length of mine. I reached down and grasped both together, rubbing them against each other until Edward turned his face away from me, gasping for breath and whimpering. I kicked the sheet off the bed and drew away, turning him onto his back and pushing his legs apart so I could kneel between them. I loved touching and tasting him and I bent down, licking and nibbling at his neck and chest, gently biting his nipples, making him squirm and moan beneath me as I worked my way lower. By the time I reached his cock, the head was wet with pre-cum and I flicked the tip of my tongue over it, tasting him and teasing.

"Oh, God, please..." he moaned.

My tongue circled the mushroom-shaped head again and I opened my mouth to draw it in, sucking gently. Edward's hands fisted in the sheet beneath him and he thrust his hips upwards, pushing himself deeper into my mouth until he hit the back of my throat. I grunted in surprise, but encouraged him, gripping his hips and guiding him into a steady rhythm fucking my mouth before I let go with one hand and grabbed the lube, quickly coating my fingers. Then I pulled my mouth off of him and sat up a little, earning a groan of frustration from him as he opened his eyes and looked at me.

"Don't stop," he gasped.

"Just relax." I took the opportunity to grasp my own cock and rub it firmly as I reached between his legs and stroked him with slick fingers, feeling for his tight hole and coating it in lube, pressing gently with the tip of one finger until it slid into him. He tensed up for a second, but then relaxed almost immediately, drawing his knees up and pushing himself against my hand, encouraging me to bury my finger inside him as deep as I could reach.

"Touch yourself," I said.

"Oh...I..." He was about to protest, but as I curled my finger upwards, searching for his sweet spot and quickly finding it, he merely groaned and wrapped his hand around his cock. I watched as his hand slid slowly up and down, his eyes closed again, teeth biting into his lower lip. He was self-conscious about it, but too aroused not to do it.

"That's it, keep doing that, you look so damn hot, Edward," I encouraged.

"Mmm..." His lip slipped from between his teeth and he panted and groaned, his hand picking up speed. Cautiously I worked a second finger inside him, watching his face for signs of discomfort. He grimaced and slowed his hand movements for a moment, but he stayed relaxed and after a moment he was rubbing himself eagerly again. I moved both fingers slowly in and out and lowered my head again towards his cock, flicking my tongue against it until he held it still and guided it back into my mouth. I sucked hard, letting him thrust himself into my throat, stroking myself urgently with my free hand. As I felt the tension building up in Edward, my own orgasm approached rapidly and I worked my hand faster, imagining it wasn't my fingers inside him, but my cock. He was so hot and tight and I squeezed myself harder as I visualised my body covering his, his muscles gripping me as we came together. Just as I thought of this, I began to spurt into my own hand and Edward filled my mouth with his warm fluid, his muscles tightening more around my fingers, his lips gasping my name.

I wiped my hand on the sheet and withdrew my fingers slowly, then stretched out beside him on the bed and slid my arm around him. He was panting hard, his chest heaving and I dropped a light kiss onto his shoulder.

"You have no idea how sexy you are, do you?"

He chuckled softly and turned over to face me. "It's not really a word I've ever applied to myself."

"Maybe you should start," I smirked. "I never felt like this; I never wanted anyone this much."

"I love you," Edward whispered.

I drew him closer and kissed him. "I love you too."

Ordinarily I would have wanted to play again, but I was exhausted I realised, no doubt from the week spent worrying and longing for Edward and now I reached down to grab the sheet and pull it over us again. Edward slid away from me, retrieved his toothbrush from his jacket and went to the bathroom and when he returned, I wrapped my arms around him and closed my eyes, knowing that sleep would be quick to take me.

When I woke the next morning I was alone, but when I stretched my hand out towards the place Edward had occupied, it was still warm and I realised he hadn't been gone long. His clothes were still lying around the room and I got up to go to the bathroom, finding it empty and guessing he must have gone to make coffee or something. I returned to bed, deciding to wait for him to come back, quickly becoming aroused again at the thought of him snuggling up to me, wanting to play some more. I glanced at the clock and noticed with dismay that it was seven-thirty. Seth would be on his way to the garage and work was the last place I wanted to be right then. I grabbed my phone and called him.

"Hey, Jake," he answered after a few seconds.

"Hey, what have we got on today?" I asked.

"Not much, just a service and finishing up the Ram from yesterday. Why?"

"Will you be pissed if I don't come in?" I grinned.

Seth laughed. "Well, you don't sound miserable so I'm guessing the reason is that Edward's back?"

"Yeah."

"I can manage," he said. "Go screw his brains out or something."

I chuckled, but didn't correct him. "Thanks. I'll see you Monday."

I hung up the phone and rolled over. Where was Edward anyway? I couldn't hear anything from the kitchen, but a moment later, much to my surprise, I heard the sound of the piano. Just odd notes at first and then a scale. I sat up in bed quickly and listened. He played a short simple warm-up and then began a classical piece that I recognised from when my sisters had played - Beethoven's 'Moonlight Sonata'. I hadn't heard it for years and it occurred to me that Edward was easily putting Rebecca and Rachel's playing to shame. They played with rigid and clinical perfection, whereas I could tell just by listening that he really felt the music as he played. I slid out of the bed again, pulled my shorts on and went into the other room. Edward appeared engrossed, his fingers seeming to almost stroke the piano keys, his eyes half closed and I watched entranced for several minutes before he became aware of me and stopped quickly, flushing.

"Um...sorry, you said I could..."

"Please don't stop, I love that piece of music," I said at once. I went over to him and sat down astride the long piano stool, leaning over to kiss his cheek and resting my hand on his back. He was wearing his shorts and one of my t-shirts. "My sisters used to play Beethoven," I added. "They were nowhere near as good as you."

Edward grinned and after a moment resumed playing. I sat in silence, watching his hands and occasionally glancing at his face, wondering if I was the only person who became turned on by sitting by their lover while he played the piano, or if there was someone else, somewhere, doing the same thing. When he finally came to the end of the piece and lowered the lid over the keys, I edged closer and slid my arms around him.

"That was amazing." I turned his face towards me and gave him a light kiss. "I'm not working today. Will you come back to bed for a while?"

"Ok."

We returned to my room and I dropped my shorts quickly and dived into the bed, propping the pillows against the wall and resting against them, half sitting up as I watched Edward remove my t-shirt and then his shorts. He was as hard as I was and smirked when he caught me looking.

"Come here." I caught his hand and tugged him onto the bed, manoeuvring him so that he kneeled astride my thighs. His cock curved up against his stomach, quivering with anticipation and mine throbbed eagerly. I pulled him closer to me, sliding my hand between us and grasping both shafts together, rubbing them against each other as he lowered his head to kiss me. He moaned into my mouth and writhed on my lap and I reached out with my free hand, groping for the lube until I found the bottle and grabbed it. I coated my fingers and slid my arm around him, reaching down between his cheeks and stroking, pushing one finger into him and then a second. He shivered and pulled his mouth away from mine, pressing his face into my neck. I slid both fingers deeper, withdrew and then thrust in again while I worked both our cocks with the other hand.

"Oh, God," Edward moaned. "Please...more...I want you..."

My hammering heart quickened his pace. Was he really ready to take things further?

"You want me to make love to you?" I murmured.

"Yes..."

I took my hand off both of us quickly, fearing I wouldn't last a minute if I didn't calm down at least a little before we started. I had longed for this moment and now it was here, I was stupidly nervous. The boy I had spent one night with after Bella, and Brady too, had both known what they were doing. It was Edward's first time and I wanted to make it good for him and I was all too aware that he would probably worry that he would fail me somehow after his one disastrous attempt with Bella. I withdrew my fingers slowly and shifted my position slightly.

"Shall I...um...lie down or something?" he asked awkwardly, flushing and avoiding my eyes.

"No, stay there. It's probably better if you control the pace until you're comfortable," I said and immediately felt him stiffen. Damn. "It'll be ok, I'll guide you," I added. "Just open the top drawer of the bed table, there are some condoms in there."

He leaned over and then straightened up, dropping the condom packet onto the bed beside me. I squeezed more lube into my hand, liberally coating my fingers before pushing them back into him, scissoring them gradually to stretch him and cuddling him tight against me with the other arm. He quickly relaxed and squirmed against me, his hard cock twitching against mine as I continued preparing him, pushing both him and myself dangerously close to orgasm as I did so. Eventually I added a third finger, stilling the movement when he moaned in discomfort, waiting for him to get used to the invasion before I resumed the movement, not stopping until he was writhing against me once more, eagerly pushing himself down onto my hand. Then at last I pulled my fingers out, ripped open the condom packet and rolled it onto my cock, aching to feel his tight muscles around me. I applied a generous amount of lube to my length and then pulled Edward up onto his knees, guiding myself beneath him until my head was lined up with his entrance. I pushed upwards slowly, attempting to breach the tight ring of muscle that my fingers had slipped past just moments before, but he was too tense, thighs rigid and quivering either side of me and his nails digging into my shoulders.

"Sorry," he whispered.

"Do you want me to stop?"

"No."

"Just relax, Edward, it's ok," I coaxed.

He loosened up a little and when I tried again, my head gradually entered him. I took my hand off the base of my cock and gripped his hips, supporting his weight and encouraging him to lower himself slowly. He sank down a little, his tight heat beginning to swallow me up, but he was trembling with the effort of holding himself up and let out a groan of pain. His erection subsided and he pulled off me suddenly.

"Shit...I'm sorry...I can't relax like that. I'm sorry," he repeated miserably, his face scarlet.

"Sshh, stop saying you're sorry, it's fine," I whispered, wrapping both arms around him. Damnit, if we didn't do this, I could see the small amount of confidence he had gained crashing down around his ears. "Let me try something else." I rolled him onto his back so that I was on top, my body resting between his thighs and my weight supported partly on my knees and one elbow. "Let yourself go limp...like when I touched you there the first time."

He breathed deep and I scattered light kisses along his jaw and up one cheek to his temple, waiting for him to relax before I tried to enter him again. This time he stayed relaxed as I pushed the head in and I held still for a moment before I slid forward another inch or two, suppressing a groan with difficulty as his tight heat slowly enveloped me. I stopped again and brushed my lips against his.

"Are you ok?"

"Mm hmm."

"Let me know if you want me to stop."

"Mmm..."

I watched his face as I slid the rest of my length into him and although he bit his lip and sucked his breath in, he stayed relaxed and after a minute I began to move slowly, an inch at a time, out and in until he started to move with me, his body responding to my gentle thrusts and his cock quickly hardening again, jabbing into my stomach. I propped myself up to give him a little more room and he quickly took the hint and began to touch himself, jerking off eagerly. I started to move faster, panting with the effort of holding myself up and suppressing my longing to let go and pound him into the mattress. As it was, I held myself back determinedly, more concerned that he enjoy it than whether I even finished or not.

"Oh, God, Jacob," Edward gasped, his hand moving faster suddenly, his head rolling back on the pillows, his muscles clenching around me as he came hard. I glanced down, watching the thick white fluid paint his chest and I thrust deeper, finally allowing myself to let go and filling the condom quickly. I carefully withdrew and disposed of the rubber, then rolled onto my side and pulled Edward into my arms, grinning as I felt the wet stickiness of his fluid between our chests. I brushed my lips against his.

"How do you feel?"

He opened his eyes slowly. "Amazing."

"I didn't hurt you?"

He shook his head. "Only a little...at first. Was I ok? I mean, you can say if I wasn't..."

"Edward, don't even think that," I said at once. "I love you and you felt awesome...you made me feel awesome."

"Thank you," he whispered and then grinned suddenly. "I'm glad I didn't wait any longer."

"Me too. Do you want to shower with me?"

"Yeah." He chuckled and flushed, peeling his chest away from mine and grimacing.

He slid out of the bed and went into the bathroom and by the time I joined him, he was already standing under the hot spray, lathering himself up with shower gel. I stepped into the stall with him and we took our time washing each other, then dried off, dressed and went to make breakfast. I grilled bacon and Edward made scrambled eggs and we discussed what we would do with the rest of the day. Edward sent a text to Jasper to let him know he was spending the day with me and I eyed him across the kitchen counter, shovelling forkfuls of eggs into his mouth with one hand and texting with the other, his chaotic hair sticking out all over his head as it dried and I couldn't help imagining us doing this together every day. Would he ever want to live with me? Wake up with me every morning, cook together, fall into bed together every night and make love?

"What are you thinking?"

I started, realising Edward was looking at me curiously as I daydreamed and stared right through him. "Just how lucky I am," I grinned.

"You're easy to please."

He put his phone down and I reached across the counter and grasped his hand in mine. "Just the opposite. The only one who can please me is you. I love you, Edward."

"I love you."

I drew his hand up to my mouth and kissed his knuckles, then got to my feet quickly and gathered up the breakfast things. "Whose car are we going in?"

"Mine, since it's here," Edward said at once. "I'll let you drive, if you like."

I finished getting ready quickly, grabbed my wallet and phone and ten minutes later I was driving Edward's Skyline off the Reservation. We headed over to PA, deciding to go out on the whale-watching boat again and then try out one of the many seafood restaurants close to the harbour. It was after nine in the evening by the time we returned home and I asked Edward to stay over again although I thought he would decide he should go home.

"My parents will probably have plenty to say to me when I get home," he grimaced. "And Jasper, God forbid. I can only imagine what he'll say to me, it'll certainly be more embarrassing than anything Mom and Dad could say. But it won't be any worse tomorrow than it would be today."

I grinned. "Good because I don't want to let you out of my sight just yet."

Edward went into the kitchen to make some coffee and I switched the television on. They were showing one of the Predator movies and I left the channel on until Edward returned. Somehow I didn't think horror would be his thing, but he placed the mugs on the table in front of the sofa and curled up next to me with a smile.

"I haven't seen this movie for years. Emmett has the DVDs and Jasper and I borrowed them once when we were about thirteen and fourteen and scared the shit out of ourselves. We both had bad dreams and Mom went crazy at Emmett the next day. He said if we had nightmares it was just punishment since we stole them out of his room. Jasper was livid that he didn't stand up for us."

I laughed. "I did a similar thing with Embry and Quil, only we got one of my sisters' boyfriends to rent one of the movies for us. Em had the nightmares and his Mom wouldn't let him see me and Quil for the rest of the summer. She came over to our house and gave my Dad an ear-bashing for letting us watch R rated movies. He just laughed and said a bit of a scare never hurt anybody, it would toughen us up."

We watched the movie and drank the coffee and eventually I found myself paying more attention to Edward than what was happening on the TV. He was snuggling against me, occasionally kissing my cheek or nibbling my ear, his breath hot on my neck and I rapidly stiffened, adjusting myself a couple of times in an effort to make myself more comfortable in the stupid tight jeans I was wearing. I turned my head towards Edward and captured his lips with mine, forgetting about the movie altogether as he responded heatedly. I plunged my tongue in, tasting coffee and a moment later felt his hand on me, starting to unfasten my pants. He fumbled with the buttons, taking what seemed like forever, his hand repeatedly brushing against me until I was moaning into his mouth, desperate to be free of my clothes and in his hand. At last my jeans were undone and he reached into my boxers and pulled my cock free, stroking it tormentingly slowly and lightly. I turned my head away from him eventually, struggling to breathe.

"God, Edward," I groaned as he ran his thumb over the head of my cock, teasing the slit. "I want you..."

"Can we do it here?"

"We can do it anywhere you like," I panted.

"I'll be back in a minute."

He got up and left me alone and I took the opportunity to get rid of my clothes, surprised that he was instigating things. I guessed his first time must have been good enough for him to get over his fears. He returned a minute later with the lube and a condom, naked except for his shorts which were tenting out at the front.

"Hey, you forgot something." I reached out before he could sit down, hooked my thumbs into the waistband of his shorts and pulled them down, freeing his cock which bobbed eagerly in front of him. I drew him closer to me and captured the tip in my mouth, sucking on it gently until he moaned and pushed me off.

"Don't, I'll come before we even do anything."

I released him and leaned back, wondering what he had in mind. He seemed to know what he wanted and he put the lube and condom down on the table within easy reach and then climbed onto the sofa, a knee either side of me and settled on my lap, his cock bumping mine. I slid my arms around him at once and stroked my hands down his back to his butt, squeezing and pulling him in tighter against me.

"I want to try this again," he said.

"That works for me."

I shifted under him a little and he slid one hand between us, teasing me and himself at the same time. I was already aching and longing to be inside him, remembering the amazing feel of his tight heat surrounding me that morning. I reached out towards the table and grabbed the lube, coating my fingers quickly and beginning to prepare him. Each time I touched him it became easier for him and he stayed relaxed as I stretched him, grabbing the condom after a couple of minutes and tearing the packet open. I made to take it from him, but he shook his head.

"Let me." He rolled it onto me easily and I looked up at him, raising an eyebrow. He grinned. "Would you believe me if I said we had to practise putting them on bananas in Sex Ed at school?"

"I can believe it, there were about five pregnant girls in my junior year, they probably wanted to try and prevent any more."

Edward laughed and squirmed against my hand, then picked up the lube and began coating me in it. I withdrew my fingers, my cock twitching eagerly in response to his sudden desire to take the lead. I held it upright as he rose up on his knees, guiding it until the tip was pushing against him. It slid in a little way and I let go of it, resting my hands on his hips instead to support him. He was much more relaxed than before and he lowered himself slowly, lips parted as he breathed deeply, his hands braced on my shoulders. Gradually I felt myself being swallowed up inside him and I looked down, seeing the last couple of inches disappearing into him, his cock straining eagerly against his belly. I wrapped one hand around it and stroked firmly as he held still, letting himself get used to my size again for a moment before he began to move experimentally, up and down an inch at a time, then more and more until he was riding me rhythmically, his butt slapping against my thighs.

"Christ, Edward, that's so good," I groaned, rubbing him harder and faster as his movements suddenly became erratic with the approach of his orgasm.

"Oh, God...yes..." he gasped, his muscles suddenly squeezing tighter around me as he spilled into my hand. I let go immediately, spurting into the condom, then lifted Edward up and off me for a moment so I could remove it before I wrapped my arms around him and crushed him against me.

"Fuck, that was amazing," I panted. "You feel so good."

"So do you. I'm never going to be able to get enough of this."

I kissed his neck and nibbled gently, tasting salt. "Let's get cleaned up and go to bed."

He slid off me slowly and headed for the bathroom and I followed, delighted to be able to spend another night with him. It was almost as if the last painful week had never happened, but I hadn't forgotten and I didn't intend to just let it go. As soon as the weekend was over, I was going to see Bella to make sure she knew nothing she could do would ever hurt us.


	15. Chapter 15

**Thank you all for reading and reviewing. Sorry it has taken me so long to update this time!**

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

**Edward's POV**

I dragged myself away from Jacob on Sunday morning with difficulty. We made love again first and then showered together and as I drove home I struggled to keep the smile off my face. Finally, I knew what it was all about. Sex was amazing and every nasty thing Bella had ever said to me about what a failure I was ceased to matter. She was a twisted vile creature who had only ever wanted to hurt me for whatever reason and my confidence was at an all time high. Jacob loved me and not only that, he loved making love to me and I felt as if I were floating on an embarrassingly soppy cloud of love and desire like the lead character in a cheesy romance novel.

I straightened my face determinedly as I walked into the house, assuming I looked reasonably nonchalant as I headed up to my room to change into my shorts and t-shirt for my workout. Jasper appeared in his bedroom doorway, still in his pyjama pants and glanced at me, yawning. Then suddenly he stopped mid-yawn and his eyes widened. He scuttled along the landing, shoved me into my room and closed the door behind us.

"How was it?"

"I beg your pardon?" I could feel myself flushing immediately and I turned away and pulled a drawer out, looking for a clean t-shirt.

"Ed-_ward__!"_ Jasper plopped onto my bed, smirking. "You had sex. It's written all over your face!"

"Fuck off," I muttered.

"Shit, you did! You're as red as my pants and you've got this sparkle in your eyes..."

"Will you shush!" I growled, glancing worriedly at the door.

"No one's up here, Dad's at the hospital, Mom's in the kitchen and Emmett's in the gym. So come on, tell me. Did you like it?"

"Jesus, Jasper, why do you have to know every little detail about everything?"

"I suppose because after Bella fucked you up I just wanted you to get better and find someone who really deserved you and be happy. It's a pity Jacob wasn't your first..."

"He was," I said.

"Well, like that, yeah..."

"Jas, I'm going to tell you one time since it pleases you so much and then you can drop it," I said. "I never had sex with Bella. I tried once and it was a disaster, I didn't get off or anything, she was a bitch about it and after that I couldn't even get it up for months. Jacob was my first and it was amazing, all three times." I couldn't help a smug smile at this point.

"Fuck!" Jasper exclaimed. "I'm speechless!"

"You're never speechless, Jasper. I think you're just jealous."

"You know what? You're right," Jasper said with a sigh. "I am. I can get sex at the drop of a hat; Danny couldn't wait to get in my pants a couple of weeks ago, but that's all he wants, just a fuck whenever he feels like it. He doesn't want to date me or kiss and cuddle with me. That's what I want; somebody who actually wants to be with me."

"I'm sorry, Jas," I said, sitting down next to him.

"Don't be. You're happy and I'm glad. It's my own fault, I go about it in the wrong way. I pick guys up in clubs and bars and let them do whatever they want. I know I'm not going to find someone decent like that, I just can't seem to help it."

"I think you're trying to make them like you by doing it. You might find they think more of you if you make them wait. They shouldn't just like you because they can get in your pants, but they're not all after only one thing. Look at Jacob. If I wasn't ready for another year he would have waited," I said confidently.

"For someone who has virtually no experience of relationships, you make a lot of sense," Jasper said.

I chatted to him a little longer and changed into my workout gear, then headed down to the gym to join Emmett. He of course didn't have any idea what I'd been doing and only wanted to know that I was ok and that the photo 'thing' was sorted out once and for all.

Mom cooked Sunday lunch as usual for the four of us as Dad was working all day and although she asked whether I enjoyed my day with Jacob, it didn't prompt any more questions from Jasper, except for him nudging my ankle under the table with his toes and smirking. Jacob called me in the early evening and I quickly went up to my room so I could talk to him without the others listening. We chatted about mundane things for maybe ten minutes while my heart pounded and I struggled not to sound breathless. The minute I heard his voice I was excited and it was mere moments before I began to get hard, even while I told him that Jasper teased me and that I had a good workout.

"I miss you," Jacob said then. "Yesterday was amazing. And this morning."

My cock stiffened fully and strained against my zipper.

"I know," I breathed. "You made it perfect for me."

"Are you alone?" Jacob asked.

"Yes, I'm in my room."

"Does your door have a lock?"

"I already locked it." I immediately knew what was going to happen and I had to bite my lip to suppress a whimper. I lay back on my bed, wondering if Jacob was on his bed or the sofa, if he was still dressed or not. I should have been shy and self-conscious, trying to change the subject back to something mundane, but I just wasn't. We had made love and it had changed everything for me.

"Do you want to play with me?" he murmured.

"Yes."

"Tell me what you're wearing so I can see you in my head."

"Grey pants and a blue shirt," I said. "What about you?"

"Just my shorts."

I groaned. "I think I'm...um...overdressed."

Jacob chuckled softly. "Unfasten your shirt and then slip it off."

"Ok." I began to fumble the buttons undone with my free hand, wishing I had a hands free kit. At last the shirt was loose and I slid one arm out of it and then the other. "It's off."

"Now take your pants off."

"What are you doing?" I asked, sliding my zipper down slowly. My cock throbbed inside my shorts and I rubbed the heel of my hand over it.

"Running my hand up and down my chest and stomach, trying to keep it off my cock until you're ready. I'm so hard it hurts."

I moaned and snatched my hand off myself, then lifted my butt up and shuffled my pants down. A moment later I tossed them off the side of the bed and clenched my fist to stop myself touching my erection. I pulled my feet up quickly and rid myself of my socks before stretching my legs out again.

"I just have my shorts on now," I said. "White cotton."

"Fuck, Edward," Jacob groaned. "I bet there's a damp patch on them around the head of your cock."

"Yes."

"Mine too. Put your hand on it and rub yourself outside your shorts."

"Mmm," I sighed, relieved to at last get my hand on myself. I palmed myself slowly, feeling my erection pulsing eagerly. The damp patch of pre-cum grew a little and I squirmed on the mattress, an image of Jacob in my head doing exactly the same thing, his hand rubbing his thick cock through the fabric of a tight pair of shorts.

"Do you know how much you're turning me on right now?" he said huskily. "I could come in my shorts just listening to you moan like that."

I let out another moan on purpose and heard his breath hiss out suddenly.

"Take your shorts off," I said, deciding I should join in at least a little.

"With pleasure. Yours too." He grunted and shuffled about and I quickly started to wriggle my shorts off, reluctantly taking my hand off my cock for a minute until I was naked. "What do you want me to do now?" I murmured.

"Take hold of your cock, hold it and rub your thumb over the head. That's what I'm doing. Tell me how hard you are."

"I'm aching," I said.

"Do you need to come?"

"Badly."

Jacob groaned loudly. "Me too. I can't wait any longer. Jerk off with me, Edward."

I began to stroke myself eagerly, running my hand up and down my length as I listened to Jacob panting down the phone. I looked down at myself and watched as the head of my cock, swollen and red, emerged from my fist each time I slid it down the shaft, a bead of pre-cum glistening in the slit. I rubbed my thumb over it again and spread it around, making myself leak more. I tried to keep quiet until I remembered what Jacob had said about the sounds I made and then I gasped and moaned, letting him hear how much I was enjoying myself. I didn't need to try to force myself to be loud, I just had to stop restraining myself. My orgasm was approaching rapidly, pressure building up and my balls tightening. I wished again that I had hands free so I could have reached down and tugged on them.

"Fuck," Jacob gasped. "I'm not gonna last much longer. Do something else for me..."

"What do you want me to do?"

"Spread your legs open and pull your knees up. You're so hot like that. Like you're waiting for me to slide my cock into you."

"Oh, God..." I groaned rather more loudly than I intended. I pulled my knees up and spread them apart, moving my hand faster. "I'm so close," I panted, bucking my hips and thrusting myself harder into my hand. I imagined how it had felt that morning when I was in exactly this position with Jacob on top of me, his cock deep inside me, my muscles tight around him as he nudged my prostate with each thrust. I was right on the edge, almost slipping over.

"Me too, baby...almost there..."

I could hear the slick sound of his hand moving rapidly on his cock and wondered if he was using lube. I moaned loudly again and swore under my breath.

"Come for me, Edward," Jacob gasped. "I'm there...coming now..._fuck!"_

I tightened my grip and with a few more fast strokes I came hard, spurting through my fingers onto my stomach and crying out his name. I reached down to the base of my cock and squeezed, drawing my hand up again slowly to tease out the last few drops and then released it, watching it drop onto my belly, beginning to soften slightly, the head smearing a small puddle of cum beneath it. I let my head fall back onto the pillow and breathed out shakily.

"I love you, Edward," Jacob said breathlessly.

"I love you too." I reached for my shorts to clean myself up, glancing at the door and hoping Jasper wasn't in his room right now.

"You like phone sex then?"

"Uh...yes..." Now I did feel my face burning.

"You were my first time."

"Really?" My pounding heart which had begun to slow picked up its pace again.

"Uh huh. I wanted to try it for a while, I was just waiting until I thought you were confident enough to get off on it."

I chuckled. "I think yesterday sorted out any confidence issues I had."

"I love you," Jacob said again. "I love making love with you."

"I lo..."

"Edward!" Mom knocked on the door and I cringed.

"Shit, it's my Mom!" I whispered, leaping off the bed in a panic.

"Your door is locked, right?" Jacob chuckled.

"Yeah. I gotta go. I'll call you later. Love you, bye!" I ended the call quickly and began to drag my pants on. "In the bathroom!" I called out.

"I just brought your laundry up, do you want me to put it away for you?" The door handle began to turn.

"Uh...no, Mom, I'm...uh, changing my clothes, I locked the door!" I stuttered.

"Ok, honey, I'll leave it outside the door for you."

I heaved a huge sigh of relief as I heard her walking away and went to the bathroom to clean up before I dressed properly. As soon as I opened the door to get the laundry, Jasper came out of his room and I just knew he had been in there the whole time. He smirked at me and raised an eyebrow.

"Having fun in there?"

"Fuck off, Jasper, I hear you often enough!" I snapped.

"I didn't hear a thing, I was in Emmett's room until a minute ago. I just figured you were doing something you shouldn't be if you have your door locked this early." He dissolved into muted laughter.

"Damn you," I muttered, but couldn't help a grin. I felt so different than I had even just a week ago. Jacob made me feel different and at last I realised I was happy.

**Jacob's POV**

I pulled myself up off the bed and went to shower, catching sight of myself in the mirror grinning from ear to ear. I loved Edward so much. He made me feel amazing and finally having sex with him blew my mind. It had never been like that for me. I came often enough, with Bella much as I hated to be reminded of it, and with Brady, but there was always something missing. I had it with Edward and I knew that being in love with him was what made it different. It wouldn't have mattered to me if he had wanted to wait another week or a month or however long; whatever we did or didn't do it was awesome being with him.

I closed my eyes and let the hot water cascade over my head, realising that with Edward's mother interrupting our call, we hadn't arranged when we were going to see each other again. I would text him when I got out of the shower and ask if he wanted to come over tonight. He had been gone only a few hours and I wanted to see him, hold him, kiss him...

"Fuck," I muttered. I had forgotten what had happened just a couple of days ago, the last two days with him having made anything else fade into the background. But when he had turned up on Friday night it had been because that photograph had given us the week from hell.

"Bitch!" I spat, beginning to scrub myself vigorously. I wasn't going to just let it go.

Within ten minutes I was dried and dressed and leaving the house. As I drove to Forks I thought about the things she had done to me, the things Edward had told me he had been through with her, my hands clenching tighter and tighter on the steering wheel until my knuckles were white. I hadn't done anything after he came to talk to me and broke down because there hadn't seemed any point. All I had wanted to do was take care of him and help him get better, but now she had tried to come between us and I wasn't going to ignore it.

I pulled up outside her house, noting that her car was in the driveway alone. So Mr Ferrari wasn't around, if she was still seeing him. I went to the door and rang the bell. No answer. I waited a minute or two, fidgeting impatiently and hoping I hadn't had a wasted journey. I rang the bell again and then knocked. Another minute passed and then the door opened. She was wearing some fancy designer dress with her hair all up and diamonds glinting in her ears as if she were getting ready to go somewhere.

"What do you want, Jacob?" she asked warily.

"I wanted to find out what was going through your head when you sent Edward that photograph," I said calmly. "You saw us together a week ago, right?"

"You know I did." She gave me a disgusted look. "I knew you turned gay, but I couldn't really believe it of him. Then again, I suppose it makes sense."

"You're enough to turn any man gay, Bella. What did you think you were going to achieve by emailing him? Break us up? Make him doubt me?"

"The pair of you made me sick, walking around in public holding hands," she said.

I snorted. "That's not why you did it. You can't bear to see him happy, can you? You thought you broke him, treating him like shit, bullying him and then leaving him at the altar. You can't stand that he's happy, with me."

"Is there a point to this?" she sighed, sounding bored.

"I just wanted you to know you failed," I said with a smile. "I love Edward; he loves me; we trust each other. None of your spiteful little games are going to spoil that..."

At this point Mr Ferrari pulled up in the driveway behind Bella's car and he got out quickly and walked over.

"Ok, sweetheart?" he said, stepping past me into the house and standing behind her. "Who's this?"

"Jacob Black, I used to date him a long time ago," she said.

"Not that long ago, Bella," I said, glancing at the guy behind her.

"What are you doing here?" he aimed at me.

"I'm sure Bella will fill you in."

"It's nothing," she snapped, glaring at me.

"Oh, you don't want him finding out you tried to break my relationship up?" I knew I was being childish, but I couldn't help it. An eye for an eye.

"What's he talking about, Bella?"

"Nothing, Andy, he's just being a jerk, as usual."

"Doesn't sound like nothing," the man grunted. "Care to elaborate?" He raised an eyebrow at me and then narrowed his eyes.

"He's a liar, he'll tell you nasty things about me just because he's bitter than I broke up with him."

"I think she doesn't like the fact that I'm dating the guy she left at the altar a few months back," I said.

Both of the man's eyebrows shot up.

"My boy got an email from Bella with a photoshopped picture of me and a girl..." I went on.

"Stop it, Jacob!" Bella hissed. "You're so full of shit."

Andy Ferrari glanced sideways at her and then at me as if he were weighing up which of us was more likely to be telling the truth. I didn't really care to add very much more; I had obviously sewn a seed of doubt already.

"Look, you can ask anyone around here. Most of Forks knows she jilted Edward Cullen. I'm surprised you don't since she started seeing you the same time, or probably before."

"I live in Port Angeles, I don't hear much of what goes on here," he said.

"Well, then all I can say is, watch your back. And your bank account. I'll leave you two to talk."

I left them to it and for about five minutes I grinned and chortled as I drove home, until I looked at myself as someone else might and realised that I had just done exactly the same thing Bella had tried to do to me. It might have had the effect I was going for, but it didn't alter the fact that it was infantile and spiteful and not at all like me. I should have stayed away from her and let her think she might have spoiled things for Edward and me. Who cared?

"You jerk, Jacob," I muttered.

As soon as I arrived home I called Edward. I had intended to just text him and arrange to see him, but I knew I should tell him what I did. His phone rang a couple of times before he answered.

"Jacob!"

"Hey, baby. What are you doing?"

"I'm driving, can I call you back?"

"Sure," I said, disappointed.

"Won't be long. Bye."

He hung up before I could say anything else and I frowned at my phone. A minute later someone knocked on the door and I went to get it, hoping it wasn't one my friends wanting to hang out. I really wanted to talk to Edward.

"Hey, I said I wouldn't be long." Edward's cheeks dimpled as he grinned at me, his green eyes sparkling.

"You were on your way over here?"

"Yes, I followed you back from near our drive, you must have been distracted if you didn't see my car, or hear it." He indicated the Skyline behind him.

"I was distracted, come in." I grabbed is hand and pulled him into the house.

"Where did you go?"

"I did something really stupid," I groaned, slipping my arms around him.

"What was it?"

"I couldn't help myself and now I feel like a jerk."

"What did you do?" Edward repeated, pressing his face into my neck.

"I went to see Bella."

He raised his head again and looked at me. "About the photo?"

"Yeah. I just wanted her to know that whatever she does, she can't hurt us. I guess I wanted to rub her nose in it, how happy we are."

"What did she say?"

"She was pretty pissed. Her new man turned up and heard half of what I had to say. I think he'll be asking a lot of questions about now."

"Shit," Edward said.

"I shouldn't have done it, I know it was childish. The kind of thing you would expect her to do, but not me."

"Yeah, very childish. Kindergarten type behaviour. You broke my favourite toy so I'm going to break yours kind of thing."

"Jesus, Edward," I sighed.

He chuckled, his body shaking as it rested against mine.

"You think it's funny?"

"Yes, it's funny. Who cares if it's childish? She hurt you, she practically wrecked my life, she tried to break us up...the hell with her. I hope her new man ditches her. She can't hurt us any more, that's the only thing that's important."

"Yeah, you're right." I hugged him tighter against me and kissed his neck. "I love you."

"I love you too. So what did you want to talk about?"

"Huh?"

"When you called," he reminded me.

"Oh, I wanted to arrange to see you."

"How about now?"

I grinned. "Sounds like a plan."

I led him into the lounge and we curled up on the sofa together, just holding each other and exchanging soft kisses every so often. Even only doing that had my heart racing and my cock stiffening in my pants.

"How long can you stay?" I murmured.

"I have to get back right after breakfast, I have some work to do."

"Aren't your parents bothered about you staying over?"

"They haven't said anything since my Dad tried to give me 'the talk'. I think they know I'm ok with you."

"Well, I think we should make the most of it then and get an early night," I said. "Ever since that phone call I haven't been able to stop thinking about...getting my hands on you."

"Me too."

"You were so fucking hot, Edward, I could see you in my head, touching yourself." I remembered the way he sounded, his soft moans and gasps coming to me down the phone as he got himself off and my cock strained against my zipper. "Will you do that for me again and let me watch?"

"If you want me to." He straightened up and grinned shyly. "It'll be better with both hands. I was wishing I had a hands free kit."

"Shit," I muttered. "I'll buy you one if you'll keep on doing that with me."

A few minutes later we were in my room, me clad in only my shorts the way I had been when we started talking on the phone and Edward still dressed and lying on my bed, the small lamp on the bed table casting a glow over the room and showing me his pink cheeks and sparkling eyes. The bulge in his pants indicated he was just as eager as I was and I kneeled on the end of the bed by his feet, restraining myself from touching him with difficulty. His hands rested on the mattress either side of him, his fingers twitching slightly in their impatience.

"Where do you want me to start?" he whispered.

"Take your shirt off. Slowly."


	16. Chapter 16

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

**Jacob's POV**

Edward unfastened his shirt one button at a time, taking my request more than literally, pausing half way down the front to undo the cuffs before pulling the bottom of the shirt out of his pants and undoing the last four buttons there. Gradually a narrow strip of his chest and belly appeared and I suppressed a groan as I caught sight of his happy trail disappearing into the waistband of his pants. My cock throbbed impatiently and I palmed it slowly, clenching my other fist to stop myself reaching out and touching that narrow line of light brown hair. I licked my lips as Edward lifted his upper body slightly to slip his arms out of the shirt sleeves, using his abs to hold himself up. His green eyes boldly held mine as he tossed the garment off the side of the bed and lay back down.

"What's next?" he asked.

"Pants...off..." I breathed.

I slipped my hand under the waistband of my shorts and curled my fingers around my cock, needing skin on skin and friction. Edward popped the button free at his waist and lowered the zipper, the flaps of his pants stretching apart as his erection pushed upwards, barely restrained by his shorts.

"Fuck," I muttered and gulped to swallow the saliva which had collected in my mouth. I didn't know how I was going to control myself when he started touching himself.

"Mmm..." He was rubbing the heel of his hand down his length, his eyes sliding closed, neck arching back on the pillow and moaning like he had down the phone. I hadn't been lying when I told him the sound of him could have made me come in my pants. I let go of my cock for a moment and cupped my balls instead, tugging them downwards away from my body in an effort to calm myself down just a little.

Edward wriggled his pants out from under his butt, slid them down his legs and kicked them off. His erection twitched impatiently in his shorts and I could already see dampness spreading around the head, darkening the grey fabric. My own cock throbbed and I felt an identical wet patch on the front of my shorts. I got to my feet, not taking my eyes off Edward, and slid them off quickly, gripping my erection firmly around the base as soon as it was free. It was hot and heavy in my hand and I began a slow stroking motion as I kneeled on the mattress again, asking Edward to slip his hand inside his shorts and touch himself. He worked his fingers under the waistband, gradually moving his hand lower until it was hidden to the wrist. My eyes darted from the movement in his shorts to his face, flushed with arousal, his lower lip caught between his teeth and then back again to his lower body.

"Oh, God...take them off..." I urged. "You're making me so hard." I reached down with my free hand and cupped my balls again, rolling them around and squeezing lightly, longing to begin jerking off in earnest, but at the same time wanting to prolong every sensation.

"Me too," Edward breathed. He slipped his shorts off quickly and immediately his cock was back in his hand and he was pulling his knees up, spreading his legs wide apart so that I could see...everything. His hand slid firmly up and down his shaft and he let out another of those sexy moans that made my cock throb in my hand.

"Shit, Edward, you're gonna make me come," I groaned.

He opened his eyes, the green mostly obscured now by huge black pupils, then closed them again, his cheeks flushing a little more. He continued to jerk himself off slowly, his thumb rubbing over the head and spreading pre-cum down his shaft with each stroke, his lips parted as he moaned and gasped. His hips began to lift off the mattress as he fucked his hand and I mirrored his movements, shoving myself urgently into my fist.

"Do something else for me," I panted. "Get the lube...I want to see you with your fingers inside yourself."

Edward groaned in protest, slowing the movement of his hand and letting his butt sink back onto the bed. "I'm so close."

"Stop for a minute. I am too, but I don't want to come yet."

Taking deep breaths, I stilled my hand and watched as he grabbed the bottle of lemon-scented lube and squirted some onto his fingers. His thighs were quivering, his chest and belly rising and falling rapidly as he breathed and I bit my lip as he carefully inserted one slick finger into his tight hole, pausing at the first knuckle and then pushing it deeper, as far as he could reach. He withdrew it almost to the tip and then pushed it back in, another louder moan leaving him as he resumed jerking off, more slowly this time, keeping the same rhythm with hand and finger and then gradually working a second finger inside himself. It was the hottest thing I'd ever seen in my life and I began to tip over the edge as I watched him fucking himself.

"Oh fuck, I'm coming!" I cried as my orgasm suddenly crashed through me, thick strings of white fluid shooting onto the bed between Edward's feet and then the remainder coating my hand. I looked up at Edward's face and noticed his eyes partially open, staring at my cock and I stroked myself through the intense pleasure, squeezing the last few drops of fluid out before I released it and wiped my hand on the sheet. Watching me come brought Edward to the finish and he arched up off the bed, spurting through his hand onto his chest, his fingers still thrusting deep inside himself, only withdrawing as his body sank languidly back onto the mattress and his cock fell from his hand.

I grabbed my shorts to wipe my cock clean and mop up the mess on the sheet as best I could. Then I picked up Edward's shorts and cleaned him up while he lay there panting and trembling, his legs still spread open and pulled up as if he were waiting for me to fuck him. I kneeled between them and edged closer, leaning forward over him and resting my hands either side of his head. I was breathless, my heart racing, still half hard and knowing it wouldn't take much before I was ready again.

"Baby, you're so fucking sexy," I murmured. "So beautiful." I brushed my lips against his. "I love you, Edward."

"I love you too." His eyes opened slowly and he slid his arms around me, pulling my weight down onto him. "You make me feel amazing; not only like this, but in every way - like I'm worth something."

"You are," I told him. "And you're everything to me."

I captured his lips with mine, my breathing finally slow enough to kiss him properly without having to stop after a few seconds. Our lips caressed, tongues toying with each other lazily, Edward's hands running lightly up and down my back, his cock which had only half softened, beginning to twitch again between our stomachs. Immediately my own began to come back to life and I gyrated my hips, rubbing myself against him as we kissed until both of us were hard, pulsing, eager as before. I drew my lips away from his reluctantly and pulled myself up, sitting back on my heels while I reached out to the top drawer in the bed table for a condom, swiftly rolled it onto myself and coated myself in lube. Edward's eyes watched my hands as I prepared myself, then applied a little more lube to my fingers and slid two into him, then gradually a third, making sure he was ready for me. When I withdrew my fingers and leaned forward, guiding the head of my cock into him and then lowering myself slowly as I slid deeper, he closed his eyes and slid his arms around me again.

"Edward," I whispered. "Keep your eyes open. Look at me."

He lifted his eyelids shyly, a blush colouring his cheeks again as he met my eyes. He looked so sexy with his green eyes dark with lust as the pupils rapidly widened again, his cheeks pink, copper hair sticking out all over his head, lips swollen from my kisses. I felt my cock pulse inside him and he thrust himself up against me, encouraging me to move. I began to fuck him, slowly at first and then harder and faster, withdrawing further each time and slamming back in to him, my eyes locked onto his the whole time, my fingertips brushing his cheek on the couple of occasions where he began to close his eyes again. After a few minutes I propped myself up further, giving him room to slide a hand between us and jerk off while I began to move my hips in a circular motion, making Edward moan and whimper. His hand moved in time with our bodies until both of us neared the end and then our movements became erratic and awkward, Edward's muscles clenching around me as he began to come, dragging my orgasm out of me with a desperate groan.

He slid his hand out from between us and held me with both arms again, pulling me down against him. I felt the wet stickiness on his belly, our chests and limbs slipping against each other, slick with sweat, my cock still inside him as it began to soften. I reached down reluctantly, letting myself slip out of him and grabbing the condom so I didn't lose it in him. Rolling onto my side I brought him with me and we lay there a few more minutes, holding each other as our heartbeats slowed and our bodies cooled, then rose slowly and headed for the shower.

I slept like the dead that night, exhausted and lulled by the sound of Edward's steady breathing, the slow thump of his heart under my hand as I held him, my body spooned up against his. When I opened my eyes it was just before seven and I drew away from him quietly, leaving him to sleep a few more minutes while I made coffee. I returned to the bedroom and placed the mugs on the bed table, then woke him by blowing in his ear and nibbling the lobe.

We drank the coffee, quickly made toast for breakfast and then Edward left at seven forty-five after several minutes of cuddling and kissing on the door step. I hated to let him go and I couldn't resist sending him a text immediately after he left.

'I miss you already, I love you. Jx.'

'I miss you too. Call you when I finish working. Love you. Ex.' I received the reply ten minutes later and guessed he had just arrived home. Shoving my phone into my pocket, I left the house and went over to the garage to join Seth and get some work done.

The whole week was pretty busy. I had some big jobs on in the garage and Edward was working on some website for a company in Forks. We didn't see each other again until Thursday, but now we had tried phone sex once, we kept on doing it. He would text me when he was done working, which could be as late as nine or ten o'clock and then I would get comfortable and call him, by which time I knew he would be locked in his room, hard with anticipation. He even confessed to having stolen some of Jasper's lube and drove me crazy by finger-fucking himself and moaning that he was imagining it was my cock inside him.

Thursday we promised each other to finish work on time and by six-thirty I was home, showered and in the process of cooking pasta when Edward let himself in and greeted me with kisses on the back of my neck and hands slipping under my t-shirt to stroke my abs as I stood stirring the Carbonara. We both ate dinner with hard-ons and fell into bed immediately afterwards. This time there was no long drawn out teasing and taking our time. We stripped or clothes off and I pounced on Edward, plundering his mouth with my tongue and then working my way hastily down to his cock, gripping his hips and encouraging him to fuck my mouth before I fucked him. Afterwards we lay in each other's arms, idly stroking each other's skin and talking until we were ready again, then making love more gently and eventually falling asleep together.

Friday went by pretty quickly and Edward arrived in the late evening with an overnight bag with the intention of staying until Sunday night. I still had one job I needed to finish Saturday morning, but he was happy to spend three or four hours alone in the house until I returned. In the afternoon we went to the movies and then to a restaurant for dinner and Sunday we did mundane things like taking a trip to the supermarket to stock my freezer, which somehow ended up being fun with Edward, whereas on my own I would have been impatient, thinking of something more important I could have used the time for.

We took the frozen goods and groceries back to the house and put them away, then went out in the Skyline for a drive. We headed south towards Clearwater and raced around the more deserted roads where we would be unlikely to be pulled over by the cops. After parking up and spend an hour fooling around in the backseat exchanging blowjobs, we headed back to Forks for a very late lunch. I was driving and I headed for the lot I usually used when I went into town for anything. I eased the car into a vacant space and after locking it, I tossed the keys to Edward and then both of us halted at the sound of raised voices.

"You fucking dirty little tramp! You think you can just sleep around with anyone that takes your fancy and that when I find out I'll overlook it? It was pretty fucking clear that guy in the store knows you as more than a friend. And do you really think you can pin whoever's kid that is on me after this? Go to hell, Bella!"

"What the hell?" Edward muttered, turning around. Maybe fifty feet away was Bella's guy, Andy, with his Ferrari, his face furious as he yelled at her. She was dressed in some ridiculous fancy outfit with impossibly high heels and appeared to be in tears - crocodile tears no doubt.

"But, Andy, please, it was one little mistake, I promise..." she begged and I snorted quietly.

"Looks like her guy got suspicious after my visit; seems like he was right to be."

"Bullshit! I doubt you've ever been faithful to anyone, have you? I know this isn't my hometown, but I've been asking around since last week; hearing more about how you jilted that kid right after you met me! I wasn't sure I believed it at the time, but leaving the guy at the altar? Who the fuck does that, Bella? Did you see the car and guess I had more money than him? I fucking hope he's happy as Larry and gloating that he had a lucky escape, which is exactly what I'm gonna be doing tonight!"

"Andy, stop! Please, I'm sorry!" Bella cried, grabbing at his jacket.

"Get the hell off of me!" He shoved her roughly away from him and her hip bumped against another car parked close by. She staggered and tripped in her heels, falling hard onto her butt. She sat there on the damp ground, sobbing and beating her fists on the concrete, shouting up at Andy that she loved him and didn't want to lose him.

"You don't know the meaning of the word! Try it on one of the other poor suckers you're spreading your legs for!" He flung open the door of the Ferrari and threw himself into the seat. In a second the engine was roaring and he shot backwards out of his parking space, slammed the car into gear and screeched out of the lot.

"The guy has some sense," I muttered.

"Jacob." Edward glanced at me with a frown. "We can't leave her there like that. What if she's hurt?"

"You cannot be serious." I looked at him in disbelief. "You want to help her after everything she did to you? Both of us?"

"I don't _want_ to, but it's the right thing to do." He took a step towards Bella and I caught his hand, halting him.

"Baby, let's just get out of here, ok? I am not letting her get her claws into you and give you another kick in the teeth."

He turned towards me. "That's not going to happen. She can't touch me now. But I'm not going to walk away and leave a woman in trouble." He pulled his hand free from mine and strode over to her.

"You have to be fucking kidding me," I growled under my breath.

"Edward! Oh, Edward!" Bella was wailing. "Please, you have to help me. I'm pregnant. I'm scared I might lose it."

"Jesus," I muttered. "This isn't happening." I shoved my hands into my pockets and stood seething as Edward helped the bitch who had practically destroyed him to her feet and led her over to the car.

"Thank you so much," she was sniffling. "I'm so sorry, Edward. I know everything I did was unforgiveable. I know I don't deserve this, but I'm really grateful."

"Too right you don't fucking deserve it," I hissed, hoping she could hear me. Whether she did, I wasn't sure because she didn't look at me, but Edward heard. He glanced at me with a slight frown and shake of his head, then unlocked the car and helped Bella into the passenger seat.

"What the hell are you doing?" I demanded.

"I'm taking her to the hospital." He closed the door. "You'll have to ride in the back for a few minutes."

"Edward, what the fuck are you thinking?" I grabbed him now and pinned him against the rear of the car. "I don't get it."

"Please, just trust me. I know what I'm doing. I love you and I know you hate her. I do too, but if I walk away leaving her lying in the street, I'm just going to feel guilty."

"You're too nice," I sighed. "I hope your Dad's not on duty, he'll blow a gasket."

"He's at home," Edward said. "Let's go."

"Fine." I squeezed into the back of the car and sat there resigned as Edward drove to the hospital. I wanted nothing more than to drag Bella out of the car and dump her in the gutter where she belonged. The whole episode had disaster written all over it and as each minute passed, I only became more heated and anxious to protect Edward from anything she might decide to do to him. Currently she was sniffling and moaning in pain, if that were even real, thanking him over and over again and saying she didn't deserve him helping her. No kidding.

When we reached the hospital, he helped her out of the car and actually picked her up when her legs buckled. I followed them into the ER, clenching my fists at my sides. Never mind Carlisle blowing a gasket - I was about ready to and only the idea of making a scene in front of Edward's father's colleagues and Edward himself held me together. A nurse appeared with a wheelchair and Edward put Bella in it and then went to give her name and date of birth at the desk and describe what happened. When he finished, she grabbed at his hand.

"You will stay while they see me, won't you, Edward? Please, I'm scared."

I ground my teeth together and glowered, tempted to grab him and drag him out of the damned place if he insisted on pandering to her shit a minute longer. I was beyond certain that she would find some way to hurt him again, but what he said next made me realise that I underestimated him. He was so much stronger than he had been even a week or two ago and he didn't need me to protect him like he was helpless. He pulled his hand free and shoved it into his pocket.

"Take your hand off me, Bella, and listen to me. I don't want to hear your apologies or your lies. All I have to say is that you did both Jacob and me a favour. If you hadn't behaved like the little bitch you are, we wouldn't be together now. I love him and he loves me."

"But...but...you helped me!" Bella cried. "Don't you feel anything for me, Edward?"

"Pity perhaps. I helped you the same way I'd help anyone I came upon in the street who needed it. I wouldn't leave you there hurt because I'd feel guilty, just as I would feel guilty if I saw an animal hit by a car and didn't stop to take it to the veterinarian. I'm a better person than you could ever hope to be and I hope one day you realise that and stop using people and treating them like dirt."

He moved to my side then and slid his hand into mine. Bella's mouth dropped open in disbelief and she sent me a venomous look.

"I take it Jacob's responsible for turning you into such a hard, heartless person."

Edward just smiled. "If I am, that was your doing. Jacob just showed me love. Let's go, babe." He began to stride towards the exit, tugging me along with him while Bella screeched impotently after us. I was stunned and filled with admiration.

"You were amazing," I said, grinning at him as we stepped out into the parking lot. "You handled that a whole lot better than I would have."

"Didn't think I had it in me, did you?" he said, squeezing my hand.

"I suppose I didn't expect the need would arise." I let go of his hand and slid my arm around him instead, pressing my lips to his cheek, unconcerned by the mixture of wide-eyed stares and frowns from the number of people heading to and from the hospital. "I love you," I said. "More than you could ever know."

"I love you too," he said. "You know me being like this is all down to you. I feel like nobody can hurt me again; especially not Bella. You made me see myself differently."

I pulled him against me as we reached the car and gave him a warm kiss on the lips, longing to deepen it, but aware that we were only drawing more attention to ourselves. I let him go again reluctantly and we got into the car.

"I can't wait to get you home," I smiled.

"We're going out for a meal first, aren't we?" Edward smirked. "You're going to have to wait. I'm hungry." He licked his lower lip and shifted the car into gear.

"Damn you," I muttered. "I'm going to end up sitting through the whole meal with a hard-on."

"And it'll feel so much better when I suck on it for dessert if you've been longing for it."

"Fuck," I muttered. "There is such a thing as being over-confident, you know." I adjusted myself, already half erect and Edward just laughed and drove back to the parking lot in town.

We chose an Italian restaurant which was open all day and ordered a main only. Sitting at a corner table, the rest of the place almost empty, Edward proceeded to torment me by stroking my thigh and licking his lips and my cock strained against my zipper, aching for release. I pushed his hand off of me twice and tried to ignore him, but it was impossible.

"Two can play at this game," I whispered as the food arrived. As soon as the waiter walked away I pressed my mouth to his ear. "Want to know where I'm thinking about putting my tongue right now?"

"Stop it," Edward hissed.

"Something else we haven't tried yet. I want to see you on your hands and knees in the middle of my bed..."

"Damnit, Jacob," he groaned.

"...and I'll see how wet I can get you with my tongue before I use the lube..."

"Alright, stop! No more teasing, I promise." He picked up his fork with a shaky hand.

"Spoilsport, I was just getting started."

I grinned at him and drew back, but my own efforts to torment him had only aroused me even more and I couldn't get the imagine of him naked on hands and knees out of my head. I struggled to eat my meal and it was clear he was in the same dilemma. We refused coffee, Edward paid for the meal in cash and we left quickly, trying to look casual with our hands in our pockets as we hurried back to the car. I was extremely uncomfortable by the time I sat down and I unfastened my pants to relieve the pressure the zipper was putting on my erection. Edward groaned and determinedly kept his eyes on the road as he drove back to the house and when we arrived, I fumbled with the keys, eventually throwing the door open so that it crashed against the wall.

"Come here," I gasped, unable to wait a minute longer as Edward stepped into the hallway. I kicked the door closed and pushed him against the wall, pressing myself against him as my lips crashed onto his in a searing kiss and he moaned into my mouth, the same throaty, sexy sound that he tormented me with down the phone. I slid my hands between us and unfastened his pants, pulling his hard cock out of his shorts quickly and gripping it firmly. In a second his hand was on me and we clung to each other, frantically jerking each other off until we came together, spurting onto hands and clothes, panting and laughing. Eventually we parted and headed for my room, quickly shedding stained clothing and falling onto the bed where we rested for a while, whispering teasingly to each other until both of us were ready for more.

* * *

**Finally, a shout-out to some great writers - go check out their work if you haven't already:- elfprincess8, ant1gon3, Lineia, Soundshield11 **


	17. Chapter 17

**Thank you to everyone for reading, reviewing, etc, I'm always happy to know you're enjoying the story :o)**

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

**Edward's POV**

It didn't take me very long to recover - it never did when Jacob was close to me, naked, and I could hear the words he had whispered in the restaurant echoing in my head. 'I want to see you on your hands and knees in the middle of the bed...and I'll see how wet I can get you with my tongue before I use the lube..."

My cock went from being half soft to rigid in a few more seconds and I moaned before I could stop myself. Jacob's eyes opened slowly and met mine.

"Starting without me?"

"I was just thinking..."

"I'd love to know what you're thinking that made you moan like that." He moved a little, closing the small gap between us and sliding his arms around me. His erection bumped against mine and I let out a small gasp. "Come on, tell me..."

"I was thinking about what you said in the restaurant."

"What did I say?" he teased.

"You know..." Damnit, I could feel my cheeks heating up and I let my eyes slide away from his. Why did I still have to fucking blush, even now?

"Hell, I said a lot of things," Jacob frowned. "Was it...can we get the check, please?"

"Jerk," I muttered.

"Well, I did say that," he smirked. "Or was it something else? I said 'no, thanks' when they offered us coffee."

"You know what I mean," I said, knowing full well he was going to make me repeat it. "You said...you would see how wet you could get me...with your tongue..."

"Did I? Hell, I don't remember that," he chuckled. "But it sounds like a good idea."

"You made me say that on purpose."

"Yeah, because you're so cute when you blush, it turns me on." He brushed his lips against mine and then pulled away from me and sat up. "Come here, get up. You remember what else I said? Hands and knees."

I rolled over and kneeled in the middle of the bed, my hands resting on the mattress by the pillows. Jacob placed a hand on my neck and then stroked his fingertips lightly down the middle of my back, making goosebumps break out all over my skin. He caressed my butt briefly, sliding his fingers down my crack and then on down one thigh to my knee. I shivered and bit my lip, resisting the urge to touch myself with difficulty. My cock was quivering against my stomach, aching for attention and I hung my head, looking back at my swollen shaft and silently begging Jacob to touch it, but he clearly had no intention of doing that, at least not right away. He moved behind me and slid both hands between my thighs, urging me to part them. I shifted my knees a few inches, feeling strangely more exposed in this position than on my back and my face continued to burn.

"Spread them wider," Jacob murmured. "You look so hot like this."

I did as he asked until my thighs were wide apart, the lower parts of my legs resting either side of him and I closed my eyes, telling myself to stop being embarrassed and enjoy. Jacob's hands rested lightly on my cheeks, squeezing the flesh a little and then stroking and cupping them, the thumbs pulling them further apart. I felt warm breath blowing onto my hole and shuddered, clenching the muscle involuntarily and groaning.

"Babe, relax." Jacob's breath fanned me again as he spoke and then I felt the tip of his tongue touch me; hot and wet, stroking over the tight puckered flesh back there.

"Oh, fuck," I muttered. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, letting myself loosen up and sliding my arms forward, resting my forehead on the bed.

"That's better." His tongue touched me again, exploring the sensitive area between my balls and my hole, circling slowly upwards while I gasped and shivered, my cock straining against my belly, desperate for some friction.

"Please..." I heard myself moan.

He flattened his tongue against me, swiping it slowly up and down over my hole, his hands still holding my butt firmly with the cheeks spread apart while I whimpered and shivered, resisting the urge to push myself back against his face with difficulty. After what seemed like an endless period of torment, he stopped and I felt the moist tip of his tongue push against me and enter just a little.

"Oh, God...Jacob...please...fuck...don't...Jesus..." I babbled.

I felt as if I might come without him even touching my cock, but I was aching for more; I could barely stand it. He didn't answer, the tip of his tongue flicking in and out of me, his hands moving now so that one continued to hold me open while the other cupped my balls, caressing and tugging on them gently.

"Stop!" I gasped. "Please...I need...uh..."

"Mmm?" he prompted, withdrawing his tongue and sweeping it lower again. He released my balls and slid his arm around me, grasping my cock lightly while he moved his head away and pushed the tip of one finger into me. I thrust myself eagerly against his palm, needing friction, but he was holding me too loosely to gain any.

"Please...fuck me," I gasped. "I want...I need...your cock in me." Any inhibitions I might have had over feeling so exposed in front of him had completely vanished and I was desperate to feel his length pushing inside me, filling me. "Oh, God...now...please..." I begged.

"You are such a turn on, begging like that," he purred, taking his hands off and reaching for the lube and a condom. I squeezed my eyes shut and breathed deep, trying to slow things down. As it was I would probably explode the second he thrust into me. I heard the condom wrapper tear and the wet sound of lube. Then two slick fingers pushed into me slowly, preparing me agonisingly slowly.

"Uh...that's enough...please..."

Much to my relief he removed his fingers and moved closer to me and then I felt the blunt head of his cock push against me. I breathed out slowly as it slid in a little way and then stopped. Then he was moving again, pushing deeper until his hips were flush against me and his cock was buried deep.

"Is this what you want?" he asked huskily.

"God, yes."

"I won't last long."

"Probably longer than me." I shuddered and clenched my muscles around him.

"Fuck! I doubt that." He began to move, his hands gripping my hips, pulling back and then thrusting forwards slowly at first and then harder and faster. "Touch yourself," he panted.

I didn't need telling twice. With one arm and my head resting on the bed and Jacob's hands holding me tightly, my knees wide apart I was well balanced and I reached back with my free hand, wrapping it around my throbbing erection. The head was wet with pre-cum and I smeared it around, slicking the shaft before I started to pump it in earnest, keeping time with Jacob's hard thrusts into me. My orgasm was already approaching fast and my balls tightened, the base of my cock swelling.

"Oh, God...I'm gonna...come..." I gasped.

"Hold on...stay with me...few more seconds..." He slammed himself into me harder, his weight and the force of his movement pushing me forwards until my hand touched the wall. I braced myself against it and breathed deep, slowing my hand movement until Jacob's thrusting became more erratic, deep groans issuing from him. "Now...let go...come for me..." he urged.

I came immediately as if he had flicked a switch. My cock jerked repeatedly in my hand, spilling streams of hot cum over my fingers and onto the bed and my muscles clenched around Jacob, pulling his orgasm from him until he was pulsing inside me, filling the condom, his hands releasing my hips and arms sliding around me as he collapsed slowly onto my back.

"Fucking Christ, Edward," he breathed.

I was incapable of saying anything, my lungs straining to suck in oxygen, my body trembling from my orgasm and under the weight of his. After a moment he slowly pulled out of me and I collapsed onto the mattress, turning onto my side, my chest heaving with the effort. Jacob disposed of the condom and then stretched out next to me, grasping one of my hands in his.

"Are you ok?" he murmured.

"More than ok..."

"I was rough."

"You didn't hurt me. That was amazing." I forced my eyes open and looked at him, his russet skin glistening with sweat, chest rising and falling rapidly, long dark lashes resting on his cheeks. I edged closer and touched my lips to his jaw, tasting salt. "I love you."

"I love you too, baby." His eyes opened slowly and he turned his head towards me.

"I want more," I said.

"More?" he chuckled. "You're gonna have to give me ten minutes."

"No, I didn't mean that, I meant..." Shit, I hadn't really meant to say anything. What I wanted to say was that I wanted to be with him more; I wanted him with me every minute; I didn't want to have to keep going home to my family when I could be here with him instead.

"What, Edward? Tell me."

"I just meant I wish we could be together more. I hate sleeping alone; I miss you too much," I confessed.

"I want that too. It's ridiculously early days, but I've been thinking about it for a while. I just thought maybe I'd freak you out or something," he said. "I thought we should take our time, but I don't really want to."

"What do you want?" I held my breath. What had he been thinking? Could I dare to hope it was what had crossed my mind a thousand times and been dismissed as too soon, too intense, something he wouldn't want to do?

"I want us to live together. If it's what you want. You can say no. Shit..." he babbled. "It's too soon, isn't it?"

I grinned. "No, it's not too soon; not for me anyway. I don't care what anybody else thinks." My heart, which had just begun to slow its gallop, started to race again.

"What about your parents?"

"They'll worry that I'm rushing things when I hardly know you, but I don't feel like we're rushing. I've been thinking about it; how much I want to wake up with you every day..."

"You're sure? You want to live with me?" His hand touched my face and he stared hopefully into my eyes. I still couldn't believe he wanted me this much; that he wanted me with him every minute possible.

"Yes, I'm sure."

"We better talk to your family then," he smiled. "Give your Dad and your brothers chance to kick my butt or threaten me with what they'll do if I let you down."

"They wouldn't do that."

"No? Emmett and Jasper are like guard dogs."

"Can we do it after next weekend?" I asked. "It's my birthday; I know they're planning something, I don't want to spoil it for them, much as I hate birthdays." I could still remember that last awful party as if it were yesterday. Mercifully I had been too sick with some virus the following year and they hadn't bothered.

"Oh, my God, your twenty-first!" Jacob gasped. "Why did you never tell me when your birthday is?"

"I'm telling you now."

"Well, you haven't left me much time to look for a gift," he grumbled.

"You don't have to worry about that," I protested. "I've got the best gift I could hope for right here."

"Now that's just corny," Jacob grinned. "And much as I love being your favourite gift, you're gonna get a proper one. Are they having a party for you?"

"Yes. I hate parties, but it's tradition in my family."

"You won't hate this one, because I'll be there," he reminded me. "And after it's over, we can talk about moving in together. I'll put the house on the market and..."

"Wait, you can't sell your house!" I protested. "Don't you just want me to move in here? Or do you think your Dad wouldn't have liked it?"

"He'd have loved seeing me happy," Jacob said. "But it's not that big and you're used to..."

"It's plenty big enough. I don't want you to sell your house. Anyway, why would you want to move somewhere else when you can step out the front door and be at your work place? That's nuts, Jacob. This is a great house. I don't want something big and fancy, I'm not a spoiled rich kid. Well, I am, I guess..." I grimaced. "...but I mean I don't want or expect all that shit, I just want to be with you, that's all."

"I can't wait." Jacob pulled me closer again and crushed me in a hug. "Move in any time you like; the sooner the better. How about the day after your birthday?"

"How about the following weekend?" I suggested. "Then my parents will have a few days to protest and get used to the idea."

"Ok." He nibbled my neck. "Just let me know when you're ready and I'll be at your door with my truck for your stuff."

"I don't have much," I said, remembering when I had moved in with Bella. My boxes had fitted in one car, but I had left half of my things behind.

"Edward, your room is crammed full of things." Jacob pulled back and met my eyes, frowning.

"Yes, but I don't want to clutter your place up with my...junk."

"That's crazy. If you're going to move in with me, that makes this your house just as much as mine, even if your name isn't on the deeds. I want all of you here - your clothes in my wardrobe, your toiletries in my bathroom, your books and music on some of the shelves, your pictures wherever you want to put them. We'll figure out where to put your computers and stuff so you have a place to work, maybe in my sisters' old room where the piano is. Shit." His brow wrinkled more. "Bella didn't let you take half of your things to her place, did she?"

"No."

"Well, it's not going to be like that this time. I want every little thing of yours here with you, even if it's stuff going back years that means nothing to anybody except you. I love you, Edward, therefore I love all your junk too."

I was pretty overwhelmed by the whole idea of moving in together and by what he said, and I was filled with excitement at the idea, wishing that the next two weeks were already passed and I was in my room packing everything up ready to move. But still I had to get through the dreaded birthday party.

My birthday was actually on Saturday and Mom asked me to invite any friends I wanted to attend. Rosalie was coming of course and Jasper had a few friends he planned to ask. I didn't really have any friends of my own any more, although I knew some of Jacob's friends a little bit. We asked Embry and Seth and also Jacob's ex, Brady and his boyfriend, Paul. I didn't feel uncomfortable about Brady at all, he seemed nice enough and I had a surprising amount in common with him. However, it turned out that he had broken up with Paul and had plans to go visiting with his parents that weekend.

Jacob hadn't even been aware Brady and Paul had split until he called Brady to ask him to the party. Brady had explained that as much as he had been infatuated with Paul at the beginning, he had realised pretty quickly that he wasn't really ready for another relationship and wanted the chance to have a few casual dates and just have fun. They were still friends and Paul was cool with the situation, although he was ready for a relationship and planned on looking for someone new.

"What's he like?" I asked Jacob, an idea springing to mind. Jasper would probably kick my butt if he knew what I was doing, but I thought it was worth a try. He hadn't seen any more of Danny and hadn't even been out for a week. He was determined to stop sleeping around and try to find someone to date, but didn't really know where to look.

"What's who like?" Jacob asked.

"Paul."

"Aren't I enough for you?" he teased.

"No, I need more," I said, tongue in cheek and then laughed at his shocked expression. "No, I just wondered if he would like my brother."

"Somehow I don't think Emmett would be Paul's type and Rose would have plenty to say."

"Jasper!" I exclaimed.

"I know. Into match-making, are you?" Jacob quirked an eyebrow.

"Not really, but I hate seeing Jasper lonely, and he is. He's always been a bit quick to...rush into things and he ends up being made use of and never getting what he really wants. He'd hate me trying to set him up with someone, but if Paul's an ok guy we could still ask him to the party and see if they like each other."

Jacob blew his breath out slowly. "Well...he used to be a real jerk, but he had good reason; violent anti-gay father being the worst of it. He used to live around here years ago and then left, but he came back quite recently. He seems ok, he doesn't cause trouble any more, he has a good job and from what Brady said he doesn't want to fuck around, but would rather have somebody to be with."

"Do you think he would come to the party?"

"I don't know, maybe. He hangs out with Embry sometimes so they might come together. I'll speak to him," Jacob promised.

Friday night I stayed over with Jacob as usual. He cooked dinner for me and we attempted to watch a movie, quickly forgetting about it as we exchanged a few kisses and found ourselves unable to keep our hands off of each other as usual. We headed to Jacob's room and made love long into the night until exhaustion forced us to stop and sleep. I drifted off with Jacob moulded to my back, his arms wrapped tightly around me as if he wanted to make sure I wouldn't sneak away during the night. I loved going to sleep with him holding me like that; I felt safe and loved.

When I woke Saturday morning I was disappointed to find I was alone. I had expected to still be in Jacob's arms, but he was gone and the bed beside me was cool, indicating he had been gone more than a few minutes. I heard sounds coming from the kitchen and took the opportunity to use the bathroom, assuming he was making coffee. I considered grabbing some clothes, or at least a towel and going to join him, but then thought better of it and dived back into bed.

Jacob appeared five minutes later, carrying a large tray on which sat two plates of bacon and cheese toasted sandwiches, mugs of coffee and an interesting looking parcel wrapped in shiny red paper. It was a cube-shaped box measuring around three or four inches and I was intrigued, wondering what he could have got for me. It was the one birthday present I had actually been looking forward to.

Jacob set the tray on my lap and sat down beside me. He hadn't bothered to put any clothes on and now he took one of the plates and mugs and put them on the bed table before he cupped my face in his hands and gave me a warm kiss.

"Happy birthday, baby."

"Mmm, thank you," I sighed as he drew back. "Breakfast in bed? I am spoiled."

"Don't expect it every day," he grinned. "Eat up before it gets cold."

"Can't I open the present first?" I eyed it eagerly.

"Nope! You can wait until after you eat."

"Spoilsport." I picked up one of the sandwiches and bit into it.

"I thought you didn't like birthdays anyway and here you are all excited like a kid to see what I got you," Jacob teased.

"I didn't mean I don't like birthdays as such. I just always hated my family's parties, especially those they threw for me," I said. "Anyway, I won't mind it this year, you'll be there." I didn't mind it, I realised. I had always loathed being the centre of attention, but I had never had much confidence in myself, even before Bella.

I finished the breakfast and coffee and Jacob snatched the tray out of my way and placed the parcel on my lap.

"Hope you like it," he said, for once looking slightly less confident himself.

"Of course I'll like it, you got it for me." I peeled the paper off and inside found a Hugo Boss wristwatch box.

"I know you already have one, but this one's special...I hope," Jacob said sheepishly.

I opened the box and found exactly what I would have chosen myself inside - an understated watch with a black face, silver roman numerals and a stainless steel strap. My current watch was Tag Heuer, big and chunky, attention-drawing and with a dozen functions and dials that I would never use. My parents had bought it for my eighteenth, thinking I would appreciate the label although I was never keen on the design.

"Say something," prompted Jacob anxiously.

"It's perfect," I grinned, removing it from the box. "This is me. You know me too well. I love it, thank you."

"Turn it over."

The back of the watch was engraved with a small message - 'My heart is yours; Jacob.' I swallowed the lump in my throat with difficulty and slid the watch onto my wrist, then turned into his arms.

"I love it. I love you. Thank you." I kept it on while we made love, but remembered to take it off before we got in the shower afterwards.

We headed over to my house just before lunch and I found a heap of gifts waiting for me on the dining table. Mom brought out some lunch first and then I opened the parcels; an assortment of music and movies, an iPad, a new printer and scanner to replace the one I had been complaining about for the past few months and my parents had bought me a new set of wheels for the Skyline - the very set I had been drooling over online since I bought the car, but had never mentioned. It turned out that Jasper had snooped through my bookmarks and told Dad what I had been looking at. They didn't have tyres on yet, but Jacob promised to sort that out for me and then change the wheels over.

So far, the day was turning out to be amazing. I just had the party to get through and I wasn't even worried about that any more. People had been asked to arrive around eight o'clock and until then I hung out with Jacob and Jasper, listening to some of my new music and gossiping. Jasper was still moaning about not having a man and Jacob winked at me when he wasn't looking. Paul had agreed to come along to the party although he had been a bit surprised to be asked since he had never been close with Jacob.

They started arriving just before eight - a friend of Rosalie and her boyfriend, then Embry, Seth and Paul with Embry's girlfriend and then Jasper's friends, some of them bringing more gifts - mostly vouchers for music and book stores which I could always make good use of. Emmett put some music on in the main lounge and everybody began helping themselves from the food buffet Mom and Rosalie had laid out and working their way through the generous supply of beer and wine.

"Ed," Jasper said in my ear some time later. "Who's the guy talking to Seth? Are they dating?"

"Huh, no," I snorted. "That's Paul Lahote. He used to date Jacob's ex, Brady, but they split recently."

"He doesn't look like he's particularly heartbroken."

"They weren't together that long," I told him. "Didn't have much chance to get serious. Brady realised he wasn't ready for another relationship; I don't think that's the case for Paul though."

"So he's looking for somebody then?" Jasper raised his eyebrows, seeming interested.

"Jas, you are _not _going to hook up at my party," I said, hoping I was convincing.

"No...but maybe I can get his number or something."

"I suppose you could get Jacob to introduce you," I shrugged. "Or Seth; you know him well enough."

"I don't know, I'm probably not his type," sighed Jasper.

He didn't mention Paul again and when Jacob appeared at my side, I forgot about it. I didn't pay any attention to what Jasper might be doing for some time, but later on I spotted him talking to Paul and Seth. I studied Paul for a moment, but couldn't tell if he was showing any interest in Jasper. He had one hand stuck in his pocket and the other wrapped around a bottle of beer, talking and laughing, but standing closer to Seth than Jasper. However, Seth moved away a few minutes later and went to get more food, leaving Paul and Jasper alone. I watched curiously as they edged closer together and fidgeted, one or the other occasionally saying something, Jasper chewing his lip and grinning nervously. They seemed really awkward and to me it didn't look promising. Then again, I had been awkward and nervous not too long ago. Maybe they were just uncomfortable because they liked each other.

All in all, I enjoyed the evening. Dad embarrassed hell out of me by turning the music off and demanding everyone's attention while he gave a speech and said how proud he and Mom were of me and made everybody raise their glasses and shout, 'Happy birthday, Edward.' My face flamed as usual, but I just laughed and said thanks, rather than storm off to my room and hide at the first opportunity like I always had before.

Eventually everyone began to leave and I saw them off at the door, thanking them all for coming. Jacob left me to it and went to help clear up the buffet. Much to my surprise, Paul hovered after Embry and Seth had gone out.

"Hey, Edward...I wanted to ask you something."

"Sure, what is it?"

"Your brother...um..."

"I wouldn't have you down for shy," I blurted. "Do you like him?" It wasn't like me - not at all - but I knew I'd had too much wine by then and I was picturing Jasper chewing his lip nervously and sighing over Paul probably not being his type.

"Yeah, I didn't really get to talk to him much though."

"Did you get his number?"

"No."

"Well, give me your number," I said. "I'll pass it on to him."

"You got a phone?"

"No, what would I want with a phone?" Definitely too much wine, I thought, as I heard myself snigger. I pulled my phone out and passed it to Paul so he could put himself in my contacts. I knew I could have just asked Jacob for the number, but Jasper wouldn't be impressed if he thought it hadn't actually come from Paul. I took the phone back and Paul walked off to join the others as they piled into Embry's girlfriend's car. I sent Jasper a text then, attaching Paul's number to it and watched with amusement as he opened up the message a minute later and beamed. Whether they would actually get along was anybody's guess, but at least they liked each other, which was a start.

With everyone gone, Dad invited Jacob to stay over with me, since he had drunk too much to drive and would have to either get a cab or have Mom drive him home and I was delighted to have him spend the night in my room for the first time, although I knew we wouldn't be able to do much with Jasper on the other side of the wall. He wouldn't have cared, but I knew I would never hear the end of it if we made the bed creak or moaned too loudly. We settled for kissing and jerking each other off and then as usual, I curled up with my back to Jacob, his arms tight around me and his face in my neck. Exhausted and tipsy, it took me only minutes to fall asleep, holding Jacob's hand over my heart and the watch still on my wrist.


	18. Chapter 18

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

******Jacob's POV**

It seemed strange waking up in Edward's bed instead of my own. I opened my eyes as he slid away from me and went to the bathroom, wondering if we dare start fooling around again when Jasper was the other side of the wall. However, I heard Edward start the shower and realised he wasn't planning on coming back to bed. Damn. I slid out of it and went into the bathroom.

"Hey, don't I get an invite?"

"Sorry, I thought you were still asleep. I guess I'm self-conscious here; Jasper has big ears."

"He can't hear us in here." I closed the bathroom door. "Just give me a minute."

I took a pee and brushed my teeth, then stepped into the shower stall. Edward had a sponge in his hand lathered in shower gel and he immediately began to rub it over my shoulders and chest, then down over my stomach. I was hard in seconds as usual and I pushed his hand lower and leaned closer to kiss him.

"I can't wait until we can do this every morning," I groaned as he took the sponge away and wrapped his hand around my cock instead. "I can't get enough of you, Edward."

He grinned and began rubbing his hand up and down my shaft firmly, his own hard cock bumping against it as he did so. I reached down to give it some attention and we jerked each other off slowly, then reluctantly parted and washed ourselves. Much as I would have liked to stay in the shower playing with him until the water ran cold, we had an important task to undertake that morning - talking to Edward's parents about moving in together.

We dried ourselves quickly and dressed, then headed downstairs to get some breakfast. Emmett and Rosalie were already in the kitchen making coffee and Esme was grilling bacon and hash browns and beginning to scramble some eggs.

"Is Dad here?" Edward asked, grabbing two mugs to make coffee for himself and me.

"Yes, he's in the shower," Esme said. "He's not due at the hospital until four."

"Oh, good, I want to talk to you about something." Edward glanced at me a touch anxiously and I gave him an encouraging smile.

"Don't tell me, you're going to moan about the party," Emmett said. "Ed, it was your twenty-first, it'll be the last one you'll get."

"Don't you have to take Rose home soon?" frowned Edward.

"No, she's staying for lunch, right, babe?"

Rosalie nodded and Edward sighed.

"Honey, if you just want to talk to Dad and me about something, the others can occupy themselves," Esme said. "Jacob, how do you like your eggs? Is scrambled ok?"

"Yes, great, thanks," I said and caught Edward's eye. "It'll be ok," I mouthed.

"Emmett, get Jasper, will you? Breakfast will be five minutes." Esme dropped eight slices of bread into the toaster and placed a pan of oatmeal on the stove.

Emmett left the room and bellowed up the stairs to Jasper, threatening him with the oatmeal he and Edward were eating if he didn't move his ass. I grinned to myself. I felt almost like part of the family as I joined them for breakfast.

Afterwards, Jasper was given the task of loading the dishwasher and tidying up the kitchen, which he grumbled loudly about and Emmett and Rose went back to Emmett's room. Edward had already mentioned to Carlisle that we wanted to talk to them after breakfast and we headed into one of the lounges with more coffee. Edward closed the door behind us, chewing his lip nervously. I really didn't see that he had anything to worry about. His parents were amazing and they seemed to like me.

"This seems serious," Carlisle said, sipping his coffee. "Are you alright, Edward?"

"Yes, thanks, I'm fine." He stopped and glanced at me.

"It'll be ok," I whispered again.

"Um...I want to move in with Jacob," he blurted.

Carlisle's eyebrows rose. "Isn't this a bit soon?"

"I know it seems like that, but we know what we want," he said. "It's not a spur of the moment decision."

"It's obvious how happy you two are together," Esme put in. "We just worry about you, Edward; you've been through an awful lot this year."

"That was all because I had no confidence and I let a cruel and selfish person walk all over me when I should have walked away," Edward said firmly. "I thought I was a failure, but I'm a different person to what I was then. Jacob helped me to be different and we love each other. That's not going to change and we're always going to be together so what's the point waiting, when we know what we want?"

"I've no doubt that's true," Carlisle said. "We can all see the difference in you, but I still think you're rushing things."

"I'm not so sure I agree." I looked at Esme in surprise, not having expected her to argue with Carlisle. "It's obvious you're good for Edward, Jacob, and much as it does seem like this has all happened very fast, I've never seen Edward so happy and confident." She smiled at Edward. "You disappear for whole weekends as it is."

"Where will you live?" Carlisle asked. "Are you planning on keeping your house, Jacob?"

"I intended to sell it so we could buy a place together," I told him. "I thought Edward would prefer it, but he doesn't agree."

"It's a nice house and Jacob's business is right on the doorstep, it would be silly to move," Edward said.

"There's no mortgage," I put in. "I own the house, the outbuildings and the land outright."

Carlisle remained silent for another moment and then nodded slowly. "I can't really think of any arguments that you wouldn't have an answer for. We - that is, Esme and I - only want what's best for you, Edward, and Jacob clearly makes you happy."

"I'll never let him down," I promised. "You've nothing to worry about on that score."

Esme smiled at both of us. "So, have you thought about when you'd move, Edward?"

"Next weekend," he said at once and grinned. "I'd go today, but we thought we'd give you a week to try and talk me out of it."

Carlisle's lips curved up into a smile at last. "We're not going to do that. You're old enough to make your own decisions. We just want to be sure it's right for you, that's all."

The conversation moved on to less serious things, such as me bringing my truck over the following week for all of Edward's belongings and Esme insisting that we come over for Sunday lunch at least twice a month. The whole thing had gone much better than I expected. Despite reassuring Edward that it would be ok, I hadn't been convinced myself that his parents wouldn't make a fuss about him moving in with me so soon, especially after Bella, but it felt good to know that they liked and trusted me so much.

A little later we told Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper, which resulted in much teasing and taunting and even a joke from Jasper that the sound of wedding bells would swiftly follow. Edward glowered at him at this point and hissed something that I didn't catch, his face red. That puzzled me and I wondered whether his previous experience had made him hate the idea of marriage or whether he was just embarrassed about what I might think of the joke. I hadn't actually thought any further than us moving in together and even that had been quite recent. Now Jasper had put the idea into my head though, I wondered if that would be something that would be on the cards for us in the future. Would I want to get married at some point? Would Edward? I planned on spending the rest of my life with him and couldn't ever see that changing, but would he want a ring on his finger to confirm it and make it official? Would he be disappointed if I didn't, or would he hate the idea of it? I shoved the thoughts aside, knowing it was ridiculous even to be considering it at this point. We had only just decided to move in together and there was no need to think about anything further.

The next week passed by surprisingly quickly. I had expected it to drag as Edward and I anticipated Saturday when he would move into my house, but both of us were busy with work, snatching a couple hours each evening to be together and in almost no time it was Friday night. Edward stayed over as usual and when we rose on Saturday, for once we got up, showered and dressed without even thinking about spending an hour or two extra in bed. Edward looked as excited as I felt and we skipped breakfast, setting off in the truck at eight o'clock to get his things. He had already packed up the majority into boxes and we found them stacked in the hallway waiting for us, having been moved downstairs by Emmett and Jasper.

"What's this? Can't you wait to get rid of me?" Edward said.

"I sure can't, it gets a bit much hearing you moaning every other night," Jasper teased.

Edward flushed, but laughed. "You're just jealous, Jasper. Anyway, I've had to put up with you getting yourself off the other side of the wall for years."

Jasper grinned. "I'm not jealous, I have a date."

"When? You kept that quiet!"

"Tonight," he beamed. "Paul's been texting me all week. He's taking me to the movies."

"Well, keep your pants on, he might hang around," Edward said, much to my surprise. I was even more surprised when Jasper blushed. I hadn't seen or spoken to Paul since the party, but it seemed like they were getting along well so far.

Emmett and Jasper both helped us load the boxes into the truck and then Edward packed up his computer equipment and desk, which easily dismantled, the remainder of his clothes and a few other bits and pieces and it was all done. Carlisle was at the hospital, but Esme came outside to watch us drive off, hugging Edward with tears in her eyes as if he was moving to the other side of the country instead of a few miles down the road. She gave him a large plastic box which contained a cake she had made us and then Jasper came out with a plastic bag in his hand and passed it to Edward just before he got in the truck.

"What's this?"

"Leaving present," Jasper smirked. "Enjoy."

Edward peered into the bag and his whole face suffused with colour, including his ears.

"What's in it?" I asked.

"For God's sake, Jasper!" Edward muttered, ignoring my question.

"Don't tell me they'll go to waste. I probably saved you a fortune," Jasper sniggered.

Edward climbed into the truck, still scarlet, but smiling and I started the engine.

"You gonna tell me what's in the bag?" I asked again as we set off down the driveway.

"A bumper pack of condoms and some bottles of flavoured lube."

"Very thoughtful," I smirked. "Could be useful later. You moving in with me is worth a huge celebration."

A few hours later, all of Edward's things were put away and immediately the house had become ours, instead of mine. When I opened my closet his clothes were hanging in there; a photograph of his whole family stood on the shelf in the lounge with mine of Dad and my sisters; his computer desk and equipment were all set up in the room with the piano and his music and books were on shelves in the same room. We cut large chunks of Esme's cake and slouched on the sofa with our feet up and it already felt like Edward belonged there with me.

In the evening I ordered takeout and opened the bottle of wine I had chilling in the refrigerator and we finished the meal with more of Esme's cake. It was only when we turned the lights off and went to my room that things seemed any different from usual. Somehow taking him to bed on our first night living together was more special and much as I was desperate to get my hands on him and pound him into the mattress by that point, I decided to take my time instead - celebrate each other as well as the start of our life together, as corny as it sounded.

We undressed slowly, one piece of clothing at a time, standing on opposite sides of the bed and watching each other's every move. Edward could be a tease when he took his clothes off, whether he intended to be or not, but this time I knew he was doing it on purpose. A faint blush coloured his cheeks and he smirked as he unfastened his shirt one button at a time, allowing me a little peek of his chest every so often, then rather than take the garment off altogether, stopping to bend down and remove his socks. I bit my lip to suppress a groan and dragged my t-shirt off over my head. I was already hard and my jeans were uncomfortably tight.

Edward straightened up slowly and let the shirt slip off his shoulders and I raked my eyes down his chest, admiring his pecs and six-pack. He was so fucking hot and so different from when I had first got to know him - all skin and bones and embarrassed about me seeing him. I licked my lips as my eyes followed the narrow line of hair from his navel to the top of his pants, then eyed the unmistakable shape of his erection under the dark grey fabric. I unzipped my jeans quickly to relieve the pressure on my cock and let my hand rest on it for a moment, rubbing myself slowly as Edward unbuckled his belt. It took all my willpower not to race around to the other side of the bed and drag his pants off of him, then throw him onto the bed beneath me. I stopped touching myself reluctantly and pushed my jeans down my legs, stepping out of them as Edward lowered his zipper and let the smart pants drop to his ankles. He was wearing white jersey shorts underneath which hid absolutely nothing. His cock twitched slightly and a damp patch had already formed around the head.

"Shit," I muttered. "You have no idea how sexy you are, do you?"

"Not a clue," he smiled. He ran his hand up and down his length a couple of times and then slid his hand under the waistband of his shorts, gripping himself and moaning softly.

"Fucking hell, Edward," I groaned. I yanked my shorts down, dived onto the bed and grabbed him around the waist, pulling him off his feet into my arms, covering his mouth with mine and thrusting my tongue in. He took his hand out of his shorts and wrapped both arms around me, kissing me back heatedly and squirming beneath me. I lifted my lower body slightly and slid my hand between us to pull his shorts down, but to my surprise he suddenly pushed me off and rolled me onto my back, then sat up.

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing. I just have an idea in my head about how I want my official first night here to go."

"You're going to torment me, aren't you?" I groaned.

"I just want to make things last." He grinned and shifted his eyes away from mine. "I know you're dying to just...fuck me...but you're going to have to wait."

I beamed, despite knowing he was going to make me suffer. I loved how his confidence had come along in leaps and bounds in such a short space of time and I knew a good part of it was down to the way I had treated him. I absently slid my hand down to grasp my cock, but immediately Edward grabbed my wrist and pulled it away.

"None of that," he said.

"Damn you."

I let my hands fall to the mattress either side of me and looked down at my erection as it twitched against my belly. Edward slid off the bed again and removed his shorts, his own cock just as hard as mine. He wrapped his hand around it and stroked himself slowly, rubbing his thumb over the head until it oozed pre-cum and then licking his fingers. My eyes widened and my cock throbbed painfully.

"Jesus Christ," I hissed. "You're killing me here."

"You want to taste me?" he asked.

"You know I do."

He kneeled on the bed close to my head, positioning himself so that when I turned my face towards him, he could push the head of his cock against my lips. I opened my mouth eagerly and the head slid in. I swirled my tongue around it and sucked gently, tasting the musky saltiness of him and moaning. I raised my hand to his butt and squeezed the firm flesh, sliding my fingers between his cheeks until he pushed my hand off and backed away.

"Hey, come back here," I protested.

"In a minute." He leaned over the side of the bed and retrieved the bag Jasper had given him, pulling out a bottle of pink lube. He unsealed the top and pumped some out into his hand, immediately releasing the sweet smell of strawberries. He coated his palm and the fingers of his other hand with it, then lay down with his head close to my feet and his legs parted, the knees drawn up.

"Oh, fuck," I groaned. He was going to lie there getting himself off and refusing to even let me touch myself. I groaned as he curled his slick hand around his cock and covered it in strawberry lube, slowly beginning to stroke himself and inserting one finger carefully into his hole at the same time.

"You are such a fucking tease," I moaned.

"Mmm," he sighed, adding a second finger. "Do you like this?"

"I'd like it more if I could get my hands on you," I growled.

He ignored me for a moment, thrusting his fingers into himself and rubbing his cock firmly, writhing and groaning in front of me as he pleasured himself. I could barely stand it and my cock was already leaking pre-cum onto my belly without either of us even touching it. I wouldn't have been in the least surprised if I came without any stimulation other than the visuals.

"Please," I begged. "At least come back here and let me suck you. I want to see if that stuff really tastes of strawberries."

He hesitated for a moment and then took his hands off of himself and sat up slowly.

"Come here and sit on my chest," I suggested, imagining him crouching over me and fucking my mouth. My cock quivered and I groaned as he shifted onto his knees and straddled me, slowly edging forward with his thighs spread wide either side of me until his cock bumped my chin. I slid my tongue out and swiped at the tip, surprised that the lube did actually taste of the fruit, mingled with the mouthwatering taste of Edward. Pausing, he grabbed the bottle and squeezed more of the lube out, coating my fingers in it, then leaning over me with his hands braced on the wall above my head. His cock pushed into my mouth and I raised my hand, feeling for his tight hole and sliding first one and then two fingers into him.

"Oh, God," he hissed.

"Mmm," I mumbled around his cock. Only half of his length was in my mouth and he barely moved, as if worried he might choke me in this position. I thrust my fingers deeper and placed my other hand on his butt, squeezing and pulling him down, relaxing my throat muscles as his head bumped the back of it. He felt amazing like that, his cock pushing into my throat, his balls bumping my chin, tight muscles clenching around my fingers. I sucked and licked, cleaning the lube off him until the flavour of strawberries was replaced by the taste of him. My fingertips brushed his prostate and he groaned, his thighs trembling as he struggled to hold back his orgasm. He managed it for perhaps another thirty seconds and then tried to pull off of me.

"I'm coming...shit..." he panted. I gripped him tighter, keeping him in place and swallowing around him as he emptied himself into my throat, moaning and crying out my name. I slid my fingers out slowly and he pulled out of my mouth.

"Oh, God," he gasped. "I thought I'd choke you."

I grinned. "That was so hot. I hope you're going to put me out of my misery now. I want you so badly, I need to be inside you."

"In a few minutes, when I'm ready again." Still breathless, he stretched out beside me and ran his hand over my chest, pinching one of my nipples gently before moving across to the other. After a moment he replaced his finger and thumb with his mouth and idly stroked his fingers down over my stomach.

"You know you're gonna make me come doing that," I warned.

"I hope so."

"That's probably a good idea, if we start making love now I won't even last a minute."

Edward lowered his hand to my thighs, stroking up and down while he worked his mouth tormentingly slowly down my body towards my cock, which strained desperately upwards in an effort to reach his lips. His tongue circled my navel and his hand cupped my balls, squeezing lightly.

"Oh, fuck, please, touch me," I begged.

"That's what I'm doing," Edward smirked, tugging gently on my balls.

"Fucking tease. Touch my cock...please..."

"What shall I touch it with?" He brushed the tip of one finger against the base of my shaft and then flicked his tongue over the head.

"Anything!" I gasped. "Just...God...suck me..."

I hardly knew what I was saying, aching and frustrated, but a moment later I let out a sigh of relief as Edward wrapped his hand around me suddenly and changed position, kneeling astride one of my thighs and guiding me into his mouth. I was shamefully quick. Watching his head bob up and down, his lips wrapped around my cock, the feel of his tongue flicking at me and his hand following the movement of his mouth had me erupting in probably no more than a minute. I groaned and swore, bucking my hips off the bed in an effort to push deeper into his throat as I came hard and he continued sucking, cheeks hollowed, until he had drained me and I was begging him to stop as I became too sensitive. He released me at last and lay down beside me, resting his head against my shoulder. He was hard again already and when he touched his lips to mine I could taste myself.

"Sometimes you really surprise me," I breathed, my chest rising and falling rapidly.

"Why, because I'm not all shy and scared any more?"

"I guess...you're fucking sexy, Edward," I said. "You drive me crazy."

"I think it's just that I know I don't have anything to worry about any more," he murmured. "You always treated me so amazingly, even when you couldn't stand me you still took care of me. Then seeing how much you love me and wanting me to live with you...this is how I always wanted to be, I just didn't have anything...anyone to encourage me."

"You're amazing," I told him. "I love you."

"I love you too."

He moved against me and his erection prodded me in the hip. Despite having only just come, my cock had only half softened and the feel of him had it immediately stiffening fully again.

"You want to take charge of this too?" I asked.

"No, I just want you inside me."

"Which way do you like it best?" I knew exactly what he would say before he answered.

"On my back, so I can see you and hold onto you."

I sat up quickly. "Lemon or strawberry?"

Edward sniggered, leaned over the edge of the bed and produced another bottle. "Chocolate."

"Jesus, where the hell did Jasper get that?"

"I don't know, online probably. He's got an account with some sex shop, we're always getting mysterious brown parcels delivered for him."

I opened the bottle and sniffed. "If this tastes as good as it smells, I'm tempted to rub it all over you and lick it off - slowly."

Edward groaned. "Next time."

"After you teasing me like that I've a good mind to make it this time," I threatened. "Make you wait." I stroked my hand over his abs and he shuddered. "But I won't, I can't wait myself."

I grabbed a condom from the top drawer and tore open the packet. Edward was already reasonably well prepared, but after rolling the condom on and coating myself in chocolate lube, I squirted a little extra onto my fingers and slid two of them into him, scissoring them and stretching him a little more.

"That's enough, please," he moaned.

Throbbing and eager, I didn't need any more encouragement and I withdrew my fingers, pushed his legs wider apart and guided myself into him. He thrust himself up against me, his hands gripping my butt and pulling me into him.

"Can you take more?" I asked.

"Yes...I think so..." His green eyes looked puzzled and I propped myself up further, taking most of my weight on one arm while I tucked the other behind his knee and pushed it further up. Switching I did the same with his other leg and eased myself into him another inch.

"Oh, fuck..." he moaned.

"Ok?"

"Jesus...yes...uh..."

"Touch yourself," I encouraged as I began to move slowly, dropping my eyes to his erection as he grasped it and began to jerk himself off, his rhythm matching that of my cock thrusting inside him. I lifted my eyes to his again and held his gaze as I moved faster, increasing pace and vigour gradually until I was slamming myself into him, his free hand braced on the wall behind him to stop me shoving him into it. When we came, we did it together - me filling the condom and him spurting through his hand onto his chest. I moved my arms slowly, one at a time, letting his legs slide down before I pulled out of him, grinning to myself at the mixture of arousing scents surrounding us - sweat, cum, chocolate and strawberries. I reminded myself to thank Jasper for the gift next time I saw him.

I disposed of the condom, removed the bottles of lube from the bed and collapsed beside Edward, my chest heaving with the exertion and my body slick with sweat. Edward panted and gasped beside me, his copper hair tousled, cheeks flushed from his orgasm and his eyes a deeper, darker shade of green than usual. I reached for his hand and entwined my fingers with his, brushing my lips against his shoulder.

"I love you so much, baby," I whispered.

"I love you too." He nestled closer to me and tucked his face into my neck.

Five more minutes, I thought, then we would get up and shower and change the sheets. We were sweaty, sticky, disgustingly, wonderfully covered in a mixture of fluids, but before I could move even one limb in an effort to get up, I had fallen asleep.


	19. Chapter 19

CHAPTER NINETEEN

******Jacob's POV**

Living with Edward was everything I hoped it would be. Waking up with him every morning, sharing a shower together, me heading over to the garage to work with Seth while Edward worked on his computers or went out to meet clients. Usually he would make lunch and I would snatch a half hour to be with him in the middle of the day; then we spent our evenings either cooking together or going out to eat, cuddling on the couch as we watched television or hanging out with some of our friends. Occasionally Embry or Seth would come over, or Jasper and Paul. They seemed pretty solid and Jasper constantly had a smug look on his face like the cat that got the cream. Edward told me he'd never found love before, always too keen to drop his pants at the first opportunity and missing out on finding someone who wanted to date him. He had apparently held out for almost a month before he slept with Paul and the man I had once seen as a thug was clearly becoming besotted with him. Most Sundays we spent a few hours at the Cullens' house and Edward continued working out with Emmett a few times a week. Emmett and Rosalie were engaged now and looking for a house of their own to buy.

The next few months seemed to be filled with wedding talk. Every time we saw Emmett and Rose, it was all they talked about. Rosalie's family weren't terribly well off and Carlisle had insisted on paying for everything, which delighted Rose when she realised she could have the dress of her dreams and flowers and cake and music and a honeymoon and everything else. Emmett started coming over to our house a couple times a week to escape and confessed that much as he adored Rosalie and couldn't wait for their married life to start, the 'big day' was becoming the bane of his life and he wanted it over and done with. Emmett was one of the most laid back people I knew, but with everyone stressing around him, he was becoming uncharacteristically tense.

Emmett asked Edward to be his best man. It had been difficult for him to decide between his two brothers and he even considered having them both, but Jasper stepped down, insisting that he wanted Edward to have the honour.

"I'll be yours when you get married," he grinned at Edward.

I was far enough away from the discussion for Edward to be unsure whether I had heard or not, but I saw him colour up vividly and glance anxiously in my direction. I wondered again if he would want to get married or not. I had casually investigated one day when he was out, looking online to see if it would be possible and discovered that although gay marriage wasn't legal in Washington yet, it would be in just a few months. I put it out of my mind for the time being, concentrating instead on the happiness we shared right now instead.

Emmett and Rosalie married in September, the wedding being held in the grounds of the Cullens' house and performed by a minister whom Carlisle knew through the hospital. Rosalie had wanted everyone wearing white and Edward and I put on our rented suits at home, both grimacing at ourselves and laughing. Edward thought too much white made him look colourless and spooky like a vampire and I thought it made me look much darker than I actually was. Still, the bride had to have what she wanted on her special day and we could put up with it for a few hours. I teased Edward by saying I would whisper things to make him blush so that he didn't look too pale.

We sat on benches decorated with flowers and ribbons in a clearing between the trees while the ceremony took place and afterwards Carlisle, Rosalie's father, Emmett and Edward all gave speeches. Edward had been fretting about his speech for weeks, practising on me countless times and rewriting over and over until he was convinced it was worse than his first draft, but he did an amazing job. I beamed at him as I watched him in the awful white suit, his copper hair all over the place despite his attempts to suppress it with gel, a glass of champagne in his hand as he regaled the crowd with a few amusing anecdotes about Emmett and finished with what a wonderful brother he was and how he had always looked out for Jasper and himself.

After the cake was cut, everyone went into the house to dance as the small orchestra Carlisle had hired played. I danced with Edward several times and spotted Jasper and Paul smooching together in a corner at the other side of the room.

Late that evening, a chauffered limousine arrived to take Emmett and Rose to Seattle to catch a plane to their honeymoon destination - Paris, no less - and Edward and I spent the night in Edward's old room, rather than make our way home after the large quantity of champagne we had poured down our necks. I noticed that Paul stayed over too and looked surprisingly awkward in the morning as if he worried Carlisle and Esme would complain, which of course they didn't. They were as happy for Jasper as they were that Edward had found me.

A few more weeks passed and I began thinking about my future with Edward again. I knew I wanted to marry him and in just a few days the law would allow us to tie the knot in Washington if we wanted. Should I ask him? We hadn't discussed it, not even casually when the opportunity had been right in front of us at Emmett and Rosalie's wedding and I really didn't know what his thoughts on it were. I wondered if I should casually drop it into the conversation to get him talking about it or whether I should just take the bull by the horns and propose to him. I went over and over it in my head for days and I knew Edward could see I had something on my mind. He asked me twice if something was wrong and I said no, but his disappointed expression told me he knew I lied.

Then at the weekend another opportunity arose to at least discuss it and I took it. We were watching a movie on television and halfway through it broke for a ten minute news programme. The first article to be discussed was the law change on gay marriage in several States, including Washington. The newsreader described a large positive reaction to this and an equally large demonstration against. Whether people approved or disagreed didn't interest me one bit - I was only interested in what Edward thought and I eyed him sideways as he watched the news, his lower lip caught between his teeth. I slid my arm around him and tugged him closer to my side.

"What do you think about getting married?" I blurted before I could change my mind. "Would you ever want to?"

He turned to face me and his eyes widened. "You mean...marry you?"

"No, baby, I wondered if you'll go off and marry somebody else," I teased, thinking if I lightened the mood it wouldn't sound like a proposal. "I just wondered if it's something you want. Since they changed the law, we could if we wanted..."

"Um..." Edward's eyes dropped away from mine and he trembled slightly. "Is it what you want?"

"I want to be with you for the rest of my life," I said. "Whether you have my ring on your finger or not. The most important thing to me is that I have you with me every minute possible; but I want to know what you think."

"Yes," he said quietly. "I would like to, but at the same time the thought terrifies me. Being the centre of attention in front of hordes of people, everybody watching my every move, and wondering if..." He broke off and shivered.

"Wondering if I'd turn up?" I whispered. I hadn't forgotten what had happened to him before.

"I'm sorry. It's not that I think that would happen, I just...it was horrible," he said simply.

"I know." I hugged him tighter against me and brushed my lips against his temple. "If we did...one day...it wouldn't have to be anything like that. If you wanted, we could just take off somewhere with a couple of witnesses and get married without anybody watching. Maybe just have your family there."

"You'd do that for me?"

"Of course I would. I wouldn't care one bit who was there as long as you were. So will you marry me? One day?"

"Yes," he said at once. "One day I will."

I hadn't realised how much I actually did want for us to be married until he said yes and although it wasn't likely to be any time soon, I was delighted as I thought that one day, Edward would be my husband.

We spent a couple of days at the Cullens' house at Christmas in Edward's old room. For once the house was crowded and Carlisle and Esme clearly loved it. Emmett and Rosalie were there, Jasper had Paul stay the entire week as he didn't have family of his own to be with and Rosalie's parents came over for Christmas dinner. In the afternoon Rosalie conspicuously disappeared for a little while with Carlisle and returned with an enormous smile on her face to announce one final Christmas present for Emmett - she was six weeks pregnant. Emmett looked like a kid who had just unwrapped a gift he had been begging for all year. I could imagine him being a brilliant father; a lot of the time he behaved like a child himself.

Two weeks into the New Year it was my birthday and despite being past twenty-one, the Cullens threw one of their infamous parties for me, their reasoning being that I had missed out since I didn't meet Edward until I was twenty-two. They invited all of my friends, Edward confessing later to having grilled Seth one day when I was in Forks collecting parts, to ensure he didn't miss anyone important.

It was during the party that I discovered Edward had begun thinking about getting married as much as I had. He had disappeared and I assumed he must have gone to the bathroom or something. The supply of my favourite beer had been depleted and I headed for the kitchen to grab some more from the refrigerator. As I reached the door I heard Edward and Jasper talking in low voices and thinking they were maybe planning some other surprise for me, I halted outside the door and eavesdropped.

"...I doubt he'll bring it up again, I said 'one day'," Edward was saying.

"So why don't you ask him?"

"I can't."

"Why the hell not?" Jasper said. "You already know he'll say yes. It's not like you're a girl and you have to wait for a Leap year or some shit."

"Mmm..."

I peeked around the door and saw Edward drag a hand through his hair.

"What happened to your confidence?" Jasper went on. "Just ask him. Or shall I do it? Hey, Jake, will you marry Edward?"

"Fuck off, Jasper!" Edward hissed.

"Well, stop being such a wuss about it then."

I withdrew quickly and returned to the party, the beer forgotten and my heart banging against my ribs. He wanted to marry me! Not 'one day' any more, but now...soon. If I asked him now, or tomorrow, or next week, he would say...

"You alright, Jake?" Emmett clapped a hand onto my shoulder and I almost leaped out of my skin.

"Yeah, just thinking."

"Don't worry, I made Dad promise not to embarrass you too much in his speech," he grinned.

"I should hope so!"

I pushed my thoughts aside again for the rest of the evening, but they quickly resurfaced once the guests had left. I was excited and nervous and I wondered how I should go about proposing. Just whisper it in bed or do it properly, go out and buy rings first. Should I speak to his parents? Suddenly there seemed a lot more to it and despite my relief after having heard his conversation with Jasper, I found myself worrying again. I so wanted to do it right.

The next morning I woke early. Edward was still snoring softly and I dressed and crept out of the room, deciding to get some coffee to clear my head from the lingering effects of the beer. I found Paul and Jasper already in the kitchen, smooching while they waited for the coffee to percolate.

"Up early, aren't you?" I teased.

They jumped apart and shoved their hands into their pockets, much to my amusement.

"I'll be in the gym," Paul said with a smirk and took himself off.

I closed the kitchen door and leaned on it. "Can I talk to you, Jasper?"

"Sure, what about?" He poured out two coffees and passed me one of the mugs.

"I overheard you talking to Edward last night."

He frowned for a moment. "Ohhhh..." He paused and sipped his coffee. "And?"

"Is he going to ask me?"

"I doubt it, he doesn't have the guts. Even though he's sure you'll say yes. Plus he's got a stick up his ass about the whole marriage thing. He'd deny it until he's blue in the face, but I know a part of him thinks he'll get to the altar and you won't be there."

"I know," I said. "So I want your advice on something. We did talk about it a while ago, sort of vaguely, and I know he doesn't want anything big and official with lots of people."

"Why don't you do it abroad? Like in the Caribbean or somewhere?" suggested Jasper. "Make like it's a vacation and surprise him. He won't have any time to freak out about it and if you and him turn up to wherever the minister is, he won't have the whole arriving at the altar and wondering if you're there to go through."

"Yeah, but he might end up feeling bulldozed into it," I sighed.

"He won't. You obviously didn't hang around to hear the whole conversation. He said he wished you'd just surprise him one day so he wouldn't have to stress out through the build up."

"Seriously? He said that?"

"Yeah. I'm not gonna make shit up about something like that, Jake, I've seen Edward suffer enough."

"Wow. Thanks." I relaxed immediately. "What about your parents?"

"They'll understand. I think you should not tell them beforehand though. They won't complain about you getting married, but they won't like Edward being kept in the dark about it, even though it's best for him it's done that way and they'd probably want to at least plan some huge party which he'd hate. Maybe you could...bring me and Paul along for witnesses." He smirked now. "I could do with a vacation somewhere hot and I did promise Ed I'd be his best man. Emmett and Rose probably aren't going to want to fly anywhere until after the baby's born."

"Thanks, Jasper," I said again.

"No problem. Just one other thing. Don't wear fucking white suits, white does nothing for either of you."

"I know," I snorted.

I was filled with excitement and eager to start investigating the possibilities at the first opportunity. I waited in vain for two weeks for Edward to go out and meet with a client like he often did, but he was working on a huge complicated website that kept him in the house day after day, poring over his computers and I didn't dare look anything up in case he caught me. Eventually I took my laptop into the garage one Monday morning, cringing as I told Edward I needed to search for some car parts that weren't available in Forks. He accepted it without question, but the small lie was in a good cause and with a quiet morning, Seth undertaking the one service we had booked in, I sat down and got online.

"What are you doing?" Seth asked. "I hope you're not looking at porn while I'm working."

"Fuck off," I muttered, an image of Edward fucking my mouth the way he had about eight hours earlier popping into my mind.

"Yeah, you don't need to," chortled Seth. "You and Ed are so hot for each other, the air practically smoulders when you get within ten feet of each other."

"Jeez, Seth, get on with your work."

My face felt like it was smouldering and I focused on the laptop, typing 'Gay marriage abroad' into Google. There were plenty of destinations available and companies which offered whole packages, but I didn't want a package - I wanted a licence and a minister who would marry us somewhere unofficial, like on a beach or a boat or something - nothing more. I opened another website which caught my attention and it seemed like it might offer just what I was looking for.

"Tailor Made Weddings?" Seth read and I realised he had crept up next to me and was peering at the screen.

"Seth! Damnit!"

"You gonna marry Edward?"

"Well, I'm not gonna marry you, Seth! Look, you can't say anything, ok? No one knows anything about it, except for Jasper."

"Not even Edward?"

"Least of all him. He wants to get married, but he'd freak out over some big planned thing where he has to turn up at the altar wondering if I'm there or not."

"Shit...of course," Seth said. "So you're just going to whisk him off somewhere and pretend like it's a vacation or something?"

"Yes."

"Awesome! I won't say a word," he promised. "When are you going to do it?"

"I don't know...soon. You'll be ok running the shop for a week, right?"

"Sure, there's never much I can't handle. Are you going to take anyone else? For witnesses?"

"Jasper and Paul," I said. "Maybe Embry. I haven't thought about that yet, this is the first chance I got to look into it."

I turned my attention back to the laptop and looked through the list of destinations available on the Tailor Made site. Hawaii looked interesting and when I read further, it turned out I could get exactly what I wanted - a priest, a private location and either a reception, a cruise or...nothing. We could just walk away after we signed the papers and do what we wanted. The operators were based in New York and I pulled out my phone, deciding to call and enquire rather than email and have to wait for an answer.

An hour later, I had my credit card in my nervously sweaty hand and was authorising a payment of over three thousand dollars. I wasn't usually one to rush things, but I felt like I had found exactly what I wanted. Flights from Sea-Tac to Honolulu and a car to take us to a private villa on the beach where we could spend a week vacationing. On the third day we would arrive on a jetty at dusk to meet the priest who would marry us, following which a private yacht would take us on a sunset dinner cruise and return us later to the villa. We would then have the remainder of the week to use as a honeymoon. Our wedding day would be 3 April - two months away.

"Oh, fuck," I giggled as I hung up. "I'm getting married!" I didn't need to tell Seth the details; he had been listening to my side of the phone call and was beaming from ear to ear.

"Don't forget to get rings," he said now. "And suits. And book flights for your witnesses."

"Oh, shit. Damnit." I grabbed the phone again and called Jasper and then Embry. Both were delighted to hear the news - and a little shocked in Embry's case - and eager to be included. Jasper asked for my bank details and said he would transfer money for the flights and a hotel for him and Paul and I told Embry he needn't worry about expenses. I knew he didn't earn much and a flight to Hawaii and a few days in a hotel would wipe out his savings. I went online again and booked three seats on a flight the day after mine and Edward's and two hotel rooms in a decent establishment not far from the villa. When I checked my bank account later I found a thousand dollars more than I needed had arrived and Jasper had emailed me to say it was a wedding gift.

I knew it was going to be quite a task keeping things secret for two months, but I decided to tell Edward that at least I had arranged a vacation for us. He was nearing the finish of the website he was working on so I would wait until then and surprise him. He was looking pretty tired lately and I knew he sometimes worked on into the night after I fell asleep in an effort to get the thing completed and impress the client.

Two days later I needed to go into Forks to collect some parts and I took the opportunity to go into a jewellery store to look at rings. I was pretty sure I could get the right size for Edward; I had made sure to notice when I held his hand the day before, lacing our fingers together and surreptitiously comparing. His third finger was the same thickness as my pinky and now I stood in the store trying on a pair of rings for the sizes and staring at the huge array of designs in disbelief. Weren't wedding rings just plain bands? Apparently not.

"What do you think your bride to be would like?" the sales girl asked and I couldn't help a snigger.

_"____He_doesn't like anything too fancy," I said.

"Oh!" She smiled suddenly. "We've had quite a number of young male couples in lately, you know since the law changed. If you'd like something quite plain, how about the white gold? I always think somehow it's nicer than yellow and these here..." She produced a display box. "...can be engraved on the inside if you like."

It took me maybe another fifteen minutes to decide. I went for plain white gold bands with a brushed effect at the edges and had them engraved with my name in his and his in mine along with the word 'forever'. It seemed embarrassingly corny and I examined them with a red face afterwards, but with it, a huge smile as I thought about slipping the smaller ring onto Edward's finger in a few weeks' time. I knew he would like my choice.

The sales girl placed the two rings in little velvet-lined boxes and I handed over my credit card again and signed away another six hundred dollars. I thought with amusement that it was lucky we were going for the quiet and private approach or the savings I had been building up would disappear in record time. Then again, Edward had a tonne of money and would be spending some of his if we did this together.

I stopped off to see Embry on the way back and entrusted him with the rings, not wanting to risk Edward finding them. I had already had to intercept the mail that morning when a large thick envelope arrived from New York containing the papers I needed to sign, but luckily Edward had already been working and hadn't noticed. I hid the papers in the garage and roped in Seth to help me with one other small task. That evening I dragged Edward away from his computers for a couple hours and took him out for dinner, having left a spare house key with Seth. While we sat enjoying plates of pasta, Seth would be grabbing Edward's passport from the drawer where he kept it, running home to Xerox it and replacing it so that I could send it off with the papers the next day. The wedding booking required a form of ID such as a birth certificate or passport to prove both parties were old enough and not illegals.

When we returned home from the restaurant, Edward went straight back to work and I went to watch television. I checked my phone, which was on silent, and discovered a message from Seth which simply read, 'Done.'

I checked off the things I had organised in my head, hoping nothing important had been forgotten. The wedding itself was organised, flights and hotel for Jasper, Paul and Embry, papers ready to mail in the morning, rings bought. The only thing I hadn't done anything about was outfits, but I decided not to. Why dress up in suits when only five of us would be there? When it was our special private day and we would be spending it on a jetty and a boat? I decided to buy some new summer clothes for us both - shirts and slacks - and leave it at that. I would tell the others to observe casual dress too. So apart from a trip to a clothing store before we took off for Hawaii, everything was done and all I had to do was keep it a secret.

Edward finished the website he was working on at the end of that week. It was early Friday evening and I made him some coffee and went into the room to take it to him, knowing he was probably tired and squinting at the screen with sore eyes the way he had been for the past couple of weeks. However, he was leaning back in the chair looking relaxed and satisfied. He looked up with a smile and took his glasses off as I went in.

"It's done, at long last."

"Awesome. I hope they're paying you well." I put the mug down on his desk and moved behind him, leaning down to wrap my arms around him and kiss his cheek. "You need a break."

"I intend to take one. I don't have anything booked in for the next week."

"A proper one," I said. "I have a surprise for you. I was waiting for you to finish this job before I told you."

"A surprise? What is it?"

I let go of him and he spun the chair around the face me.

"I booked us a little vacation."

"Is that what you've been up to lately?" he said with a grin. "You've been really weird the last few days; all guilty-looking like you've got a secret."

"Yeah, that was it," I chuckled. "Thirty-first March we are flying to Hawaii to stay in a private villa for a week. Sun, sea, sand...sex...no work."

"Hawaii? Really? That sounds amazing." Edward stood up quickly and threw his arms around my neck. "I can't wait. Thank you. I've been lousy company lately, haven't I?"

"No, you've just been busy, it's fine. But now I get to spoil you."

I heaved a sigh of relief and hugged him tighter against me. So far so good. He didn't suspect anything except me arranging a surprise vacation. Seven more weeks and we would be in Hawaii saying 'I do' and starting our life together as husbands.


	20. Chapter 20

**This is the last chapter, guys, hope you like it. I hope you enjoyed the story and thank you for all the reviews and alerts along the way, it means a lot :o)**

CHAPTER TWENTY

**Edward's POV**

I was so excited to be going on vacation with Jacob. I was pretty surprised that he had arranged it all, but it explained the shifty look he had about him for the past week or so. He had been even more wonderful to me than usual since I'd been working on that last website and I knew I'd been lousy company, often carrying on long into the night after he went to sleep. Most evenings he made me food, brought me coffees and kept out of my way, watching television or something with the volume so low it was a wonder he could hear it, just so it wouldn't distract me. Normally I wouldn't have let work take over my life so much, but it was an important client who wanted a large, complicated site - a well-known businessman who had come to me on the back of a recommendation from someone else and he could easily make or break my reputation. The site had given me endless headaches. He was pedantic and had changed his mind three times about what he wanted, but at long last it was done, he was happy and the ten thousand dollar fee was in my bank.

The vacation was exactly what I needed and Jacob had arranged everything - flights, a transfer car and a private villa. I offered to contribute to the costs, but he wouldn't hear of it and instead invited me to take him shopping as we would both need new clothes. On Saturday we went to Port Angeles and spent the whole day there, including eating lunch in one of the seafood restaurants down by the harbour. One of my credit cards was made good use of and by the time we left, the Skyline's trunk crammed with bags of clothes, Jacob was looking a little pale from the amount I spent and the number of times I made him try things on.

The following week I had no work on and I spent it relaxing after my endless nights with not enough sleep, poring over the computers and squinting with sore eyes. I visited my family and worked out with Emmett, hung out with Jacob and Seth in the garage and was generally idle, which wasn't like me, but for once I needed it. I had some smaller jobs booked in for the next month and after that I decided not to take on any more until after we returned from Hawaii. I didn't want to be worrying at the last minute that something I was working on would over-run because Jacob had already said he was banning me from taking even my iPad on vacation, just in case.

Despite our excitement, the next few weeks did pass quickly. We had Sunday lunch with my family as usual two days before we were due to fly to Hawaiii and Mom and Dad made me promise to take plenty of photographs. As we left, Jasper's parting comment was, 'See you soon,' and he gave Jacob a wink which he apparently thought I didn't see. That puzzled me, but the minute we were in the car I forgot about it as Jacob began talking about the trip and I felt a flutter of excitement again. It was some time since I'd had a vacation and a week in the sun with my lover would be amazing.

Two days later, Seth waved us off as we left for Sea-Tac in the truck, deciding not to leave one of our nice cars at the airport. Seth had been left a key to the house to check things over and he would continue to run the garage in our absence. The long drive went smoothly, the flight was on time and when we arrived at the other end, strangely Jacob left me to collect the cases from the conveyor belt and hurried out, saying he wanted to find our transport so we wouldn't have to wait. Shrugging, I grabbed the cases a few minutes later and followed. Jacob was outside standing beside a black Mercedes, grinning at the driver who was leaning against the side of the car. Jacob straightened his face and stood back then and the driver took the cases from me and loaded them into the trunk, then opened the rear door for us.

"A Mercedes for a transfer?" I said in a low voice.

"You could choose to travel in style," Jacob smiled. "I wanted our first vacation to be special."

The journey to the villa took around forty minutes and when we pulled up outside, the driver carried the cases up to the door for us and then left. I had noticed another car parked on the driveway and now a young lady opened the door and invited us in, handing Jacob a key and advising a card with a telephone number was on the kitchen table in case we should need anything. She stayed while we looked around the sprawling two-bedroom villa with it's decking, private pool and hot tub, the rear steps leading straight down onto the beach, and then she left us and drove away.

"Oh, my God, this is perfect," I said. "I can't wait to get in that hot tub."

"I can't wait to get you in that hot tub." Jacob grabbed me bodily and much to my shock, slung me over his shoulder and strode onto the decking, kicking off his shoes as he went.

"Shit...don't...put me down!" I panted. I struggled for a brief moment and then grinned and began to squeeze and caress his firm butt through his jeans instead.

"Damn you," Jacob grunted and put me down beside the tub. "I was going to dump you in there with your clothes on, but they're just going to be harder to get off in the water." He began to undress quickly, t-shirt, jeans, underwear, socks. In only a couple of minutes he was naked, his cock rigid and standing up straight against his stomach. "What are you waiting for? Need some help?" he grinned.

"I was just...looking at the view." I quickly began to remove my own clothes, releasing my erection with relief and hurrying to get the last few things off before we both climbed into the tub. The woman had thoughtfully left the thing turned on and it was hot and bubbling.

"We should have bought some beers or something," I said.

"There'll be some in the fridge, they said they'd stock it," Jacob told me. "But I don't want beer, I want you. Come here." He pulled me towards him and I kneeled over him, straddling his thighs, pressing close to him and reaching between us to rub our cocks together.

"You think they'll mind if we come in the tub?" he grinned.

"Probably." I ground myself against him and rubbed my thumb over the head of his cock beneath the water. He moaned and slid his hands down to my butt, pulling me tighter against him. "But I'd rather not waste it. I want you in me." I could feel my face turning red and grimaced. I would probably still blush when I was an old man and Jacob would still be teasing me about it.

"You're blushing," he smirked on cue, brushing his lips against my cheek.

"I know, stop teasing me."

"Can't help it; you're too cute when you blush." He pushed me off of his lap suddenly and jumped up. "Don't move, I'll be back in one minute."

He ran dripping into the house and returned in a minute with a couple of towels, the strawberry lube and a condom. He spread the towels out on the decking beside the tub and indicated I should join him. I climbed out of the water and lay down on the towels, wrapping my hand around my cock and stroking slowly as I watched him quickly tear open the condom packet and roll it onto himself. He wasn't wasting any time and I squirmed impatiently as he squirted lube into both hands, using one to coat himself and quickly preparing me with the other, pushing one finger and then two into me, the tips bumping my prostate until I was gasping and shuddering.

"Fuck...please...I'm ready," I panted.

He withdrew his fingers and lowered himself over me, guiding his cock in and pushing deep without hesitation. He felt so good and I wrapped both arms and legs around him, pulling him down onto me and using only the friction of his belly on my cock to stimulate myself. Now he brought his lips to mine and kissed me heatedly as he thrust into me. Neither of us lasted more than a brief few minutes as was often the case and after he pulled out and cleaned us up a little with one of the towels, we returned to the hot tub and snuggled together, remaining there until our skin began to turn wrinkly and the sun had slipped low enough in the sky to create a brilliant pink and orange sunset right in front of us.

The refrigerator was well stocked and we ate shrimp salad and fruit and shared a bottle of wine, sitting on the bottom of the steps which led to the beach, then took a walk on the sand wearing only our underwear and dipped our toes in the sea. We could do anything we wanted and unless someone was out on a boat with binoculars, we wouldn't be seen. Our beach was private, with no access to the public and I knew that the entire week was going to be pure bliss.

We didn't do a great deal for the next two days, but simply spent every minute together relaxing, exploring the immediate area on foot, swimming in the sea or the pool and making love at every opportunity. The following morning the lady who had greeted us arrived with more groceries including an amazing looking fruit basket with a bottle of wine set in the middle. Jacob took it from her and removed the small card which was stuck in it and put it in his pocket before I could see it.

"What was that?" I asked curiously.

"Um...just a card for a little surprise I organised," he said quickly. He had that shifty look about him again and I wondered what he was up to. It could only be something good however. The last time he looked as guilty as that, he had just booked this trip. I didn't push it; let him surprise me.

As the day wore on, Jacob strangely began to seem almost nervous. He was jumpy and distracted and when I asked what was wrong, he said simply that something he ate made him feel queasy. I didn't believe him this time; he seemed to be waiting for something to happen and I didn't miss the number of times he glanced at his watch and chewed his nails. He was clearly trying to behave normally and failing miserably and I asked him again what was going on. He just grinned and said he would tell me later, but I couldn't help feeling a little nervous myself without knowing why. It wasn't that I worried about what he might be planning, but more than he was clearly anxious about it himself.

Towards the end of the afternoon, Jacob took a shower and emerged from the bathroom wearing a new pair of light grey slacks and a blue shirt - some of the clothes I had bought for him in Port Angeles. He had bare feet and looked smart, but casual and completely mouthwatering.

"Going somewhere?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm taking you out somewhere special."

"Without shoes?"

"Yes. Go get ready," he grinned. "Wear the green shirt, it'll make your eyes look amazing."

Shrugging, I went to shower and shave, then put on the rich green shirt which was one he had picked out for me in the store, along with off-white pants. I didn't bother with shoes either, assuming we must be going somewhere on the beach. I put on the watch Jacob had given me for my twenty-first birthday and went to join him. It was five-thirty and dusk was only an hour away. Perhaps it was a romantic sunset dinner on the beach - that would be just like him. Why he was no nervous about it though was beyond me. I supposed I should have been more aware, but I just had no clue.

"Where are we going?" I asked again as we walked out of the back of the house and down to the beach.

"You'll see in a minute. Trust me, Edward." He took my hand and squeezed it firmly and led me along the sand to the end of our beach. A narrow sandy path led around a rocky headland and with the tide out, there was room to follow it around to the other side. We made our way around onto the next section of beach where I knew there was a jetty and a large hotel. Then Jacob halted and turned me towards him, grasping both of my hands in his.

"I'm sorry I've been weird today," he said.

"You just seemed...anxious about something,"

"Yeah. Well, now I can tell you. I can tell you that I love you with all my heart; that you make me more happy than I ever thought possible, and that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. And I want to ask you...Edward, will you marry me?"

My heart stopped. I felt as if everything around us vanished and there was only him standing in front of me, asking me to be with him for the rest of our lives; asking me what I had begun to long for him to ask in the past few months only at the same time I had been scared of what it would mean. Now he released my hands and turned me to face the other way, pointing to the jetty.

"Look...there are Jasper, Paul and Embry and the priest will be here in...five minutes. If you say yes, there'll be no planning and no time to spend worrying about it. We can go do it right now. Or you can say no and it's ok. It won't matter if you don't want..."

I spun around to face him, my heart hammering again and a huge smile splitting my face. "Of course I'm not going to say no!" I exclaimed. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed myself against him, trying not to disgrace myself by bursting into tears. "How did you know?" I asked. "How did you know this was exactly what I wanted?"

"Little bird told me," Jacob grinned.

"Jasper?"

"Yeah."

"I love you," I said. "Thank you so much for this." I took a step back from him and slid my hand into his again. "Let's get married."

"You sure?"

"Yes."

We began to walk slowly towards the jetty and the three guys waiting there cheered as they waited for us. By the time we had reached them, a priest in a dark suit and a dog collar had arrived carrying a briefcase and a book and I clutched Jacob's hand tighter; not with fear or worry, but with excitement.

"Got the rings?" Jacob asked Embry and his friend produced two small boxes from his pocket, popping them open to show me matching white gold rings. Now tears did sting my eyes and I blinked them away rapidly as we faced the priest and waited for him to begin the ceremony.

"Jacob and Edward, we are gathered here together to witness the love and respect that you have for each other," he began. "Jacob and Edward, are you entering into this marriage freely, voluntarily and without any conditions?"

"Yes," we both said in unison.

"Please face each other and repeat after me..."

I turned towards him and met his eyes. He gazed back at me with a look of adoration and I gulped as he repeated the words spoken by the priest.

"Edward, I come here today to join your life; I pledge to be true to you, to respect you and to grow with you through the years. We are many things to each other; may only those best qualities continue to shine and may our bond continue to grow stronger. Time may pass, fortune may smile, trials may come; no matter what we may encounter together, I vow here today that this love will be my only love. I will make my home in your heart from this day forward."

Now a tear did spill over and I brushed it away quickly, then breathlessly repeated the same words to Jacob, my voice wobbling slightly in the middle. Next the priest took the rings from Embry and we exchanged them, repeating more vows and then holding hands tightly. I couldn't take my eyes off of the ring on my left hand as we listened to the final words of the ceremony.

"Jacob and Edward, as you have consented together in lawful wedlock and thereto have pledged your faith to each other, and have declared the same by joining hands and giving and receiving of rings, by the powers vested in me I pronounce you are now married!"

Jasper, Paul and Embry all began to clap and cheer and Jacob drew me closer to him and gave me a warm kiss. More tears escaped and I cursed myself for being so overwhelmed, but when I drew my head back and looked at Jacob, his cheeks were wet too and I smiled and leaned against him. Jasper and Embry began to take photos with their cell phones and we were asked to sign a document and advised our marriage certificate would be delivered to us at the villa the following day. Then the priest left and the guys began to tease us, clearly having restrained themselves with difficulty in the priest's presence.

"We got you a wedding present back at the hotel," Jasper said. "Figured you probably used up all that lube by now."

"Jasper!" I exclaimed. "I'd push you off this jetty if it wasn't for the fact you're apparently the little bird that told Jacob I wanted this."

He grinned. "You remember that when you see the boat we're having dinner on."

A few minutes later a yacht drifted slowly up to the end of the jetty, its railings decorated with bunches of balloons, which on closer inspection turned out to be dozens of inflated condoms.

"Jasper Cullen!" My face burned and the others all laughed although poor Embry was as red as I felt. I wondered how he was going to cope with four gay guys around him for dinner, Jasper and Paul continuing with their lewd jokes, but eventually he simply joined in.

The yacht moved off and headed along the coast and we sat down to enjoy the food and wine which was laid out on the table on deck - a huge array of seafood including lobster, shrimp, mussels and a number of other things accompanied by salad and bread and followed by an enormous chocolate gateau laced with liqueur. Jasper continued snapping away, saying that our parents and Emmett would shoot him if he didn't at least have photos for them since they couldn't be with us.

We were returned to the jetty at midnight and Jacob and I walked back to the villa while the others left us and went into the hotel. Jacob opened the bottle of wine which had been delivered with the fruit and we shared a glass on the decking. Jacob showed me the card which had come with the basket that he had quickly hidden that morning, congratulating us on our wedding and wishing us future happiness.

We finished the wine and then Jacob got to his feet and pulled me up. My heart began to pound as we walked to the bedroom and even though we lived together and had been having sex countless times for months, I was both nervous and excited at the thought of making love for the first time with my..._husband._

We undressed slowly, watching each other, both already aroused by the time we reached our underwear. We lay down on the bed and Jacob drew me into his arms and kissed me warmly, his cock nudging mine eagerly. I moaned softly and shivered as he ran a hand lightly down my back to my butt and then drew his head back.

"Get up...turn around..."

He guided me where he wanted me and I found myself kneeling astride him, my cock hovering over his face and his twitching in front of me, encouraging me to wrap my hand around it. I leaned down and licked the head, dipping my tongue into his slit and tasting him. He groaned and pushed my thighs wider apart, lowering me and drawing my cock into his mouth. I did the same, cupping his balls and rolling them between my fingers as I sucked and licked his shaft, relaxing my throat and breathing through my nose until I had taken in most of his length. His balls tightened and I tugged them gently away from his body, drawing another louder groan from him which vibrated around my erection. The head was in his throat, my balls on his face and as I trembled and struggled to contain my orgasm, he lubed up his fingers and pushed two inside me, his free hand on my hip, urging me to fuck his mouth. I took my hand off of his balls and rested my arm on the bed to balance myself better and he immediately began to buck his hips, shoving himself deeper into my throat as he chased his own orgasm.

We came at the same time, both of us moving erratically as we attempted to suck and touch while we squirmed and shuddered and I lifted my lower body quickly afterwards, always anxious I would choke Jacob when I kneeled over him in such a fashion. I turned around and collapsed beside him, my cock temporarily spent and my chest heaving. I rested my hand on his stomach and once again looked at the beautiful ring on my finger. I had noticed when we exchanged them that they were engraved on the inside; mine said 'Jacob, forever,' and it was amazing to think that he really was mine forever.

"I love you," I murmured.

"I love you too...husband."

We rested a little while until both of us grew hard again and then Jacob slowly rolled over, pushing me onto my back and sliding his body over mine. I spread my legs open and hummed appreciatively as he shifted a little so that his cock pressed against mine.

"Our first time all over again," he murmured and then slowly pulled himself up onto his knees and grabbed the lube. He chewed his lip for a second. "So...um...do you mind if we ditch the rubbers?"

I grinned. Be able to feel more of him; his heat, his skin and his cum in me? "I was hoping you'd say that."

Jacob squeezed out some lube and I watched as he coated his erection in it. Then he tucked his hand under my butt and lifted me up a little, staying kneeling as he guided his cock slowly into me, watching its length slowly disappearing into my hole.

"Fuck...Edward...you feel amazing," he groaned.

"More...please..." I encouraged. It did feel amazing and I wanted all of him, as deep as he could go. He changed position carefully, pushing my legs back and tucking his arms behind them, thrusting himself deeper until he was pressed flush against me and he filled me completely. I grasped my own cock and began to stroke it firmly, my eyes on his face as he moved, slowly at first, pulling back only an inch or two at a time, but gradually the pace increased until he was slamming himself into me, leaning over me and bracing one hand on the wall to gain more leverage.

"Oh, God...yes..._harder!" _I jerked myself off faster, matching the pace to his cock impaling me as I felt my orgasm building. Jacob's body began to move more awkwardly and he groaned and panted, gasping out my name and various expletives as his cock swelled and twitched inside me and began to spill his seed into me. The feel of it pushed me over the edge and I spurted through my fist and onto my chest, adding my cries of pleasure to his.

"Fuck me," Jacob panted, releasing my legs and lowering himself slowly, his cock still in me.

"Again?" I grinned.

"God..." He chuckled in my ear and let his weight sink onto me, his chest heaving and his skin slick with sweat. I wrapped my arms around him and held him there, struggling to breathe with his body crushing me, but not wanting him to move. Gradually I felt him soften and slip out of me, leaving me wet and dribbling and longing to recover and do it all over again.

After a little while we reluctantly drew apart and took a shower, then collapsed back into the bed in each other's arms. I was sleepy, but I didn't want to drift off just yet. I just wanted to enjoy a few more minutes of knowing I was married and that it was my husband holding me. My Jacob. As I lay there, I thought about our names and realised that we hadn't had the opportunity to discuss whether we would keep them as they were. We had both signed our usual signatures at the end of the ceremony.

"Do you want me to take your name?" I murmured.

"Do you want to take it?" he grinned. "You don't want to just add it and have a hyphenated one?"

"Definitely not, my name's enough of a mouthful as it is."

"What, Edward Anthony Cullen? It's no worse than Jacob Ephraim Black."

"It's Edward Anthony Masen Cullen; they gave all of us our Mom's maiden name as an extra middle name," I explained.

"Yeah, well I guess that would be a mouthful then. Edward Anthony Masen Black," Jacob said slowly. "I love it. What about your business, though? You can't very well change 'Cullen Digital Design' or nobody will know you."

"I'll leave the business name as it is, just change my personal name," I said at once. "We're married, I want your name."

"Then we'll get it changed when we get home," he agreed.

"Edward Black," I whispered. "It's perfect."

If he replied, I didn't hear it as I had already fallen asleep.

We spent most of the next day with Jasper, Paul and Embry and then the following morning they would all be flying home. Jacob and I still had three more days to enjoy and we made the most of them, taking a day cruise which included snorkelling and hiring a car for a day to explore a little more of the island. I could have quite happily stayed on for a month, but sadly we had to return to reality and our businesses eventually and on the last day we packed up and waited for the Mercedes to collect us to take us to the airport. Jacob explained that the driver had known he was collecting a couple who were planning to marry, which was why he had left me to find the cases, to give him time to warn the man not to give the game away. He also told me he had taken me out for dinner one night weeks before, supposedly to give my eyes a break from my computer, while Seth took my passport and Xeroxed it so he had a form of ID to send off with the marriage booking. I was amazed by all the sneaking around that had gone into it, and more surprised that Jasper had managed to keep his mouth shut for almost two months beforehand.

The flight back was uneventful and we drove home from the airport, intending to go to my parents' house first to tell them. Jasper had told me he had merely said Paul was taking him away for a couple of days to explain his absence, although he was going to tell Emmett what we had really been doing. Both of my brothers were there, Emmett having just finished a training session with a client, and they both smirked at us as they waited for us to say something. For once Dad wasn't at the hospital and Mom was in the kitchen baking something, so we didn't have to wait to get them both together. My heart began to pound again with nervousness and I hoped they wouldn't be too upset.

"What are you two doing here on a weekday?" Mom asked, wiping flour off of her hands and coming over to give me a kiss.

"We have something to tell you," I said.

Dad looked up from his newspaper with interest. "Sounds important."

"Yes...um..." I glanced at Jacob. "We got married. On Friday."

"Married?" Mom's mouth dropped opened. "Oh, Edward! Why didn't you tell us? Didn't you want us there?"

"He didn't know," Jacob said. "I'm sorry for keeping it a secret. I knew Edward would have still been anxious after...what happened before. I decided to surprise him so he wouldn't have to worry about a huge planned thing. We went to Hawaii."

"Paul and I went as witnesses," Jasper said. "Edward would never have wanted a big wedding with a ton of guests, Mom."

"It was perfect," I added. "It was exactly what I wanted."

"I took about a thousand photographs," finished Jasper.

"Well..." Dad didn't seem to know what to say.

"Isn't anybody going to congratulate them?" Emmett shoved himself away from the counter he was leaning against and came towards us, wrapping his huge arms around both me and Jacob and crushing us in a hug. "Well done, guys. Hope you have an awesome life together."

"I am really happy for you," Mom said, taking Emmett's place a moment later. "I'm sorry if it doesn't seem that way, it was just such a huge surprise. I would have loved to be there, you know that, but I'm so glad Jacob went to such efforts to make it special for you." She gave me another kiss and then planted one on Jacob's cheek.

"Congratulations, son." Dad got up and gave me a hug and shook Jacob's hand. "I'm with your mother. It's clear how happy you two are together and I'm glad for you. But you know you're going to have to let us give you a reception. We can't overlook this completely."

"A _small_ reception," Jasper said. "Just enough for me to have an audience for my best man's speech. Ok?"

"Ok," I agreed. I didn't care if they threw one of their parties for me on this occasion. I was too happy to worry about whether anyone might embarrass me with a silly speech or whether I would be the centre of attention. I would have Jacob by my side, forever, just as it said on the inside of my wedding ring.


End file.
